Wife Lets Son Smoke

Anonymous
I feel like I'm being pranked here.

My 14 year old son was caught with a pack of Camels about a month ago and I had a long conversation with him how absolutely idiotic this habit is. I told him he needs to stop now before he gets addicted. I explained the whole waste of money aspect, the cancer thing, all of it. He agreed to stop.

This weekend a neighbor told me he saw my son at his high school's baseball game and my son and two friends were smoking.

I told him all this and he confessed that he was smoking........ but his mother told him it was OK to do this while young.

I went upstairs and asked my wife about it and she said "Yeah, I did, whats the big deal?"

I responded with something like are you out of your frigging mind and she accused me of overreacting.

This is insane, right?
Anonymous
Where is this?

Fourteen year olds vape in 2025. They do not smoke.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Where is this?

Fourteen year olds vape in 2025. They do not smoke.

They should not be doing either. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills between you and OP's wife.
Anonymous
Take him to the pediatrician for a conversation. Follow up with monthly cotinine tests. These can be blood or urine based. Create consequences and follow through.
Anonymous
Yes, this is insane. Please bring your son to his pediatrician and have the pediatrician explain why he's taking years off his life.

If there's a history of cancer in the family, especially lung cancer, this could be a death sentence. Show him videos of someone dying of lung cancer. It's a horrible way to die. But even if there isn't, smoking damages arteries and the heart and significantly increases the risks of heart disease.

Separately you need to try to talk some sense into his mother.
Anonymous

You and wife should have a convo with your son together - not separately.

However, you and your wife need to discuss a proactive way forward approach first.

Anonymous
Do the people saying "take the kid to the pediatrician" actually have teens? A doctor is not going to scare a teen into not smoking.
Anonymous
“I don’t care what your mother says, it’s not okay, it’s a trashy habit and it will impact you for the rest of your life.”
Follow up with testing. It’s hard to quit.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Do the people saying "take the kid to the pediatrician" actually have teens? A doctor is not going to scare a teen into not smoking.

No, but a doctor can order the tests to monitor the level nicotine (and other substances) in his blood and/or urine. Additionally, bringing him to the doctor for this shows that it is a serious situation that will be closely monitored. I have 2 teens and I would do this and more. The phone should've been taken away already and earned back. The friends? Nope! I would raise hell.
Anonymous
Does your wife smoke (or did she smoke when she was young) is that why she has a dismissive attitude?
Anonymous
Tell him many smokers can't get their d-ck up
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Do the people saying "take the kid to the pediatrician" actually have teens? A doctor is not going to scare a teen into not smoking.


My teens' doctor? I bet she could. She's pretty forceful.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Do the people saying "take the kid to the pediatrician" actually have teens? A doctor is not going to scare a teen into not smoking.

Not only that but how do you make an appointment for “lecture patient re dangers.” Sometimes people will also advise asking a police officer or firefighter to provide lectures to family members and I always wonder from what decade these folks are visiting.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do the people saying "take the kid to the pediatrician" actually have teens? A doctor is not going to scare a teen into not smoking.

Not only that but how do you make an appointment for “lecture patient re dangers.” Sometimes people will also advise asking a police officer or firefighter to provide lectures to family members and I always wonder from what decade these folks are visiting.

I need an appt with Dr. Ballbreaking to evaluate a potential substance abuse situation with my 14yo.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Does your wife smoke (or did she smoke when she was young) is that why she has a dismissive attitude?

His wife is disfunctional and I bet the fockery abounds.
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