Have you known a woman who develops a literal nonstop-stop talking trait in mid life?

[Anonymous]

If so, did she later get diagnosed with dementia? Years later I mean.

I have a relative who has morphed from an outgoing‘bubbly’ big personality type into a middle aged woman who must always be talking whenever in the presence of others* Literally always - I began timing her today, and the longest she was able to maintain a silence after uttering her last word was 8 seconds. The mean interval of silence was 4 seconds

Someone is sure to point out that I’m being a beech for privately and silently clocking my relative’s babble. But think about what I just wrote. Being unable to maintain silence for more than four seconds is pretty astounding, and I think it reaches the level of pathology.

There are a few other contextual circumstances that make me wonder if this might be the very very earliest symptoms of a dementia type neurological problem. We’re not close enough that I could suggest that she get a neurological work up and she would listen to me. So I’m just curious. Anyone reading this know someone like this ? What were they like at 75?

* I have observed that when there’s absolutely no one else that she can talk at, she will obsessively scroll social media on her phone in silence.

[Anonymous]

She sounds as if her anxiety disorder is out of control. It may not lead to early onset dementia necessarily. As for normal dementia, honestly OP, a LOT of people will have that if they live long enough.

But what she has NOW is anxiety. She needs treatment for it. She's probably always had it, but previously she was able to keep it under control, as a "bubbly" sort of person. She may even realize she's like this, but she cannot control herself. What she needs is anxiety meds and therapy. Perhaps you could reach out to someone who is close enough to tell her this.

[Anonymous]

Not dementia, ADHD and co-morbid anxiety.
Perimenopause and menopause can be hell for ADHD. The hormonal fluctuations, particularly the decline in estrogen causes symptoms to worsen.

Estrogen plays a role in regulating neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin, which are important for attention, focus, and emotional regulation. As estrogen levels fluctuate during perimenopause, these neurotransmitters can be affected, potentially leading to increased challenges with inattention, impulsivity, and other ADHD symptoms.

[Anonymous]

My mother in law but she was diagnosed bipolar.

[Anonymous]

It's true that bipolar disorder patients in their manic phase can have non-stop talking. My FIL was like this at our wedding. Do you know her well enough to know whether her current state has been a gradual progression, or if she's had periods of sadness and withdrawal?

[Anonymous]

It sounds like pressured speech. Which is most often seen in manic patients. They will even follow people around talking, unwilling to let the person go, rambling on about all kinds of esoteric things.

[Anonymous]

I only know of people with ADHD who do that. There is no way to help them or redirect them. You can tune them out, walk away, have a short conversation with someone else and come back and they will still be talking like you never left.

[Anonymous]

It's almost a meme that older women become talk-a-holics and prattle on and on vocalizing every thought that comes in their head, and getting angry often if you bring it to their attention.

Men often tend to go the opposite direction and get quieter and quieter as they get older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like pressured speech. Which is most often seen in manic patients. They will even follow people around talking, unwilling to let the person go, rambling on about all kinds of esoteric things.

My dad was like this later in life. Prone to swinging between mania and depression. Definitely prone to non-stop talking in his manic days.

[Anonymous]

I sat behind someone like this on a shuttle bus. OMG longest 10 min of my life bc I wanted to scream SHUT UP its too damn early for this incessant noise. I felt so bad for the dude next to her.

[Anonymous]

In middle age no? My mother became like this in her 70s and it got worse. You cannot get a word in edge wise and she is very intense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In middle age no? My mother became like this in her 70s and it got worse. You cannot get a word in edge wise and she is very intense.

I’m so sorry.

[Anonymous]

Oh man, I’m kind of like this in menopause. Well, not THAT bad but I have an almost compulsive need to verbalize the things that are causing me stress. I’m only like that at home with my family, so I can control it but I’m sure it annoys the F out of them. I likely do have undiagnosed ADD.

I’m really trying to work on it. I’m very aware of it, unlike your relative and thankfully, I’m also a good listener and can be quiet for long stretches - this is very intermittent, during periods of high stress.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for all your thoughtful replies. They have helped me understand where she might be coming from. I am worried about her but as I said, not close enough to get her help. I do think she has both ADD and anxiety. She was not like this 10, 20 years ago though and it's the evolution to literal non-stop talking that worries me. I hope she gets any help she needs in time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh man, I’m kind of like this in menopause. Well, not THAT bad but I have an almost compulsive need to verbalize the things that are causing me stress. I’m only like that at home with my family, so I can control it but I’m sure it annoys the F out of them. I likely do have undiagnosed ADD.

I’m really trying to work on it. I’m very aware of it, unlike your relative and thankfully, I’m also a good listener and can be quiet for long stretches - this is very intermittent, during periods of high stress.

Ufff. I am in the same shoes. I am horrified at how much I talk nowadays. Yes, I am also a good listener but the need to verbalize everything invokes shame for me after it is over.