daycare vs nanny share

[Anonymous]

We are weighing options and curious about pros vs cons. Cost is the obvious consideration. What about reliability? Other factors to consider? We are two working parents w demanding jobs outside the home; baby would be about 4 months.

[Anonymous]

Nanny share until kid is 3 then daycare. Vet families carefully. Have it in the contract that care is still provided to you if the other child is sick.
Fewer kids early on is so much easier on the immune system, less drop off and pickup management etc.

[Anonymous]

Nanny or nanny share. keep your life easy - the kids can spend more times outside, less time sick, more time sleeping with nanny share vs in daycare. Way less stress for you as you only have to get yourselves ready in the am.

[Anonymous]

Another vote for nanny share. Yes, nannies get sick and go on vacation and quit, but daycare has professional development days, are closed for more holidays, and most of all, your kid will be sick ALL the time. You will lose your minds with all the sick time.

The other big consideration for me was nap quality. My kid napped in his room (or in his own space when another family hosted) every day - big long naps in a nice, blackout dark room with a noise machine, and on a schedule that worked for him (within reason, you do need to be compatible with the other family).

Most daycare kids have to nap in way less than ideal situations, and while most adjust, I don’t think they’re getting as much quality sleep, and that’s important to me.

[Anonymous]

Daycare. DC area daycares are really high quality and comparable to nanny shares. My daughter takes two hour naps there everyday. They are open almost all year. Very few holidays. No teacher turn over. It’s expensive but worth it. She’s been there since 11 weeks. Don’t let the daycare naysayers get you. I really feel like Nannies are for SAHMs and daycares are for professionals. Nannies are a lot of work to manage and can quit and leave you without childcare for a prolonged period.

[Anonymous]

We’ve been really happy with our daycare. I feel like our kids have benefitted from the structure and routines. When they were little daycare was great at getting them on a reliable nap and feeding schedule, and now that they are older they do art, stories, music, etc, usually focused on a weekly theme. Having peer role models has been especially important for my child with special needs.

The downside is that yes, the kids do get sick a lot in daycare, particularly the first couple months. And because daycare is extra cautious, they will often call to have the child picked up if they seem the least bit sick, and then have pretty strict rules about how long they must stay out. So you still need to have at least one flexible parent who can cover those sick days.

I’m sure nanny shares can also be a good option. It just felt like too much to coordinate for me. I didn’t want to negotiate with another family or supervise anyone. Plus my husband works from home and didn’t think he’d be able to concentrate with the kids around, so we would have to be comfortable leaving our kids at someone else’s house. All in all, daycare was the best choice for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daycare. DC area daycares are really high quality and comparable to nanny shares. My daughter takes two hour naps there everyday. They are open almost all year. Very few holidays. No teacher turn over. It’s expensive but worth it. She’s been there since 11 weeks. Don’t let the daycare naysayers get you. I really feel like Nannies are for SAHMs and daycares are for professionals. Nannies are a lot of work to manage and can quit and leave you without childcare for a prolonged period.

We’re a dual working family. We tried daycare, au pair, nanny. The nanny is the best and most expensive option. Daycares are ok if you don’t have the money for the nanny but don’t think it’s better. Between sickness and problem kids, the savings aren’t worth it for us.

[Anonymous]

If you work from home a lot then it is really nice to have the kids be somewhere else.

Nanny shares are not regulated, daycares are. If the other family hosts, you are essentially using an unlicensed daycare.

Having a nanny means child will have to transition to preschool/school later at some point. At 4 months, baby won't really have separation anxiety and will likely adjust quickly to daycare. We used a daycare with a preschool program from 5 months to 5 years old and felt the consistency really helped DC. It was a small daycare center. DC is now in kindergarten and had zero issues adjusting.

But if you feel confident vetting and managing the nanny and the other family and you aren't concerned about kids being home while you work, give it a try. If you are the host family you avoid the daycare drop off and pick up hassle which can easily add 1-2 hours to your commute.

[Anonymous]

Our daughter has gone to daycare since 7 months old. We got lucky and have had very few sick days in 2 years. She must have a great immune system and I know most are not as fortunate. That being said, we would pick daycare again even if she was sick more frequently. The routine/structure is great for her and she naps 2 hours/day there every day. She gets plenty of outdoor time, does fun activities that we don’t have to plan in advance and set up for (like getting art supplies), plays with toys that we don’t have at home (play kitchen, costumes), and plays with her peers all day. I also appreciate dealing with a business as a paying customer, versus having to be an employer/manage another person. Yes there is less control but I think it’s less stressful, and we’ve been very happy with the quality of the care she’s getting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daycare. DC area daycares are really high quality and comparable to nanny shares. My daughter takes two hour naps there everyday. They are open almost all year. Very few holidays. No teacher turn over. It’s expensive but worth it. She’s been there since 11 weeks. Don’t let the daycare naysayers get you. I really feel like Nannies are for SAHMs and daycares are for professionals. Nannies are a lot of work to manage and can quit and leave you without childcare for a prolonged period.

We’re a dual working family. We tried daycare, au pair, nanny. The nanny is the best and most expensive option. Daycares are ok if you don’t have the money for the nanny but don’t think it’s better. Between sickness and problem kids, the savings aren’t worth it for us.

Agree.

[Anonymous]

I don't know if you can generalize. It really depends on what your needs are. In general nannies are more expensive and have the potential to be more attuned to your individual child's needs, which obviously can be great.

That said, anyone who regularly visits parks on weekdays can attest to having witnessed some pretty checked out nannies. Daycares are more regulated, at least in this area. They might also be a better fit if you are not comfortable managing a household employee -- which I personally really, really am not (trial and error and I learned this).

Nanny shares can have their own complications. To be honest I was looking for one for my boy when he was a toddler and I ended up feeling that I couldn't trust a nanny with him and another kid on the playground at that age. But he was a very rambunctious, daredevil toddler and this was when he was about 18 months -- for me, one of the scariest ages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know if you can generalize. It really depends on what your needs are. In general nannies are more expensive and have the potential to be more attuned to your individual child's needs, which obviously can be great.

That said, anyone who regularly visits parks on weekdays can attest to having witnessed some pretty checked out nannies. Daycares are more regulated, at least in this area. They might also be a better fit if you are not comfortable managing a household employee -- which I personally really, really am not (trial and error and I learned this).

Nanny shares can have their own complications. To be honest I was looking for one for my boy when he was a toddler and I ended up feeling that I couldn't trust a nanny with him and another kid on the playground at that age. But he was a very rambunctious, daredevil toddler and this was when he was about 18 months -- for me, one of the scariest ages.

But to be clear, nannies can be absolutely fabulous. There are a couple I know now (who care for friends' children) who are absolute gems.

[Anonymous]

I’ve done both and if I could do it over, I would have put my first baby in a nanny share instead of daycare at 3 months. He’s 5 now and fine. A good nanny is hands down better than a daycare, but most nannies aren’t very good.

[Anonymous]

We have two kids. For our first, from 0-2 we had a nanny share and it was just a lot of logistics and really a pain in the butt. We much preferred the small in home daycare we used for our second. For both kids at age 2, we put them in a full-day preschool (similar to a daycare center, but it started at age 2). So I feel like we had all three experiences and we loved the in home daycare and the small preschool so much better than nanny share. I would never recommend nanny shares to anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daycare. DC area daycares are really high quality and comparable to nanny shares. My daughter takes two hour naps there everyday. They are open almost all year. Very few holidays. No teacher turn over. It’s expensive but worth it. She’s been there since 11 weeks. Don’t let the daycare naysayers get you. I really feel like Nannies are for SAHMs and daycares are for professionals. Nannies are a lot of work to manage and can quit and leave you without childcare for a prolonged period.

We’re a dual working family. We tried daycare, au pair, nanny. The nanny is the best and most expensive option. Daycares are ok if you don’t have the money for the nanny but don’t think it’s better. Between sickness and problem kids, the savings aren’t worth it for us.

There's a big difference between having your own nanny and a nanny share. Personally, we found the small in home daycare (2 adults and 5 children) to be the best option for our family. We found an amazing caretaker and her mom and they treated us like family. We're still in touch and our kids have outgrown babysitters!