Starting over and feeling defeated

[Anonymous]

I’m 36 and broke up with my boyfriend a week ago. I was in school while we met and quit because he wanted to be the provider. Now I’m 36 and starting over from scratch. My current job pays barely nothing ( $52k) and I’m going to be stretched thin financially. I feel like such a loser starting over at my age. The likelihood of me finding a husband in my situation is pretty low. I feel defeated.

[Anonymous]

What do you need a husband for?

[Anonymous]

52K isn't terrible. I'm 38 and have friends who were single at 36 who are now on their way to getting engaged. So its not the end of the line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you need a husband for?

Money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you need a husband for?

Money.

I'm assuming that you're not a troll but I am probably wrong.

A man is not a plan. Increase your employability and earning capacity.

[Anonymous]

Why caused you to shift your life so dramatically (quit school) for a mere boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

You tagged out of your future because you were dating a “provider”? Go back to school, fix your career and finances, if you meet someone in the meantime, great. If not, great - set yourself up for a life where you don’t need to rely on someone else.

[Anonymous]

36 is young. Finish school, or go to community college to learn an employable skill. Spend less time on looking for a man and more time on improving your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you need a husband for?

I don’t want to be alone forever. I want a partner in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why caused you to shift your life so dramatically (quit school) for a mere boyfriend?

I stupidly believed his lies and fell in love. I had a difficult time with school and a family issue. He told me to quit because he was okay with being the provider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You tagged out of your future because you were dating a “provider”? Go back to school, fix your career and finances, if you meet someone in the meantime, great. If not, great - set yourself up for a life where you don’t need to rely on someone else.

It’s a little more complicated than that. I was having some issues with a family member and that was very challenging with going to school. Leaving school let me to focus on the family member.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you need a husband for?

Money.

I'm assuming that you're not a troll but I am probably wrong.

A man is not a plan. Increase your employability and earning capacity.

I didn’t write the money part. Some dumb troll did. I want a husband because I don’t want to be alone. I want a partner in life. Maybe 1-2 kids but that ship has probably sailed given my age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:52K isn't terrible. I'm 38 and have friends who were single at 36 who are now on their way to getting engaged. So its not the end of the line.

Really?

I was making that at my first real job at 24 in 1996. For a year- until I leveled up. It was hardly any money 30 years ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:52K isn't terrible. I'm 38 and have friends who were single at 36 who are now on their way to getting engaged. So its not the end of the line.

Really?

I was making that at my first real job at 24 in 1996. For a year- until I leveled up. It was hardly any money 30 years ago.

Many Americans make that salary as an average salary. Get with reality.

[Anonymous]

It’s not too late to meet a partner and have kids. Take a few days to mourn the loss of what you thought your life would be. Make a list of what you want…partner, kids, education, well paying career and education. Go forward in pursuit of these things. Make this your job, don’t look back. Starting over can be scary but embrace it.