Forum Index
»
Preschool and Daycare Discussion
Daycare Incident Report
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| When my husband picked my 14 month old son up at daycare today, he had a big scratch on his face. The teacher gave my husband an incident report that said another child tried to grab a toy from my son and "accidentially" scratched his face, but the report also said that the teachers would talk to the kids about "this behavior." I know that these things happen at this age, and it isn't a big deal, but I asked which child the incident had happened with and they refused to tell me. Is that unusual? I wasn't going to confront the child or the parent or anything crazy like that, but it just bothered me that they were being secretive about it. What could the reason for this be? |
Anonymous
| I think it's standard not to give the name of the other child involved in the incident. (In my son's 5-child home daycare, names were given out--but everything was handled much less formally.) |
Anonymous
| But what is the reason? So that parents don't freak out and confront other parents? It just bothers me that something relatively significant happened in my DS's life, and they won't tell me the details of it. |
Anonymous
| They do not tell parents who the perp is to prevent crazy, alpha, DC Metro parents from confronting either the child or the parents. And please note, I am not saying you are one of these parents. I am telling you that I am. The first time my kid got bitten at daycare, my husband found out first and told me. I asked who did it and he recited the policy to me that had been recited to him (and you). I flipped out on the phone with him and I mean flipped out. At the end of my rant I asked my husband why on earth such a stupid ass policy existed and my husband's response was because of crazy idiot parents like me who would go off on somebody else over stuff like this. Point taken. Don't worry though. As soon as he can talk, he will tell you who bit him, scratched him, etc. |
Anonymous
| Get used to it. You will never get the name of any kid who hurts, bugs or gets in trouble because of or with your child from the school. Once your child begins to talk you can find out from your child. |
Anonymous
| This is a standard policy. My son is autistic and sometimes is the aggressor (elementary school). He hits or kicks when he gets frustrated. They won't even tell us who he hit so he can write an apology. They help him apologize at school, but they have never told us who got the bad end of his temper. He usually tells us, but sometimes he doesn't know the child's name. |
Anonymous
So what happens in the meantime? Children are hit, bitten, scratched, run over??? |
Anonymous
No, the daycare staff do their jobs and take care of all the children entrusted to them. |
Anonymous
|
IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. These things happen. Do you think the other kid had the preliminary intent to set out and hurt your kid? And a scratch is not "a significant incident" in anyones life. It's nothing more than a "scratch'.
Personally, as long as I was confident there was good supervision, then i wouldn't think there was an issue beyond that. |
Anonymous
| This is part of daycare. If it happens repeatedly talk to your director to see if it's the same child and that child needs to be addressed or if it's multiple children and the teachers need to be watching more closely. But this will happen from time to time at this age. |
Anonymous
| I can't speak for all day care centers but I do know this is a common situation. The big corporate centers are very careful about keeping the names under wraps. You are right, they do it to protect themselves and the parents of the child who did the offensive act. Most children have a biting/scratching episode sometime along the way. A few select few make it a habit and cannot control their little bodies. The good news is that in a few months your child will be able to rat out his little buddy. Hang in there, it's just one of the many things that parents have to put up with in group care. My child was bitten a week ago and I just about flipped out too. |
Anonymous
Yes, because they won't tell you the kids name they are definitely allowing other kids to hit, bite and scratch your child. Your are ever so logical. |
Anonymous
|
Even intentional scratches (and bites and kicks)are going to happen. I can guarantee that.
|
Anonymous
Did OP say that the daycare handed her a note saying "We are planning to have a scratching, kicking and biting free-for-all. Parents, your children are free to assault each other because we don't give a damn"? This is just about not giving a name! |
Anonymous
| OP here - I am not looking to confront the scratcher, nor do I think the scratcher is a bad kid. He or she is just a baby with little or no impulse control. It just irks me out that they daycare would intentionally withhold information about something that happened to my son. For the person who questioned whether this was a significant incident in my son's life, right now, his life and experiences are very limited, so yes, at present, it is. |