Parents who fawn over their kids

[Anonymous]

I've been amazed by this, especially one parent who has said, "she was such a gift to be around," "we were so luckily to have been able to raise her...," basically acting the the kid was the second coming of Christ. I get that parents miss their kids, but does anyone else find this a bit much?

[Anonymous]

In what context are people saying this? I feel differently about it if it's a social media post versus a speech at a kid's graduation party.

In general I think it's weird when people are very gushing towards anyone on social media. I think it's the wrong setting. Just tone it down a little. Save the gushing for a family dinner or a special event.

[Anonymous]

What does this have to do with the college forum?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been amazed by this, especially one parent who has said, "she was such a gift to be around," "we were so luckily to have been able to raise her...," basically acting the the kid was the second coming of Christ. I get that parents miss their kids, but does anyone else find this a bit much?

I think it's ok to speak of family members and your children in loving terms.

So much better than to be treated with indifference or passive aggressive put-downs that I witnessed far too often in my own life. The kids being "fawned over" are very lucky IMO.

[Anonymous]

I was raised in an emotionally abusive home where my parents were actively cruel to us, and I am completely wigged out by the people who gush over their kids. Always have been. At some point I figured out that it was because: I was jealous of these kids since no one ever gushed about me, and also I assumed the parents were lying and being insincere. In short, my discomfort with the gushing parents was probably more about me and what I had experienced then about them. I've worked through some of it. OP might look at what is triggerin these feelings in her. It was kind of shocking to realize that there are actually people who think their kids are amazing and all the things. Personally, I am realizing that it's okay to gush about and to my kids sometimes .It won't actually hurt them or make them soft.

[Anonymous]

The mom of the Charlie Kirk shooter sure fawned over him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was raised in an emotionally abusive home where my parents were actively cruel to us, and I am completely wigged out by the people who gush over their kids. Always have been. At some point I figured out that it was because: I was jealous of these kids since no one ever gushed about me, and also I assumed the parents were lying and being insincere. In short, my discomfort with the gushing parents was probably more about me and what I had experienced then about them. I've worked through some of it. OP might look at what is triggerin these feelings in her. It was kind of shocking to realize that there are actually people who think their kids are amazing and all the things. Personally, I am realizing that it's okay to gush about and to my kids sometimes .It won't actually hurt them or make them soft.

Intersting. I don't disagree with what you wrote here, but have a slightly different take.

I also grew up in an emotional abusive home full of criticism, cruelty, and sarcasm never kind words or praise. When I see people praising their kids in a very earnest way, it often provokes a sense of longing in me, and sadness that I have never experienced that and never will.

I am now a parent and praise my kids a lot, tell them how much I love them, can fawn over them sometimes. But I rarely do it in public because I don't want to cause pain to other people the way I experienced it. I think there are some public settings where that's appropriate and even if it triggered someone, it's reasonable, but I don't just spontaneously sing my kid's praises wherever I go because I know not everyone has that kind of loving, supportive home, and there are other ways to convey that to my kid without potentially causing someone else pain

It's the same reason that while I love my spouse and tell him that regularly, I don't walk around telling everyone I know what a great husband he is and highlighting all the great stuff he does, because of course not everyone has that and doesn't need to hear that all the time.

[Anonymous]

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder!"

Parents are spiraling and say stuff like this because they are out of touch with reality OR want to get attention.

Please get over yourself parents.

[Anonymous]

Oh no someone loves their kid?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh no someone loves their kid?!

It's DCUM. You know that's the cardinal sin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been amazed by this, especially one parent who has said, "she was such a gift to be around," "we were so luckily to have been able to raise her...," basically acting the the kid was the second coming of Christ. I get that parents miss their kids, but does anyone else find this a bit much?

Never noticed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been amazed by this, especially one parent who has said, "she was such a gift to be around," "we were so luckily to have been able to raise her...," basically acting the the kid was the second coming of Christ. I get that parents miss their kids, but does anyone else find this a bit much?

I don’t know anyone who speaks like this. Maybe you have weird friends, OP?

[Anonymous]

I agree that there are some over the top posts. I guess their kid is just perfect like that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree that there are some over the top posts. I guess their kid is just perfect like that!

I think OP was talking about friends. OP didn’t say posting.

[Anonymous]

I feel that way about one of my children, but I never say it out loud to strangers, because what I'm actually doing is comparing her with her special needs brother who took all our energy to raise to a semi-functional adult state.

Also, this same kid has a serious chronic disease that will get worse with age. I sometimes feel so appreciative of her good traits because she might suffer a lot in her life and not live up to her potential.

But I don't express it in those terms, OP. I think that would be a little crass. I praise each of my children in private, for all the joy they've brought to me, and the obstacles they've bravely surmounted.