Help getting 2.5 year old to sleep

Anonymous
We feel like we’ve tried everything at this point. We cannot get our 2.5 year old to go to sleep. We start our bedtime routine at 7-7:30 everyday and if she’s asleep by 10 it’s a good day. She does nap at daycare but even when she doesn’t nap because she’s home she still won’t go to sleep. She says she wants to play.

Any ideas for getting her to wind down and go to bed?
Anonymous
If she is not cranky during the day, falling asleep in the car for short car trips, you probably have a low normal sleep needs kid.

None of my kids were asleep before 8pm on the dot. The daycare nap is stealing night time sleep.

I had to end my 3 year old's nap when I brought his baby sister home from the hospital and he was keeping me up at 10:30pm.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If she is not cranky during the day, falling asleep in the car for short car trips, you probably have a low normal sleep needs kid.

None of my kids were asleep before 8pm on the dot. The daycare nap is stealing night time sleep.

I had to end my 3 year old's nap when I brought his baby sister home from the hospital and he was keeping me up at 10:30pm.


She can be very cranky. And she’ll fall asleep in the car before we are out of the driveway. She also wakes up cranky if she doesn’t wake on her own.
Anonymous
You put your dc to bed at whatever time you deem necessary, say goodnight, and that's it. (It's one of those simple but hard things- make sure your spouse is on board so you can back each other up.) Sometimes my kids would sing or play stuffed animals for a long time before falling asleep. It's fine. We still had ours in cribs at 2.5 with the mattress lowered (so they could not climb out) but if yours is in a bed, you just walk them back silently every time they leave the room. No negotiating, no "just one more hug" or "one more story," no cup of water.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If she is not cranky during the day, falling asleep in the car for short car trips, you probably have a low normal sleep needs kid.

None of my kids were asleep before 8pm on the dot. The daycare nap is stealing night time sleep.

I had to end my 3 year old's nap when I brought his baby sister home from the hospital and he was keeping me up at 10:30pm.


She can be very cranky. And she’ll fall asleep in the car before we are out of the driveway. She also wakes up cranky if she doesn’t wake on her own.

What are the delay tactics?
Anonymous
How much time does she get with her parents each day? She may actually mean it when she says she wants you to play with her if she rarely sees you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:She does nap at daycare but even when she doesn’t nap because she’s home she still won’t go to sleep.

We had this issue with both our kids. When the nap was eliminated at preschool/daycare, the consistency kicked in and their bedtime shifted back to 7pm on both weekdays and on weekends.

Our preschool insisted on naps until our kids were around 3.5 or 4. We couldn't convince them that 0 nap + 7pm bedtime = more net sleep than 1.5 hour nap + 10pm bedtime.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She does nap at daycare but even when she doesn’t nap because she’s home she still won’t go to sleep.

We had this issue with both our kids. When the nap was eliminated at preschool/daycare, the consistency kicked in and their bedtime shifted back to 7pm on both weekdays and on weekends.

Our preschool insisted on naps until our kids were around 3.5 or 4. We couldn't convince them that 0 nap + 7pm bedtime = more net sleep than 1.5 hour nap + 10pm bedtime.

I wager they insist on naps because that is the only window they can sit down and eat lunch with two hands for 15 minutes and change a tampon in peace.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:She does nap at daycare but even when she doesn’t nap because she’s home she still won’t go to sleep.

We had this issue with both our kids. When the nap was eliminated at preschool/daycare, the consistency kicked in and their bedtime shifted back to 7pm on both weekdays and on weekends.

Our preschool insisted on naps until our kids were around 3.5 or 4. We couldn't convince them that 0 nap + 7pm bedtime = more net sleep than 1.5 hour nap + 10pm bedtime.

I wager they insist on naps because that is the only window they can sit down and eat lunch with two hands for 15 minutes and change a tampon in peace.


OP here. I always thought it was state regulations, though I also fully support the break for staff. At home we do quiet time for my oldest who doesn’t nap.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:How much time does she get with her parents each day? She may actually mean it when she says she wants you to play with her if she rarely sees you.


That's a pretty big projection there. Also, the dc says she wants to "play" - not "play with mom."
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If she is not cranky during the day, falling asleep in the car for short car trips, you probably have a low normal sleep needs kid.

None of my kids were asleep before 8pm on the dot. The daycare nap is stealing night time sleep.

I had to end my 3 year old's nap when I brought his baby sister home from the hospital and he was keeping me up at 10:30pm.


She can be very cranky. And she’ll fall asleep in the car before we are out of the driveway. She also wakes up cranky if she doesn’t wake on her own.

What are the delay tactics?


Delay tactics are screaming, laying at the door and singing, climbing into older sibling’s bunk bed (he usually falls asleep in our bed to avoid this conflict), reading every book on the shelf, playing with stuffies, emptying any bin or drawer.

We are generally team wait it out unless it’s unsafe which sometimes it is. The door knob is switched so it locks from the outside to keep her in. She’s not destructive but the room is definitely a mess after. We will have to start moving stuff out so there’s less interesting stuff to do.

We have been very intentional about family time and individual time after we get home. She’s getting at least two hours of family time and usually at least 30 individual time.

Anonymous
Is she amenable to a sticker chart or bribery?

Is she hearing older siblings play while she has to go to sleep? Can older sibling go to bed at the same time and get up an hour earlier? Maybe she is jealous

Are you able to get an hour of walk in before bedtime? That might help alot.

We have an alarm clock that has "blue time". Our kids are allowed to play in their room. When the blue light turns off they have to go to bed. There is an endless parade of bathroom and water trips but they are in bed within 30 minutes (they are older than your's)

Anonymous
I think I would be wound up too if I were getting locked in a room for two hours before I was ready to sleep. Start routine more like 8:30 and read to her and tell her you will stay until she goes to sleep. Then start working away from that once she is able to do bath, books, settle down with you there.

Locking her in a room while she pulls the drawers out of the dresser is not helping with her sleepiness. You are probably giving her anxiety and making her stay up even later.
Anonymous
I do not have guidance but am in the same boat. This also happened with my oldest at this age and it only got better the following winter when it started getting dark earlier. I don’t even mind if she’s playing on her own, we did that for awhile, but now it’s gotten very loud and she is waking up her big sister who she shares a room with…so touch!

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think I would be wound up too if I were getting locked in a room for two hours before I was ready to sleep. Start routine more like 8:30 and read to her and tell her you will stay until she goes to sleep. Then start working away from that once she is able to do bath, books, settle down with you there.

Locking her in a room while she pulls the drawers out of the dresser is not helping with her sleepiness. You are probably giving her anxiety and making her stay up even later.


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