Discovered niece has a lewd instagram. Tell her parents?

[Anonymous]

It’s possible her parents already know, I have no clue. Randomly saw like a recommended profile on my daughter’s instagram and it was her 17 year old cousin. Every photo is her boobs and butt out. It’s so disturbing. It’s an open profile and I guess it’s separate from her other profile my daughter and me are linked to.

[Anonymous]

I can tell you don't get out much. A LOT of older teens do this, and their parents know (and sometimes encourage). There are entire families out there who are addicted to, and proud of, the attention their daughters receive online, even though they know very well who's watching.

[Anonymous]

Probably should just mind your own business. This child's parents could be fully aware or not.

Maybe revisit social media rules with your own minor age child.

[Anonymous]

I would definitely send it to my sibling and say “hey I just want to make sure you’ve seen this.”

[Anonymous]

I'd want to give the parents a heads up. The thing that's hard is if they already know and have decided not to act, you don't want it to be phrased judgmentally. So I'd probably approach by starting conversation with them about instagram. "Ugh, I hate that my daughter is on instagram now. It's so hard to figure out what limits to set about social media, especially as they're almost adults. What's your approach been?"

That way, you'll be able to get a way better sense of whether they know or would care based on their response. If they say "yeah, at this point we've decided she can use her own judgement on stuff like that, we're staying out of it" then you keep quiet. If they say "Oh, we monitor her instagram very closely, it is a pain" then you can say, "I noticed she had a second account - are you following that one as well?" or something that clues them in without being pushy.

[Anonymous]

Report it to Cps

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Report it to Cps

I'm trying to figure out what you think CPS would do

[Anonymous]

Tell, but anonymously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd want to give the parents a heads up. The thing that's hard is if they already know and have decided not to act, you don't want it to be phrased judgmentally. So I'd probably approach by starting conversation with them about instagram. "Ugh, I hate that my daughter is on instagram now. It's so hard to figure out what limits to set about social media, especially as they're almost adults. What's your approach been?"

That way, you'll be able to get a way better sense of whether they know or would care based on their response. If they say "yeah, at this point we've decided she can use her own judgement on stuff like that, we're staying out of it" then you keep quiet. If they say "Oh, we monitor her instagram very closely, it is a pain" then you can say, "I noticed she had a second account - are you following that one as well?" or something that clues them in without being pushy.

I have a close and honest relationship with my sibling and I can’t even imagine playing games like this.

I would just say “hey, have you seen this?” and if they said “yes,” they would know I would take that as a complete answer and stay out of it.

Because I would stay out of it and let them handle it, but I would also never consider not saying anything if it is reasonable to think they might not know about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would definitely send it to my sibling and say “hey I just want to make sure you’ve seen this.”

That's what I'd do too. If my sibling took the attitude of "yeah they all do it" then I'd say no more. Not my monkey ...

[Anonymous]

I have a niece like this but from DH's side (that matters - I don't have the kind of relationship with in-laws that I do with my own siblings). I am staying out of it, pretending like I never saw it.

[Anonymous]

I think you should start commenting. "Oh wow sweetie, I remember changing your poopy diapers!" or things like that.

She will block you, but she should also know that her family can see these pictures too.

[Anonymous]

I would report to my sibling for sure. The kid is still a minor. Also kids now do not really understand that things posted online on a public account can be seen by anybody and live forever online. A potential employer ten years from now will see it, a future boufriend, future friends when the niece has left the slut phase and embraced the suburban soccer mom identity or just the identity of a mature adult. We all made mistakes and did dumb things when we were teenagers but Internet did not exist (I am 59) and our mistakes and dumb things just disappeared in the past. Now they live forever and can be use many years later against the dumb kid. No reason to be judgmental, OP should say hey i found this my chance, just making sure you know about it and then let the parents deal with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would definitely send it to my sibling and say “hey I just want to make sure you’ve seen this.”

+1

[Anonymous]

I don’t know if this is a lot but it has over 2,000 followers. Her regular locked profile we are linked to is about 400 followers and following.