Is Sidwell really Sadwell?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have an example from my own life. Have daughter at Sidwell upper school. She eschoes everything said here. Great teachers and academics. Horrible toxic social culture and cut throat student body. I tell her it reminds me of Harvard Medical. Same thing. Best education possible. Great professors and mentors. But socially and with peers, it’s a four year knife fight. Hated every day and could not leave soon enough. Never donated a single dollar to that place. Only bad memories. When new applicants apply from my Alma mater, I assume it means that they are a smart but terrible person. That is what I see in Sidwell kids (not their teachers who are great). Over confident, over privileged, smart, talented, depressed, toxic little people. Sad but true

But not you, right? You are not smart but terrible. And not your DD? She’s not an over confident, over privileged, smart, talented, depressed, toxic little person. Only the other people.

Do you hear that?

+1
so funny. bragging about the Harvard + Sidwell resume in one breath, but in the next complaining that everyone else is over privileged and toxic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Sidwell alum who was also a "lifer," the majority of the pressure that caused my own and my peer's mental health decline wasn't the school. It was our parents.

+100. This is the real answer! My children are US Sidwell students. The number of stories they’ve shared about friends being forced to take classes by their parents would make your head spin. These are classes that don’t reflect the students’ interests (some of these kids are desperately trying to hang onto a B- in Math I). There are Sidwell students crying and stressed out by Math I-IV, and some of the 1A sciences classes. My children have asked why don’t they just drop the class. The answer is almost always “because my parents won’t let me.”

How should Sidwell fix that problem?

Choose different families.

What if the children from those different families can’t handle Sidwell’s academic workload?

Of course they can. Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a Sidwell alum who was also a "lifer," the majority of the pressure that caused my own and my peer's mental health decline wasn't the school. It was our parents.

+100. This is the real answer! My children are US Sidwell students. The number of stories they’ve shared about friends being forced to take classes by their parents would make your head spin. These are classes that don’t reflect the students’ interests (some of these kids are desperately trying to hang onto a B- in Math I). There are Sidwell students crying and stressed out by Math I-IV, and some of the 1A sciences classes. My children have asked why don’t they just drop the class. The answer is almost always “because my parents won’t let me.”

How should Sidwell fix that problem?

Choose different families.

What if the children from those different families can’t handle Sidwell’s academic workload?

Of course they can. Sheesh.

Not necessarily. There are many students at other area private schools who would not do well academically at Sidwell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

Good question. Have to admit we did consider transferring. But, like I said, school is remarkably good. And once you’re there, it’s risky to transfer to a new school Junior Year. Better to just grit your teeth and plough through. I. Words of Abe Lincoln “This too shall pass”

This

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A sidwell parent here. I have to say I like the school but am deeply ashamed by how my Sidwell peers and “friends” are behaving on this thread. It’s petty and defensive. Of course, the school has a million problems. I don’t think it has anything to do with admissions issues. The kids have a toxic social culture. We discuss this in our potlucks all the time. The academic stress gets compounded by fact that generally kids can be very very mean to each other. This is not news at Sidwell. We wrestle with it in the PA all the time since they were in middle school and now they are in high school. It’s a problem. We all know this to be true as parents of Sidwell students. Peace everyone

I know several kids that have left Sidwell because of the culture. I am surprised as I always thought it was a top school in the DMV.

That is such a vague comment that it’s meaningless. How do you know they weren’t counseled out due to a rigorous academic “culture?”

Because they said so. Exact words.

I’m sure they did. It’s called spin. You’re leaving and you have to come up with a plausible reason.

Well they transferred to another top private and are not at an Ivy so I doubt they were counseled out. One at an Ivy and another at a top 20.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A sidwell parent here. I have to say I like the school but am deeply ashamed by how my Sidwell peers and “friends” are behaving on this thread. It’s petty and defensive. Of course, the school has a million problems. I don’t think it has anything to do with admissions issues. The kids have a toxic social culture. We discuss this in our potlucks all the time. The academic stress gets compounded by fact that generally kids can be very very mean to each other. This is not news at Sidwell. We wrestle with it in the PA all the time since they were in middle school and now they are in high school. It’s a problem. We all know this to be true as parents of Sidwell students. Peace everyone

I know several kids that have left Sidwell because of the culture. I am surprised as I always thought it was a top school in the DMV.

That is such a vague comment that it’s meaningless. How do you know they weren’t counseled out due to a rigorous academic “culture?”

Because they said so. Exact words.

I’m sure they did. It’s called spin. You’re leaving and you have to come up with a plausible reason.

Well they transferred to another top private and are not at an Ivy so I doubt they were counseled out. One at an Ivy and another at a top 20.

Meant they are at an Ivy. Two people. One at an Ivy and another at a top 20. I doubt they were counseled out. They wanted to leave. They said it was a very toxic environment. This is my first post on here today btw. Others are posting back and forth with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

What's the reality as you see it? TIA.
-- prospective parent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

How are you an insider as a “community member”? Define community member. You are certainly not more of an insider than me—a parent who has sent two children to Sidwell for years.

That’s the problem with most Sidwell threads on DCUM. A bunch of people start commenting about things happening at the school that they know nothing about (second and third hand information does not count).

Of course Sidwell isn’t going to be a good fit for every child that attends the school. My personal experience/observation has been that “bad fits” occur most often when parents decide it’s Sidwell or bust. They send their children to the school, even when the child expresses a strong desire to attend another school. That’s not Sidwell’s fault.

Parents who actually have valid concerns should reach out to teachers and administrators directly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

How are you an insider as a “community member”? Define community member. You are certainly not more of an insider than me—a parent who has sent two children to Sidwell for years.

That’s the problem with most Sidwell threads on DCUM. A bunch of people start commenting about things happening at the school that they know nothing about (second and third hand information does not count).

Of course Sidwell isn’t going to be a good fit for every child that attends the school. My personal experience/observation has been that “bad fits” occur most often when parents decide it’s Sidwell or bust. They send their children to the school, even when the child expresses a strong desire to attend another school. That’s not Sidwell’s fault.

Parents who actually have valid concerns should reach out to teachers and administrators directly.

Community member and insider are both meant to mean a Current HS parent - insider is not meant to be a power play

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

How are you an insider as a “community member”? Define community member. You are certainly not more of an insider than me—a parent who has sent two children to Sidwell for years.

That’s the problem with most Sidwell threads on DCUM. A bunch of people start commenting about things happening at the school that they know nothing about (second and third hand information does not count).

Of course Sidwell isn’t going to be a good fit for every child that attends the school. My personal experience/observation has been that “bad fits” occur most often when parents decide it’s Sidwell or bust. They send their children to the school, even when the child expresses a strong desire to attend another school. That’s not Sidwell’s fault.

Parents who actually have valid concerns should reach out to teachers and administrators directly.

dp: You are really self-absorbed. You need to read what PP's initial comment. She explains herself quite clearly.

You and your "Sidwell is perfect but some parents are too stupid to do school right" is not doing Sidwell any favors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

How are you an insider as a “community member”? Define community member. You are certainly not more of an insider than me—a parent who has sent two children to Sidwell for years.

That’s the problem with most Sidwell threads on DCUM. A bunch of people start commenting about things happening at the school that they know nothing about (second and third hand information does not count).

Of course Sidwell isn’t going to be a good fit for every child that attends the school. My personal experience/observation has been that “bad fits” occur most often when parents decide it’s Sidwell or bust. They send their children to the school, even when the child expresses a strong desire to attend another school. That’s not Sidwell’s fault.

Parents who actually have valid concerns should reach out to teachers and administrators directly.

Community member and insider are both meant to mean a Current HS parent - insider is not meant to be a power play

Thanks for the clarification. In your pp, you stated: “I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions.”

What difficulties and concerns do these families have that are not initially apparent, based on how Sidwell presents itself in admissions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^
then why do you send your daughter there?

This is such a tired response.....

Perhaps, but a VERY valid question.

Not for HS with 9th grade admissions. The school does NOT present itself in a way that a prospective student or parent would see the true culture. And for kids/parents that want the academics, the school a huge draw. When we went to the admissions events as current parents (while younger sibling was considering options) - it was truly remarkable how different the presentation was from reality.

Stop making excuses for your poor vetting. Yes, for HS with 9th grade admissions. If you toured the school, had your child participate in a shadow day, and spoke with multiple Sidwell families (as I did) you would have had a clear understanding of the school culture.

You decided to ignore all of the signs that Sidwell wasn’t a good fit for YOUR child because you wanted the name. That’s on you.

I'm not talking about our own decisions. I am a community member and I see a variety of experiences and they have validity. I'm telling you from an INSIDE perspective that it was truly remarkable how much of what these families are pointing to as difficulties or concerns is not at all apparent in how the school presents itself in admissions. I know you are very happy but stop pointing fingers at others and saying "why are you there" or "go elsewhere" - you have a very simplistic and closed minded view. The school is not even transparent for current families and they are very far from fully open and forthcoming in admissions. They think they don't need to do more because they have plenty of demand. That's true - but that doesn't mean it's a good thing. Especially for applicants and even more so for applicants who don't have a large network of DMV private school families to draw upon.

The families that are bringing up concerns in this thread have valid ones....it doesn't negate that you have no concerns or that you don't have the same ones they do. But, guess what, the fact that you are ok doesn't negate their concerns either. You are insufferable.

How are you an insider as a “community member”? Define community member. You are certainly not more of an insider than me—a parent who has sent two children to Sidwell for years.

That’s the problem with most Sidwell threads on DCUM. A bunch of people start commenting about things happening at the school that they know nothing about (second and third hand information does not count).

Of course Sidwell isn’t going to be a good fit for every child that attends the school. My personal experience/observation has been that “bad fits” occur most often when parents decide it’s Sidwell or bust. They send their children to the school, even when the child expresses a strong desire to attend another school. That’s not Sidwell’s fault.

Parents who actually have valid concerns should reach out to teachers and administrators directly.

dp: You are really self-absorbed. You need to read what PP's initial comment. She explains herself quite clearly.

You and your "Sidwell is perfect but some parents are too stupid to do school right" is not doing Sidwell any favors.

What are you blathering on about?!? Do you think my job is to do “Sidwell any favors” on DCUM? I don’t care what you, anonymous poster, think about me or Sidwell.

Have the day you deserve.