Child might appear privledged on paper

[Anonymous]

...but has overcome a lot. We live in the richest city in this area. I raised my child as a single Mom and we've both had to survive the instability of Dad who is a repeat-offender, convicted abuser. Add to that that child was diagnosed with a chronic, incompatible-with-life disease at a young age. So everything child has accomplished comes with all that baggage.

Apparently I did a really good job because child does not recognize any of this as challenges that have been overcome. Child has always just excelled and never gives it a second thought. So would absolutely never consider discussing this in an essay.

What would your thoughts be? Child isn't just some rich kid but absolutely might come off as that based simply on geography.

[Anonymous]

What disease is incompatible with life but yet the host lives to 18+ and can attend college??

[Anonymous]

If they have excelled then let them continue to excel and do it their way. Don’t write their story for them in life if they are doing a good job on their own! The goal is not to have a kid need you to tell them how to do everything.

[Anonymous]

Be grateful your child did not see the obstacles you saw, and he was able to thrive. You did great!

[Anonymous]

It's a blessing that child excels without recognizing all the challenges.

I don't care what the child might appear on paper. It's not important. Period.

[Anonymous]

It's a myth that colleges want poor kids with screwed up lives.

They want mentally well adjusted kids who are prepared for college and can afford tuition. if that's how your daughter appears on paper, let them think that

[Anonymous]

A lot of us have had to overcome obstacles, OP, even when living in luxury zip codes. My youngest is in high school and was diagnosed with a serious autoimmune disease. She has led a comfortable life and doesn't remember any of our lean years, including the time we had to uproot ourselves and live with my BIL for a while. Her older sibling has mental health issues that were the center of our attention for his first 18 years of life.

So no, she's not going to talk about hardship in any essay. That would be offensive to good taste and to those who have greater challenges. She's going to talk about what defines her, and it's not her illness that defines her. It's all the good things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a myth that colleges want poor kids with screwed up lives.

They want mentally well adjusted kids who are prepared for college and can afford tuition. if that's how your daughter appears on paper, let them think that

I agree with you in theory, but they want *diversity* and if this appears to be a rich white kid they might put them at the bottom of the list. Or maybe the endowments will be hurting by then and it helps? Who knows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What disease is incompatible with life but yet the host lives to 18+ and can attend college??

You've never met someone with type I diabetes have you? Make a mistake with insulin and you're dead pretty quick. Lots of people live with diseases like that.

[Anonymous]

He may view other things as obstacles that you've never noticed. Not everyone writes about hardships that are big in their lives. It might be having a friend overdose, or losing friends bc they want to party and you don't, or struggling and then persevering at learning something everyone else seemed to grasp quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a myth that colleges want poor kids with screwed up lives.

They want mentally well adjusted kids who are prepared for college and can afford tuition. if that's how your daughter appears on paper, let them think that

I agree with you in theory, but they want *diversity* and if this appears to be a rich white kid they might put them at the bottom of the list. Or maybe the endowments will be hurting by then and it helps? Who knows.

No. That is a myth. They like rich kids who are mentally stable and won't need tutoring, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What disease is incompatible with life but yet the host lives to 18+ and can attend college??

You've never met someone with type I diabetes have you? Make a mistake with insulin and you're dead pretty quick. Lots of people live with diseases like that.

There are over 50,000 students in college with Type 1 diabetes. You should be pleased your child sees themselves as resilient and wants to stay positive.

There are plenty of student in the same position except they live in the poorest cities in America. They would probably trade places in a heartbeat. It isn't a woe-is-me extra points competition to get into college.

[Anonymous]

We were the “poorest” in an ultra wealthy zip code too. Renters. Making as much all year as half the people in the zip code made in a month.

In hindsight, it was a bad decision. I think it hurt my kid’s law school admits. Kid was likely assumed to be wealthy, connected, and all the privileges in the world. Not the case.

Sorry, OP. I don’t have an answer. Just empathizing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a myth that colleges want poor kids with screwed up lives.

They want mentally well adjusted kids who are prepared for college and can afford tuition. if that's how your daughter appears on paper, let them think that

I agree with you in theory, but they want *diversity* and if this appears to be a rich white kid they might put them at the bottom of the list. Or maybe the endowments will be hurting by then and it helps? Who knows.

They only want a certain type of diversity. They want racial and socioeconomic diversity. They don’t want kids with medical disabilities or kids who may be troubled because those kids may be hard for a college to accommodate.

My kid with medical issues didn’t mention any of them on their application for that reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What disease is incompatible with life but yet the host lives to 18+ and can attend college??

You've never met someone with type I diabetes have you? Make a mistake with insulin and you're dead pretty quick. Lots of people live with diseases like that.

Type 1 was my first thought too. Without ongoing insulin, it's fatal fast.

OP, your kid sounds fantastic. A ton of great colleges will want her. Trust that that fantastic person she is will shine through. (It will.)