Jealous of a friends’ kids’ extracurricular

[Anonymous]

Our kids are bilingual and take our home in high school at one level higher than most peers and are doing well. Our friends, also with bilingual kids, enrolled their children in a Saturday language school, where the kids get what is essentially a second high school diploma from the home country. This has allowed their children to take a different language in school, meaning their kids are trilingual and they have a truly impressive extracurricular that shows commitment (the language school is intense) and has shaped their children’s entire narrative (the kid volunteered for a summer in the home country, has an internship next summer with an developing markets investment firm focusing on a part of the world using our language, etc.

I’m just kicking myself because if I had thought through this 10 years ago, I feel my child would be in a much better position college application wise. These friends had asked if we would be interested in doing the Saturday school with them, but it conflicted with sports and travel and our kid plays hs soccer but certainly isn’t going to get recruited.

Just a vent, but feeling like my past self let my high schooler down.

[Anonymous]

One way to look at it is if both your kids had done the same thing they'd probably worsen each other's chances if they applied to the same colleges. Because then both would have been less unique.

Also your kids did get more breathing room to be kids. So many kids and adults are mentally unhealthy now. I think it's best to start life with a little less pressure. It's an endurance race.

[Anonymous]

Im not a sports parent at all but I'll bet you kid got just what they needed from the sports they did. That was the right path for them.

Saturday school can suck for some kids

[Anonymous]

Do you think your child would have enjoyed intense Saturday language school more than sports and travel?

I would think about the issue from that perspective alone.

[Anonymous]

Land your helicopter.

[Anonymous]

Jealously is the thief of joy.

[Anonymous]

Parents like you are the worst.

[Anonymous]

Them's the breaks. That was excellent strategic planning on the part of your friend, but agree with PPs you need to focus on the positive at this point. If your kid was doing the EC that gave them actual joy, and can be continued at the club level in college, that's great in a different way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents like you are the worst.

IDK---I think it's slightly worse to actually send your kids to an extra day of school every week other than be sad later that you didn't.

[Anonymous]

I don't think Saturday language school is impressive at all. Very common and shows kids didn't choose their own activities.

[Anonymous]

Sure it’s work, but not unique. Kids of certain demographics being put in Saturday language school and doing projects in “home country” is pretty common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One way to look at it is if both your kids had done the same thing they'd probably worsen each other's chances if they applied to the same colleges. Because then both would have been less unique.

Also your kids did get more breathing room to be kids. So many kids and adults are mentally unhealthy now. I think it's best to start life with a little less pressure. It's an endurance race.

Well, pressure is better than ruminating. Nice dig at the other family, but so far the OP looks like an unhealthy one.

[Anonymous]

No kids are becoming fluent just from taking a language in school. They are not Trilingual with high school French or Spanish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sure it’s work, but not unique. Kids of certain demographics being put in Saturday language school and doing projects in “home country” is pretty common.

I think it’s pretty unique for non-Asian countries, which this is. And the ability to have documented (by grades and AP tests) trilinguality is impressive. And my comment about doing projects in the home country wasn’t that it was unique, just that it was a perfectly formed puzzle piece in a very well curated narrative that looks more organic because this language school was started when the children were 4.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No kids are becoming fluent just from taking a language in school. They are not Trilingual with high school French or Spanish.

They are if they are already fluent in another romance language. A spinner speaker becoming fluent in Italian is not particularly difficult.