Emptiness after WW Affair
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Anonymous
| Anyone else experience a lack of feelings after their spouse’s affair? I have anger, but nothing else. Sex is blah, joy is gone, desire for interaction has left me. She is no longer in my thoughts and it has been years, but passion for life has been replaced with a void. I’m thinking about skydiving to maybe feel again, but I don’t really know anyone in a similar situation. |
Anonymous
|
Sir/Ma'am Divorce. |
Anonymous
| WW? |
Anonymous
Work wife, maybe? |
Anonymous
| Wayward Wife. |
Anonymous
| Why not divorce? I mean what’s the point of suffering thru?? |
Anonymous
|
Never had a partner I cared so deeply about. I always knew people cheated and I expected it.
Get out. Life is beautiful without her in it. |
Anonymous
| This is no way to live. Don’t waste your life like this. |
Anonymous
|
I’m assuming you reconciled and did not split up?
It seems your relationship may have improved to the “just bearable” point instead of actually thriving, it’s the trap of good enough when you look at how miserable you might be day-to-day versus throwing away half your money and devastating your children. I totally get it. Your nervous system is fried from betrayal, dopamine is five levels below the basement and you don’t have a memory of ever really being happy. When you try to think back to good times you are likely working in memories from 10 years earlier but everything in the past 18 months is just gray fog, you can’t even remember what you had for lunch yesterday. You may have heard a long list of excuses for her behavior, maybe you even took some responsibility for her actions, now you don’t respect her and worse you don’t respect yourself. You may still be playing out the revenge fantasies in the shower when your eyes are closed, laying down that one zinger before you slam the door and walk out forever, maybe it’s an elaborate system to vacuum all the money out of the accounts at the same time then revealing all the evidence of her betrayal to her family, you’d love to pull off some sort of Shawshank revenge but you can’t plan more than a few hours in advance. I did it all and then I came to the truth, the truth of who I was that I alone had steered to that place in life were the one I trusted the most betrayed me and I despised who I saw. Over two years I changed everything, took my power back, refused to live in any sort of delusion only 100% truth. There was no revenge, I didn’t f&$k her best friend, I tore myself apart and rebuilt from the ground up. She can’t be hurt me again, there’s nothing she can say or do to get a rise out of me, she has become a minor tangential character in the second chapter of my life. I can’t tell you how to fix what you’re in, you’ll need to find it on your own and when you do the sky will be the limit. |
Anonymous
Sounds like the poster is suffering long after the divorce. |
Anonymous
| It happened over a decade ago and I stayed for the kids. She finally admitted everything 3 years ago and we divorced. When I lost my family, I think it just tore everything apart. My life is fine from the outside, but I am still dead inside. I don’t miss her, but I do miss having my kids and a family. It’s a numb feeling where I do life, but don’t desire it. |
Anonymous
Weight Watchers? |
Anonymous
so sad. this is what I fear my kids will think about life after their dad abandoned us for a mistress. I grew up in a healthy home with secure attachments to my family and a true belief and conviction that marriage was a commitment forever. It was nice to have complete trust in people. Very sadly, my husband destroyed safety, trust and security for me and our kids for life. Even our friends are shaken by his betrayal. Adultery/affair/abandonment is one of the worst things in life you can do to a family |
Anonymous
I'm so sorry and I commiserate. I too was betrayed and now feel empty. I wish there was a dating app ONLY for those who were betrayed, and widowed. Because, great quality people who live a good honorable life with values deserve to find each other and build goodness again. |
Anonymous
Dump the whole**e king. Plenty of other women who will be loyal to youm. Let her have some else. She has proven that her vagina doesn't have a lock anyways so run my man |