How do I tell my parents it’s my business if I don’t want kids?
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Anonymous
| They should know that having kids is a life-changing responsibility and should of me for recognizing that I’m not cut out for it. |
Anonymous
| Don't say anything. Actions speak louder than words |
Anonymous
| It's entirely your decision but I don't think you can ever convince anyone else it's th right/best decision. Everyone is just wired differently. |
Anonymous
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Don’t engage. You don’t need to explain yourself or let them hound you. If they question you just say you’re not interested in talking about it anymore and change the subject. If they won’t stop, end the interaction.
When one of my DDs told me she didn’t want children I did have some questions. I asked her if she would be ok talking about it and she agreed. I wanted to understand her decision and I did not try to convince her to change her mind or belittle her decision. And that was that. I respect her decision and it’s not an issue. I would feel the same way even if she had said no to my initial question. You have the right to make this decision and if your parents don’t get that you will have to be very firm with your boundaries. |
Anonymous
| I never told my parents I don't want kids. I've just ... never been pregnant. When my mother made comments about "hope you get a daughter just as difficult as you were for me" I just comment to her how mean that is to say. |
Anonymous
| A web for parents seems a weird place to ask this question. |
Anonymous
| What do you say when they bring it up? |
Anonymous
| 51 year old female DINK here. I've been through it. What are they saying or doing that you feel you need to respond to? Are you male or female? And are you in a relationship now? How long/how serious? And how old are you. All of this plays into what I might suggest you consider as a reply. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| I know that my SIL ended up having to have a direct heart to heart with her mom (her dad really wasn't an issue) to basically make it unequivocally clear that there would be no children. No maybes, not later in life, no hopes, no comments, no justifications. Just a mid-30s "We do not want children and we will not be having children." It was tough for MIL but she accepted and respected it. This helped their relationship to remove the elephant in the room. It is still tough for SIL at family gatherings (she didn't have conversations with others) but now MIL can (and we can too) head it off and redirect or low-key defend the decision to be childfree for her, now that we know. |
Anonymous
Lol your first paragraph is in direct conflict with your second. |
Anonymous
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Simply tell them the truth - be firm and insist they respect your choice. As a mother - I will never ask nor nag our two children for grandkids or inquire if they want kids. It’s a very personal choice that they should be able to make on their own - less my opinion. |
Anonymous
| Yes, it's no one's business. I have two nieces who never had children. We have never asked them why. They have great careers, marriages and seem extremely happy. Who are we to judge. |
Anonymous
| I very nearly chose not to have kids, so I get it. But as a parent I would want to know if it was a money issue (stability, fertility treatments, mental health whatever) because I would offer to help with the money. |
Anonymous
+1 You don't owe anyone an explanation about your uterus and they don't get to discuss yours either. You don't say a thing. |