Indulge my fantasy - top private vs. Walls

[Anonymous]

I posted this on the private school board but got a good suggestion to also post here to get all perspectives so here we go:

Play along with my total fantasy scenario here: let's imagine my 8th grade DD gets into Sidwell or GDS and also Walls. I think she'd be happy at any of them. She's tough as nails, entirely self-motivated, deeply curious, very smart. Has been happy and successful in DCPS. I, however, am exhausted by DCPS - the nonstop advocacy, feeling like parents have to hold it all up bc it's so chaotic and funding always in jeopardy, issues with staffing and facilities, always wondering if we will lose a teacher or a section, not get a sub, get subjected to a crappy online curriculum. Walls may be protected from some of that, but it's still DCPS. We *can* afford private but we make too much to qualify for aid ($400k) so it will be a stretch. We will have to cut other things like vacations. We won't be doing all the tutoring and extra fancy stuff other kids do like get college essay consultants and marketing people to help develop a podcast or whatever latest thing is the "hook" to get "unhooked" kids into college. Sigh. So, in this totally fantasy scenario...what would you do? She will be ok anywhere because she's that kind of kid. She will be more challenged - I think - at a Sidwell or a GDS and I would be relieved to step back. But I would be trading that relief for financial stress. And the crazy social and status stuff that comes with private school. Thanks for indulging me in this fantasy world.

[Anonymous]

Since you think she'll be fine at any of them and you are ok paying for private, have her apply and then let her choose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since you think she'll be fine at any of them and you are ok paying for private, have her apply and then let her choose.

I'm the PP. I have a friend who was in a similar position with her child. They would be happy with Walls, not with JR (zoned school) and they were able/willing to pay for a top private. The kid ending up getting into a top private but waitlisted at Walls. Parents paid the deposit at the private. Eventually they got off the waitlist at Walls and the kid said that's where they wanted to go after the visit.

[Anonymous]

Fwiw, my kid is at GDS and we do none of the things you mention. Your income will not make her stick out.

We also came from GDS. I can only compare to our local ES and MS, but the curriculum is much, much deeper and more interesting. And I haven't had to do any advocating and haven't had any conversations with teachers other than parent teacher conferences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Fwiw, my kid is at GDS and we do none of the things you mention. Your income will not make her stick out.

We also came from GDS. I can only compare to our local ES and MS, but the curriculum is much, much deeper and more interesting. And I haven't had to do any advocating and haven't had any conversations with teachers other than parent teacher conferences.

I meant, we came from dcps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Fwiw, my kid is at GDS and we do none of the things you mention. Your income will not make her stick out.

We also came from GDS. I can only compare to our local ES and MS, but the curriculum is much, much deeper and more interesting. And I haven't had to do any advocating and haven't had any conversations with teachers other than parent teacher conferences.

No, you haven't had to "advocate" because you wrote out big fat checks every year. Pick your poison.

[Anonymous]

Personally, I would not stretch to send a girl to an expensive private, because of my own experience being the girl whose parents were stretching to afford the expensive private (not in DC). The entire social world seemed to run on a subtle code of brands, hairstyles, etc., that I couldn’t understand or afford. And the rich kids were not as academic as I had been led to expect. I was quite unhappy.

[Anonymous]

For a high-performing, self-motivated kid, I would never make the types of financial sacrifices you're talking about to send them to private if they would be happy in public. Absolute no-brainer to me.

[Anonymous]

^^^also I’ve had two high-performing, self-motivated kids go through JR very happily and successfully, so I’m speaking from a DCPS context.

[Anonymous]

I have heard about the problems you describe in DCPS, but haven't personally seen then, and they don't concern my kids at all.
Older kid started college with 30 credits, has 4.0 GPA, and is already working at age 18.
Bright kids need school to stay out of their schooling. DCPS is perfect for it.

[Anonymous]

You can afford Sidwell. Choose Sidwell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Personally, I would not stretch to send a girl to an expensive private, because of my own experience being the girl whose parents were stretching to afford the expensive private (not in DC). The entire social world seemed to run on a subtle code of brands, hairstyles, etc., that I couldn’t understand or afford. And the rich kids were not as academic as I had been led to expect. I was quite unhappy.

Which school?
I'm going to guess Holton.

[Anonymous]

We have had friends in this position. Those who were on the cusp of being able to easily afford it and who involved their child in the decision (school tours, interviews, etc) ended up in private. I think once the kids really got a taste for private school they said they were unimpressd with what they saw of Walls.

But i do agree the cultures are going to be really different. the curriculum is going to be more challenging at GDS or Sidwell, but the student body at Walls is going to be smarter. College placements are close. College readiness better at GDS or Sidwell, but I think at Walls they are ready enough. I have friends who went through Sidwell years ago who still feel burned out from the workload.

And The median income at GDS is $1 million. That comes with a host of cultural aspects that you either like or dont.

[Anonymous]

Nobody wants to indulge your fantasy about wasting $200k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can afford Sidwell. Choose Sidwell.

+1. If given the choice, Sidwell is the only DC private I’d choose over Walls. I just don’t think the others are worth the hefty tuition (and barely even Sidwell). My child attends Walls, and it’s far from perfect. However, it’s free and it gets the job done (decent college prep education with minimal student behavioral problems).