What can American women learn from foreign women?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with stereotypical American women is that they don't think they have anything to learn. From anyone. Ever.

Ironically
If you are familiar with history
Foreign women were not ashamed to march in NY and declare that in their home country women had the right to vote

You talking about a century ago when American women were more tolerable? I thought we were talking about present day women.

American women have way too much masculine energy. Very unappealing. And they're not even aware of it.

The wording might be offensive but this is probably the stereotypical impression that foreign men have of American women.
Not everyone obviously, but on average they seem to have more masculine energy (loud, talkative, opinionated, assertive, demanding, intimidating, big) compared to foreign women.

💯

But this is a good thing for women and American society. Women should not want to mold themselves into the male ideal if they end up quiet, docile, neutral beings with only their caretaking and sexual appeal to offer. How does that help women advance and secure their own place in society? That only helps men.

+1

Also, lots of American women marry great men without changing who they are. I'm loud, opinionated, have been accused of being intimidating, etc. Some men criticized me for that but a) I did not GAF about their opinion and b) I knew I'd rather be single than change for the sake of a guy. It would have been a bait and switch anyway, lol.

And lumping all European women into one basket is sort of funny. Greta Thunberg is just one of many European women who is also not Andrew-Tate approved.

In many marriages were men are an equal partner, the women have " male energy". You know why? That's the language men understand.

Look at all these traits of foreign women that these American men want. Yet the foreign men and their cultures still treat these women like trash. All the femininity and gentleness in the world just boosts the male ego. It does not stop a man from putting himself first

My sweetest nicest friends are all married to jerks who don't pull their weight at anything besides making an income( and some of these women work too).

[Anonymous]

I m foreign woman. I came to America for work in stem field.

Some of my friends from home country came here too for various reason. We admire American women

We r middle class to upper middle class in our home country. We have maid driver and everything. Asian men usually do nothing regarding domestic household work. We admire American women for doing it all in and outside of the house work. I know your husband help but still a lot to do.

Yeah it’s a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sex? I know my cousin is very sexual and her white bf is tired haha can't handle a sexy latina. Well just that guy. Not everyone is the same

Ana de armas - American women could learn a lot more from her than Taylor swift

? how do you know what Ana de Armas is like? Or Taylor Swift, for that matter? Do you know them both personally?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with stereotypical American women is that they don't think they have anything to learn. From anyone. Ever.

Ironically
If you are familiar with history
Foreign women were not ashamed to march in NY and declare that in their home country women had the right to vote

You talking about a century ago when American women were more tolerable? I thought we were talking about present day women.

American women have way too much masculine energy. Very unappealing. And they're not even aware of it.

The wording might be offensive but this is probably the stereotypical impression that foreign men have of American women.
Not everyone obviously, but on average they seem to have more masculine energy (loud, talkative, opinionated, assertive, demanding, intimidating, big) compared to foreign women.

💯

But this is a good thing for women and American society. Women should not want to mold themselves into the male ideal if they end up quiet, docile, neutral beings with only their caretaking and sexual appeal to offer. How does that help women advance and secure their own place in society? That only helps men.

+1

Also, lots of American women marry great men without changing who they are. I'm loud, opinionated, have been accused of being intimidating, etc. Some men criticized me for that but a) I did not GAF about their opinion and b) I knew I'd rather be single than change for the sake of a guy. It would have been a bait and switch anyway, lol.

And lumping all European women into one basket is sort of funny. Greta Thunberg is just one of many European women who is also not Andrew-Tate approved.

+1 I'm an Asian American woman, and I've always been opinionated and assertive. How else are you going to get ahead in the work place? I suppose if you don't care about your career, then it doesn't matter, but being meek and subservient doesn't get you anywhere in life or the workplace.

American and Asian men can't seem to handle that. Hence this thread.

My DH is British.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sex? I know my cousin is very sexual and her white bf is tired haha can't handle a sexy latina. Well just that guy. Not everyone is the same

Ana de armas - American women could learn a lot more from her than Taylor swift

I don't see Ana de Armas selling out stadium after stadium after stadium after stadium.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

+1.

These wives transfer the abuse they receive from their lazy husbands to slave laborers.

[Anonymous]

PP who is Eastern Euro - I think the combination of being opinionated and assertive isn’t a problem, and isn’t unique to American women. A high level of narcissism in combination with those traits is challenging and is also more likely to exist in the individualistic American culture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

+1.

These wives transfer the abuse they receive from their lazy husbands to slave laborers.

I don't think we should be emulating any countries that have slave laborers or a lot of low paid people working in homes. IF there is a country without practically slave labor with feminine women who are also respected by their husbands I'm all ears to those lessons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I think American women, the wealthier and the more educated they are, impose too many rules and regulations on themselves. The rules are stiffening, and those who don’t follow those ever-multiplying rules are getting judged by fellow women.

Such as what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

I lived in the Middle East (Gulf) for a while and, indeed, it was essentially a slave state. Great if you are a native Arab, not so much if you are the help.

Of course life would be materially easier if we all had slaves entrenched in an inescapable caste system but didn’t we work hard to advance past that social system as a civilization?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

+1.

These wives transfer the abuse they receive from their lazy husbands to slave laborers.

I don't think we should be emulating any countries that have slave laborers or a lot of low paid people working in homes. IF there is a country without practically slave labor with feminine women who are also respected by their husbands I'm all ears to those lessons.

Isn't the mormon community in SLC like this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I think American women, the wealthier and the more educated they are, impose too many rules and regulations on themselves. The rules are stiffening, and those who don’t follow those ever-multiplying rules are getting judged by fellow women.

Such as what?

Such as all the parenting philosophies, for example. Why do you think all the books about the benefits of foreign parenting approaches are written by American women and insanely popular in the US? American mothers crave approval and rules to abide.

Look at this forum board. The timeline of marriage and 3 kids 2 years apart within a narrow window. God forbid, you do it outside of the established norms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t expect you man to be a woman. Don’t expect him to see, understand or emotionally support you.

So what do foreign women see a man is good for? If they aren't to emotionally support you or understand you in any way?

$ and green card

Then why do so many Japanese and Korean women desire American boyfriends and husbands? Japan and South Korea are both rich and beautiful countries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My parents are from a Middle Eastern culture and I think there is so much pressure on women in that culture to conform to the following standard:

- educated with a high paying career
- keep up their looks, don’t get fat, dress pretty and wear makeup and have long glossy black hair
- maintain an attractive, clean home and know how to cook, or you will look bad
- religious (but you still have to look sexy) and raising children to behave appropriately and follow cultural expectations

The men have the following expectations:
- have a job

I think American men may find this nightmare sort of awesome.

Uh, no. In patriarchal cultures, men have to be rich to have social value. (Actually, this is true in all cultures to varying degrees.)

She meant having a job is the only expectation for men while women have to be perfect in almost every way.

So an American man with a decent job who is even remotely helpful in other ways is a step up from their own men. This is true about a lot of foreign cultures as you can see from this thread.

So while American men could be better, they are better than most. So it makes sense for them to look abroad for women who will compare them to their local men.

Actually, the Middle East is still one of the few remaining places on Earth where women can choose to remain homemakers without losing any social standing. I am married to an Arab and no, women are not all expected to have a high-paying career. In fact, it is assumed that once you marry, your family becomes your priority. Financial support is the duty of the husband, not the wife.

Also, if you are from a religious family, you are not expected to dress sexy at all. In fact, the window of acceptable dressing for you is quite narrow.

So I think you're describing a very small subset of the Middle East culture.

To add to this, I found the Middle East to be one of the few places where it is assumed that a woman who works will have household help. Our Arab relatives would find it quite wild that a woman can be expected to work AND cook and clean. Quite simply, if the wife works and brings in income, she will outsource most of the household work. Someone will come to cook, clean and tend to the children.

You realize that's because of robust immigration, which allows poor women from other countries - the Philippines, Bangladesh, China - to come and be your servant! I used to live on a Pacific island where even the poorest families had house cleaners and cooks - and it's because, again, of essentially open borders that allowed for desperate to come and take those jobs. There was tons of abuse - and much cleaner houses. We could have that here, too, if we wanted.

+1.

These wives transfer the abuse they receive from their lazy husbands to slave laborers.

I don't think we should be emulating any countries that have slave laborers or a lot of low paid people working in homes. IF there is a country without practically slave labor with feminine women who are also respected by their husbands I'm all ears to those lessons.

Isn't the mormon community in SLC like this?

Mormon stuff is complicated

Utah also has some of the highest anti depressant usage rates and plastic surgery rates

Mormon women are really hot (dare I saw I got my head turned more at slc airport than San Diego)

But their husbands really put a huge priority on looking the part