Friends, even acquaintances, who want a Mother’s Day Report

[Anonymous]

For the record, no, I’m not bitter—I am, right now, enjoying exactly the Mother’s Day I wanted: a clean house, homemade cards, a take-out dinner later, and basically staying in bed all day.

But what gives with no less than 10 friends or even people I’m more like acquaintances with checking in to see “how my Mother’s Day is going. Anything special?” Like, do whatever you want, enjoy your family. Why are we comparing notes?

Some people are doing fancy brunches or even a night in a hotel, and that’s great. A few people are complaining that “Ted got me flowers, but I’m still folding laundry all day.” Like, OK, I hope everyone has a good day, but I honestly don’t feel the need to “check in and see how Mother’s Day is going.” I honestly don’t care what other people are up to today. Why do others care? Do you have a chart, with rankings and a leaderboard? Why not just enjoy the day?

[Anonymous]

I have to agree. I find these messages annoying too. Just say happy Mother’s Day and leave it at that.

[Anonymous]

I usually send a happy mother's Day text to friends who are moms but I can't imagine asking for a rundown on their day. That would annoy me.

I also think a lot of people get this idea that everyone likes to celebrate special days the exact way they do, and anything else is somehow inferior. I don't like going out to brunch on mothers day -- it's crowded and busy and it's not my favorite meal. I'd rather stay home and get bagels or something, read books with daughters in the back yard, and take a nap. I'd be so annoyed if a friend wanted to poopoo my day because she thinks anything other than $100/head brunch at a fancy restaurant us sad.

[Anonymous]

Same. We don’t celebrate Mother’s Day bc I think it’s ridiculous. When kids were younger I’d get the cards they made at school.
Now, my birthday, on the other hand ——-

[Anonymous]

I genuinely don’t even understand texting Happy Mother’s Day to anyone who isn’t your own mom, maybe your MIL, mayyyyybe your sister or SIL. But other than that, leave me alone. I get flooded with texts and find it to be annoying. I even got a text from a male coworker who left our company *six years ago.* Just no.

[Anonymous]

Gentle reader:

Mother’s Day is meant to be celebrated by people honoring their mother, grandmother, and/or a woman who played that mother figure in your life.

You do not need to reach out to anyone else. Coworkers, friends, neighbors, etc. need not text other women today.

I’m baffled by the number of texts I’ve received today…starting well before I woke up. ICYMI: there’s never a need for anyone to text someone at 7:46am on a Sunday morning.

PS - Mother’s Day isn’t a day to celebrate dog or cat moms. I’m sure there’s a national dog day for something along those lines. I’m bracing myself for the water cooler talk later this week when the fur babies are heralded with pictures and updates on what they did on Mother’s Day (hint: it always involves a walk).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I genuinely don’t even understand texting Happy Mother’s Day to anyone who isn’t your own mom, maybe your MIL, mayyyyybe your sister or SIL. But other than that, leave me alone. I get flooded with texts and find it to be annoying. I even got a text from a male coworker who left our company *six years ago.* Just no.

I don’t know, in my tight circle of three, we always remind each other how thankful we are for each other on the motherhood journey because it is not easy and they have been my rock at times, vice versa.

[Anonymous]

My sister-in-law texted me happy Mother’s Day fully expecting me to respond with happy Mother’s Day to you too even though she has no children just has a dog. I just said thank you. I know this is true because I’ve heard her complain about it… Good grief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gentle reader:

Mother’s Day is meant to be celebrated by people honoring their mother, grandmother, and/or a woman who played that mother figure in your life.

You do not need to reach out to anyone else. Coworkers, friends, neighbors, etc. need not text other women today.

I’m baffled by the number of texts I’ve received today…starting well before I woke up. ICYMI: there’s never a need for anyone to text someone at 7:46am on a Sunday morning.

PS - Mother’s Day isn’t a day to celebrate dog or cat moms. I’m sure there’s a national dog day for something along those lines. I’m bracing myself for the water cooler talk later this week when the fur babies are heralded with pictures and updates on what they did on Mother’s Day (hint: it always involves a walk).

Disagree. My mom lives far a way. My neighborhood moms are constantly helping/advising/supporting each other. We definitely share mother's Day wishes!

[Anonymous]

I think people are just being friendly and making conversation but it can be a lot when all the group chats start going off at 8 am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I genuinely don’t even understand texting Happy Mother’s Day to anyone who isn’t your own mom, maybe your MIL, mayyyyybe your sister or SIL. But other than that, leave me alone. I get flooded with texts and find it to be annoying. I even got a text from a male coworker who left our company *six years ago.* Just no.

I don’t know, in my tight circle of three, we always remind each other how thankful we are for each other on the motherhood journey because it is not easy and they have been my rock at times, vice versa.

This. I send a HMD text to a handful of close friends because I know how hard they work at being moms and I want them to know I see it, including the stuff their kids and sometimes even spouses just don't see or appreciate. It's not performative. I truly appreciate then as mothers.

I would never send a text to a random colleague or acquaintance about mother's Day, I don't know how they feel about it or what their situation is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gentle reader:

Mother’s Day is meant to be celebrated by people honoring their mother, grandmother, and/or a woman who played that mother figure in your life.

You do not need to reach out to anyone else. Coworkers, friends, neighbors, etc. need not text other women today.

I’m baffled by the number of texts I’ve received today…starting well before I woke up. ICYMI: there’s never a need for anyone to text someone at 7:46am on a Sunday morning.

PS - Mother’s Day isn’t a day to celebrate dog or cat moms. I’m sure there’s a national dog day for something along those lines. I’m bracing myself for the water cooler talk later this week when the fur babies are heralded with pictures and updates on what they did on Mother’s Day (hint: it always involves a walk).

Counterpoint: I have a child free friend who always wishes me a happy mother's day, because she knows what being a mom means to me, and I always wish her a happy dog mom day because I know how much she loves her dog. It's a thing between us and we like it. It doesn't impact you at all so don't tell me how to celebrate the day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I genuinely don’t even understand texting Happy Mother’s Day to anyone who isn’t your own mom, maybe your MIL, mayyyyybe your sister or SIL. But other than that, leave me alone. I get flooded with texts and find it to be annoying. I even got a text from a male coworker who left our company *six years ago.* Just no.

I don’t know, in my tight circle of three, we always remind each other how thankful we are for each other on the motherhood journey because it is not easy and they have been my rock at times, vice versa.

This. I send a HMD text to a handful of close friends because I know how hard they work at being moms and I want them to know I see it, including the stuff their kids and sometimes even spouses just don't see or appreciate. It's not performative. I truly appreciate then as mothers.

I would never send a text to a random colleague or acquaintance about mother's Day, I don't know how they feel about it or what their situation is.

It might not be performative, but the recipients might roll their eyes and assume you are fishing for a text or info on their celebrations. Hopefully you didn’t text anyone this morning, pp. Sunday mornings should be sacred, and Mother’s Day is meant for family time. Your well intended wishes could be perceived as an intrusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I genuinely don’t even understand texting Happy Mother’s Day to anyone who isn’t your own mom, maybe your MIL, mayyyyybe your sister or SIL. But other than that, leave me alone. I get flooded with texts and find it to be annoying. I even got a text from a male coworker who left our company *six years ago.* Just no.

I don’t know, in my tight circle of three, we always remind each other how thankful we are for each other on the motherhood journey because it is not easy and they have been my rock at times, vice versa.

That makes a lot more sense than coworkers. And I’ve heard from three today. Like, I will see you tomorrow, Carol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gentle reader:

Mother’s Day is meant to be celebrated by people honoring their mother, grandmother, and/or a woman who played that mother figure in your life.

You do not need to reach out to anyone else. Coworkers, friends, neighbors, etc. need not text other women today.

I’m baffled by the number of texts I’ve received today…starting well before I woke up. ICYMI: there’s never a need for anyone to text someone at 7:46am on a Sunday morning.

PS - Mother’s Day isn’t a day to celebrate dog or cat moms. I’m sure there’s a national dog day for something along those lines. I’m bracing myself for the water cooler talk later this week when the fur babies are heralded with pictures and updates on what they did on Mother’s Day (hint: it always involves a walk).

Counterpoint: I have a child free friend who always wishes me a happy mother's day, because she knows what being a mom means to me, and I always wish her a happy dog mom day because I know how much she loves her dog. It's a thing between us and we like it. It doesn't impact you at all so don't tell me how to celebrate the day.

I’m the pp and I think it’s nice that you validate your friend’s desperate need to be acknowledged on Mother’s Day even though she isn’t actually a mom and the day has nothing to do with pets. You are a good friend.