Advice for gay son about to start college?

[Anonymous]

DS starts college this fall (in London, if that's helpful?)! He also is gay and has been out for a couple of years. This is random but I'm just thinking, I don't know much about the gay college experiences, especially not in the UK, as a straight lady from the Midwest! If anyone has anything they'd recommend I pass on please let me know. And it being UK-related isn't required, but helpful haha!

[Anonymous]

Get him on prep if he isn’t already.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get him on prep if he isn’t already.

+1.

[Anonymous]

What is prep?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is prep?

HIV prophylactic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is prep?

HIV prophylactic

Is that safe to take without some type of exposure? Don’t they have a morning after pill for possible hiv exposure and is that safer?

I was watching worst ex ever on Netflix. Maybe have a little conversation about domestic violence because that can happen.

[Anonymous]

HPV vaccine for sure.

[Anonymous]

That he reads this:


https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1326871.page

[Anonymous]

To be brutally honest, OP, I would tell him to be very discreet at first until he's more attuned to his surroundings. I grew up in Scotland. I know things have changed for the better, but there's still such a thing as gay bashing, literally, especially in bar situations. There is such a thing as gay hunting, where people of certain orientations are lured into dangerous situations. He needs to be cautious about any encounter and already know the person and feel safe with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To be brutally honest, OP, I would tell him to be very discreet at first until he's more attuned to his surroundings. I grew up in Scotland. I know things have changed for the better, but there's still such a thing as gay bashing, literally, especially in bar situations. There is such a thing as gay hunting, where people of certain orientations are lured into dangerous situations. He needs to be cautious about any encounter and already know the person and feel safe with them.

Gay adult. I would NOT tell my gay kid this. They have enough to be scared of. The last thing you want to do is to project your fear and shame onto them. Your son may perceive (incorrectly), that you're ashamed of him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be brutally honest, OP, I would tell him to be very discreet at first until he's more attuned to his surroundings. I grew up in Scotland. I know things have changed for the better, but there's still such a thing as gay bashing, literally, especially in bar situations. There is such a thing as gay hunting, where people of certain orientations are lured into dangerous situations. He needs to be cautious about any encounter and already know the person and feel safe with them.

Gay adult. I would NOT tell my gay kid this. They have enough to be scared of. The last thing you want to do is to project your fear and shame onto them. Your son may perceive (incorrectly), that you're ashamed of him.

Really? I don't think any kid of mine would ever believe I was ashamed of them. They would understand that such advice comes from genuine fear for their safety.

[Anonymous]

Condoms, condoms, condoms!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To be brutally honest, OP, I would tell him to be very discreet at first until he's more attuned to his surroundings. I grew up in Scotland. I know things have changed for the better, but there's still such a thing as gay bashing, literally, especially in bar situations. There is such a thing as gay hunting, where people of certain orientations are lured into dangerous situations. He needs to be cautious about any encounter and already know the person and feel safe with them.

Gay adult. I would NOT tell my gay kid this. They have enough to be scared of. The last thing you want to do is to project your fear and shame onto them. Your son may perceive (incorrectly), that you're ashamed of him.

Really? I don't think any kid of mine would ever believe I was ashamed of them. They would understand that such advice comes from genuine fear for their safety.

I'm sure this is heavily context dependent, but by mom said things like this, and I absolutely interpreted that she was ashamed of me and didn't want people to know I was gay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Condoms, condoms, condoms!

+1. Or really, tell this to any kid about to start college, assuming they'll be having sex where penises are involved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS starts college this fall (in London, if that's helpful?)! He also is gay and has been out for a couple of years. This is random but I'm just thinking, I don't know much about the gay college experiences, especially not in the UK, as a straight lady from the Midwest! If anyone has anything they'd recommend I pass on please let me know. And it being UK-related isn't required, but helpful haha!

Stop being gay.