Shared immigration status

[Anonymous]

My in laws are very maga and their beliefs on immigration are hard and have been hard. There is no grey area for them.

I was brought here as a baby and didn't have a say. When I was 19 I got a Visa working with a local women's center. That granted me a green card and I am still not a citizen but I can file for an adjustment now.

We have a fam chat and recently they were praising ice and I sent a message saying that I'm not a us citizen and I haven't always had a green card, not my choice and my reality was very different and I'd love to have a conversation with the. If they are open.

No answer. Crickets. Not even an acknowledgement of that text and we haven't heard from them since. My sil also hasn't heard from them. We've been married for 12 years.

Guess that's all it took to be removed from the "family"

[Anonymous]

So that means you are a legal immigrant with a green card. Unless they also want green card holders kicked out?

[Anonymous]

You are not removed. You just rocked their universe, they don't know what to say and they need time to adjust. You are extremely valuable to them, actually, OP. They will see, throughout continued contact with you, that there actually IS a grey area, and that nice people like you can also have varied immigration status. You will be their one "foreign" friend, and they'll be able to tell their circle: "My DIL is actually on a green card, waiting for citizenship, and you'd never guess it - she's so nice and has paid all her taxes."

I have one MAGA friend who told me not to worry - if I had paid all my taxes, I'd be safe from deportation. I told him things aren't so simple and lots of people are being detained for very petty reasons, like running a red light one time 20 years ago. He looked very uncomfortable. This is how you change minds, little by little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So that means you are a legal immigrant with a green card. Unless they also want green card holders kicked out?

I honestly don't know. I fear they think we married for citizenship even though I never went through our marriage. Or maybe they lump me into the people they claim to hate because as a child I was here undocumented and they can't accept that. I'm truly not sure without a conversation with them. I thought we could at least have one not that they would give us the silent treatment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are not removed. You just rocked their universe, they don't know what to say and they need time to adjust. You are extremely valuable to them, actually, OP. They will see, throughout continued contact with you, that there actually IS a grey area, and that nice people like you can also have varied immigration status. You will be their one "foreign" friend, and they'll be able to tell their circle: "My DIL is actually on a green card, waiting for citizenship, and you'd never guess it - she's so nice and has paid all her taxes."

I have one MAGA friend who told me not to worry - if I had paid all my taxes, I'd be safe from deportation. I told him things aren't so simple and lots of people are being detained for very petty reasons, like running a red light one time 20 years ago. He looked very uncomfortable. This is how you change minds, little by little.

Thank you for this response. I truly hope this is possible for us.

[Anonymous]

Omg. That’s awful. I’m sorry.
Please stay safe. Green card is not enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Omg. That’s awful. I’m sorry.
Please stay safe. Green card is not enough.

Thank you. I'm in the process of adjusting now. I know and wish I had done it sooner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So that means you are a legal immigrant with a green card. Unless they also want green card holders kicked out?

I honestly don't know. I fear they think we married for citizenship even though I never went through our marriage. Or maybe they lump me into the people they claim to hate because as a child I was here undocumented and they can't accept that. I'm truly not sure without a conversation with them. I thought we could at least have one not that they would give us the silent treatment

I'm an immigrant myself, a citizen after 20 years, and know immigration laws pretty well. Nobody gets deported for running a red light 20 years ago. This is just nonsense. I support ICE. Fully. I'm sick and tired of illegals sucking up resources just because they can. Your ILs are not picking up your message, because it's confrontational. They don't know immigration laws, just like you don't know immigration laws of say, Bulgaria. Not sure what you want from them? A promise you'll not get deported? They cannot give you that. If you used any resources before becoming a citizen, it may become a problem. They don't know what to say, because no matter what they say, it seems to be a problem for you. It's not their fault you were here undocumented as a child. In most countries, in fact in all I know, and I've lived and had long-term residence in 10 different ones, you'd get kicked out as soon as you're found out. I'm sure you had a better life here than in your home country, or you'd not have arrived here undocumented (and I hate this word, because you sure have documents somewhere). And if you hate it here or think you're entitled to stay no matter what and cannot, you know where your home country is.

[Anonymous]

13:27, you are incredibly naive.

OP, I really like what 12:13 said. I’d add that you should tell them your visa, green card, etc. did NOT come through marriage, in case that thought entered their minds. (Not that it should matter, but to them it might matter.)

What does your spouse say?

[Anonymous]

What did you expect, OP? It sucks but these people would literally be fine seeing you eaten by alligators instead of facing their own wrongheadedness.

I don't know what else to say except, no you know, I guess. Proceed accordingly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So that means you are a legal immigrant with a green card. Unless they also want green card holders kicked out?

I honestly don't know. I fear they think we married for citizenship even though I never went through our marriage. Or maybe they lump me into the people they claim to hate because as a child I was here undocumented and they can't accept that. I'm truly not sure without a conversation with them. I thought we could at least have one not that they would give us the silent treatment

I'm an immigrant myself, a citizen after 20 years, and know immigration laws pretty well. Nobody gets deported for running a red light 20 years ago. This is just nonsense. I support ICE. Fully. I'm sick and tired of illegals sucking up resources just because they can. Your ILs are not picking up your message, because it's confrontational. They don't know immigration laws, just like you don't know immigration laws of say, Bulgaria. Not sure what you want from them? A promise you'll not get deported? They cannot give you that. If you used any resources before becoming a citizen, it may become a problem. They don't know what to say, because no matter what they say, it seems to be a problem for you. It's not their fault you were here undocumented as a child. In most countries, in fact in all I know, and I've lived and had long-term residence in 10 different ones, you'd get kicked out as soon as you're found out. I'm sure you had a better life here than in your home country, or you'd not have arrived here undocumented (and I hate this word, because you sure have documents somewhere). And if you hate it here or think you're entitled to stay no matter what and cannot, you know where your home country is.

That's actually not true. People are getting deported from DUIs in college that occurred in the 1990's. So, you're wrong. But you probably will never admit it, so this is wasted effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So that means you are a legal immigrant with a green card. Unless they also want green card holders kicked out?

I honestly don't know. I fear they think we married for citizenship even though I never went through our marriage. Or maybe they lump me into the people they claim to hate because as a child I was here undocumented and they can't accept that. I'm truly not sure without a conversation with them. I thought we could at least have one not that they would give us the silent treatment

I'm an immigrant myself, a citizen after 20 years, and know immigration laws pretty well. Nobody gets deported for running a red light 20 years ago. This is just nonsense. I support ICE. Fully. I'm sick and tired of illegals sucking up resources just because they can. Your ILs are not picking up your message, because it's confrontational. They don't know immigration laws, just like you don't know immigration laws of say, Bulgaria. Not sure what you want from them? A promise you'll not get deported? They cannot give you that. If you used any resources before becoming a citizen, it may become a problem. They don't know what to say, because no matter what they say, it seems to be a problem for you. It's not their fault you were here undocumented as a child. In most countries, in fact in all I know, and I've lived and had long-term residence in 10 different ones, you'd get kicked out as soon as you're found out. I'm sure you had a better life here than in your home country, or you'd not have arrived here undocumented (and I hate this word, because you sure have documents somewhere). And if you hate it here or think you're entitled to stay no matter what and cannot, you know where your home country is.

That's actually not true. People are getting deported from DUIs in college that occurred in the 1990's. So, you're wrong. But you probably will never admit it, so this is wasted effort.

Do you want to say you're familiar with someone's immigration case? Because I can assure you that you are not. Don't believe what you read in the press. What are you trying to prove here? Nobody cares whether I'm wrong or right, it doesn't matter and there's nothing for me to admit. You sound ridiculous. Only your own immigration case matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:13:27, you are incredibly naive.

OP, I really like what 12:13 said. I’d add that you should tell them your visa, green card, etc. did NOT come through marriage, in case that thought entered their minds. (Not that it should matter, but to them it might matter.)

What does your spouse say?

Sorry to tell you, but I've been dealing with immigration law for 20+ years. What about you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are not removed. You just rocked their universe, they don't know what to say and they need time to adjust. You are extremely valuable to them, actually, OP. They will see, throughout continued contact with you, that there actually IS a grey area, and that nice people like you can also have varied immigration status. You will be their one "foreign" friend, and they'll be able to tell their circle: "My DIL is actually on a green card, waiting for citizenship, and you'd never guess it - she's so nice and has paid all her taxes."

I have one MAGA friend who told me not to worry - if I had paid all my taxes, I'd be safe from deportation. I told him things aren't so simple and lots of people are being detained for very petty reasons, like running a red light one time 20 years ago. He looked very uncomfortable. This is how you change minds, little by little.

And to make it clear to you, you have to admit when applying for citizenship if you had any trouble with law. Sometimes there are time limits. You sign by saying all your statements are truthful.

[Anonymous]

Reality is they’re old and someday they’re gonna need your help and when they do, you’re gonna tell them they should pull themselves up by their boot straps and that you would like to help them, but that’s socialism.