Belle Burden’s “Strangers”

[Anonymous]

The author wrote a NYT Modern Love column 5 years ago about the abrupt demise of her marriage and how her husband immediately walked out after his affair was discovered and told her to keep the kids and everything else. Now she’s written a book about her experience. It’s generating buzz because she’s from an elite old-money New York family. I can somewhat understand dumping a spouse cold turkey but who leaves their kids?
https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/11/books/review/belle-burden-strangers-divorce-memoir.html?smid=url-share

[Anonymous]

Who says, "you can keep the kids." ?!?!

Even the worst asses pretend to want some custody and then just cancel or slowly pull away while pretending it's the kids or the mom that is preventing the relationship with the Dad.

[Anonymous]

Article said he got a 2 br space and used one as an office. No room for kids to stay.

[Anonymous]

Looks like her used her family connections to become successful and then decamped once he made it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who says, "you can keep the kids." ?!?!

Even the worst asses pretend to want some custody and then just cancel or slowly pull away while pretending it's the kids or the mom that is preventing the relationship with the Dad.

He's a hedge fund douchebag. Why would you expect anything else?

[Anonymous]

I have zero respect for any man who would deny his children. None.

[Anonymous]

Imagine getting dumped by your douchey husband and not being able to cry into your pillow made of hundred dollar bills. Yawn.

[Anonymous]

As someone who found out about a long term affair just a few weeks into COVID, I so related when I read her piece in NYT.

Also- was totally blindsided with kids the same age as hers.

The entire world was shutting down and in flux and to have this happen right then….it was something. So much further isolating since nobody was meeting in person at that time and you were isolated at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Looks like her used her family connections to become successful and then decamped once he made it.

Her grandmother was THE Babe Paley !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Looks like her used her family connections to become successful and then decamped once he made it.

Her grandmother was THE Babe Paley !

He went to Yale law school and hit on her when she was an associate at his firm and she was much older and more established. And then dumped her for some much younger woman affair partner at work when she was 50.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Looks like her used her family connections to become successful and then decamped once he made it.

Her grandmother was THE Babe Paley !

He went to Yale law school and hit on her when she was an associate at his firm and she was much older and more established. And then dumped her for some much younger woman affair partner at work when she was 50.

Did he end up with the AP? Who had little kids of her own.

[Anonymous]

I read her book "Strangers" and she is a eloquent writer about her upbringing, courtship/marriage, and its disintegration.

Her ex grew up upper middle class, but his family ran out of their previous financial means.

He found out about Belle's connections after reading about a talk she was giving at the library on her father's book collection. He seemed to use her as a way to get a leg up in the world he was around but didn't really have access to until her.

It doesn't say in the book what happened with him/AP just that he hasn't remarried. The crazy part was once the affair was discovered, his AP tried to commit suicide by swallowing pills but survived. She was a 35 year old banker who met through his work with young kids.

One detail mentioned in the book was their prenup. All earnings during the marriage he made was his to keep alone which ended up being millions. Joint properties like homes were to be split. However, Belle emptied her trusts to buy the Martha's Vineyard house, Tribeca apartment. She got to keep those homes in the end.

The worst part is not wanting joint custody, specific visitation with the kids. One thing to leave your spouse but your kids?

Of course, she has financial means that makes a softer landing, but the pain of not just the abandonment of her but the kids was very sad to read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The author wrote a NYT Modern Love column 5 years ago about the abrupt demise of her marriage and how her husband immediately walked out after his affair was discovered and told her to keep the kids and everything else. Now she’s written a book about her experience. It’s generating buzz because she’s from an elite old-money New York family. I can somewhat understand dumping a spouse cold turkey but who leaves their kids?
https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/11/books/review/belle-burden-strangers-divorce-memoir.html?smid=url-share

Who leaves their kids? PLENTY of men have done this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I read her book "Strangers" and she is a eloquent writer about her upbringing, courtship/marriage, and its disintegration.

Her ex grew up upper middle class, but his family ran out of their previous financial means.

He found out about Belle's connections after reading about a talk she was giving at the library on her father's book collection. He seemed to use her as a way to get a leg up in the world he was around but didn't really have access to until her.

It doesn't say in the book what happened with him/AP just that he hasn't remarried. The crazy part was once the affair was discovered, his AP tried to commit suicide by swallowing pills but survived. She was a 35 year old banker who met through his work with young kids.

One detail mentioned in the book was their prenup. All earnings during the marriage he made was his to keep alone which ended up being millions. Joint properties like homes were to be split. However, Belle emptied her trusts to buy the Martha's Vineyard house, Tribeca apartment. She got to keep those homes in the end.

The worst part is not wanting joint custody, specific visitation with the kids. One thing to leave your spouse but your kids?

Of course, she has financial means that makes a softer landing, but the pain of not just the abandonment of her but the kids was very sad to read.

How big did her trust end up being? The prenup was very generous to him unless her separate property ended up being a lot, if she was foolish enough to let the real estate that she paid 100% for become joint. OTOH I also read that grandparents paid for college and private school so the kids aren’t hurting. I *hope* the prenup waiver spousal support for him since he got to keep all his earnings … but then again it would have waived spousal support for her too if that is the case. All comes down to whether her trusts were significant enough to warrant letting him keep his earnings, and if she was smart about how she used her trust money for purchases during the marriage.

[Anonymous]

She alludes to his leaving just as he made it really big time in his career, so it looks like he had been quietly planning and placed the cherry on top with an exit affair.