What do you think is the best age to become parents?

[Anonymous]

I met DH when I was 24, got engaged at 27, married at 29 and had 3 kids in my thirties. Now that I’m older, I wish I had kids earlier. I had my third child at almost 40. I will be in my seventies when I am a grandmother.

I have some acquaintances who are in their mid to late fifties and their kids are getting married young. They will be grandmothers by age 60.

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on the career and the individual. Having kids at 23 is obviously good physically speaking, but is not for everyone, especially on this website.

[Anonymous]

I had 2 viable pregnancies before 30, leading to a son and daughter. After 5 additional non-viable pregnancies, I have been diagnosed with several autoimmune diseases, had my thyroid taken out and have suspected endometriosis. While my experience may be outside the norm, I'm VERY glad I started having kids early! I wouldn't have had biological kids at all if I'd started later.

[Anonymous]

I'm with you OP. I had my one kid at 35. Infertility is a factor in not having more, but also just the lack of energy. And my parents are in their late seventies so declining. I envy people who had kids young. But at the same time I am grateful for the happy family I have.

[Anonymous]

The “right” age does not exist. It is relative. Everything has trade offs.
I had kids at 29, 31 and 34. Not too young, not too old and yet, it was too early professionally and I missed the career boat (I think). My friend all had kids years after me and were not very understanding of my limitations at the time so I felt isolated for a time.
Will I have grand children in my late 50s and 60s? I hope so… my mom was 57 when I had my first and she was a huge help. She would not be able to be present in the same way now that she is 69 (not even close) and my kids would not have the relationship they have with such important people in their lives had I had them 10 years later.

Also, I got pregnant first try with all 3 of my kids. That might have not been the case had I waited.

Overall, I am happy and things are great. They could have been better in some ways and worse in others had I waited or anticipated.

[Anonymous]

I had my kids at 29 and 32. My only complaint with that timing is now mixing perimenopause with teenage hormones.

[Anonymous]

I had my kids at 28, 31, and 37. All fine, but there has definitely been no “bounce back” since the third kid - it’s been a deliberate climb. I’m naturally energetic and youthful so it works for me, but I can tell even my boundless energy actually does know some bounds. lol.

[Anonymous]

I had my kids at 28 and 30. I’m pretty happy with where I am in the whole parenting experience.

[Anonymous]

If money is no object, 24-28. Then, you're mature enough, yet still have the energy to function on little sleep. Would you be the best parent? Perhaps not. But you can hire a great nanny. Plus, your parents would be young enough to help out evenings and weekends, when they're off of work. In your 30s and beyond, you can focus on building your career without interruptions. From personal experience, it's harder adjusting to the relentless nature of parenting when you've spent your 20s having fun and traveling.

I had my 2 kids in my early 30s. DH wants 1-2 more, but I'm too tired and the fertility door is closing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If money is no object, 24-28. Then, you're mature enough, yet still have the energy to function on little sleep. Would you be the best parent? Perhaps not. But you can hire a great nanny. Plus, your parents would be young enough to help out evenings and weekends, when they're off of work. In your 30s and beyond, you can focus on building your career without interruptions. From personal experience, it's harder adjusting to the relentless nature of parenting when you've spent your 20s having fun and traveling.

I had my 2 kids in my early 30s. DH wants 1-2 more, but I'm too tired and the fertility door is closing.

I think the presumption that older parent = better is unfair and inaccurate. But I do agree that the twenties are the optimal time.

[Anonymous]

We are happy with our choice to start in our early 30s

[Anonymous]

I had mine at 32 and 35. (My husband was 38 and 41.) I had 10 years to build my career, travel, save/invest, and have fun with my husband. l didn't feel either too young or too old. (Though I was taken aback when my OB/GYN used the term "geriatric pregnancy" with my second!)

Now I am 57, have just finished paying for kids' college, my parents have died, and I just retired last month. I am in good health and have lots of energy. I am happy to have a period of freedom before the next generation comes along. I would like to be helpful to my kids with their kids, but I want to go into that chapter of life feeling like I had a chance to sow my remaining wild oats!

[Anonymous]

When you are married and financially secure and ready. That could be different ages for different people.

Then your kid will have a stable family life, you can financially give your kids what you want, and you are mature and ready for kids.

[Anonymous]

31, 35

[Anonymous]

I don’t think there is a “right” age.

I had ours at 29 and 31. DH is 2yrs older.