Why do some kids behave horribly?

[Anonymous]

and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

one reason is that kids are no longer allowed to fight. When I was growing up, the kids kept each other in check with their fists. everyone knew who had the upper hand over who, and a natural order was maintained. teachers and parents cannot police kids 24/7, so the kids policed each other and that was the accountability.

[Anonymous]

They’re parented by millennials.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

one reason is that kids are no longer allowed to fight. When I was growing up, the kids kept each other in check with their fists. everyone knew who had the upper hand over who, and a natural order was maintained. teachers and parents cannot police kids 24/7, so the kids policed each other and that was the accountability.

Where do you live?

[Anonymous]

I noticed those parents don’t say anything to correct their misbehaved child/children, even it happens right in front of them, they simply ignored. Some try to correct their misbehaved child/children but they don’t listen, probably because they didn’t teach when kids were younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I noticed those parents don’t say anything to correct their misbehaved child/children, even it happens right in front of them, they simply ignored. Some try to correct their misbehaved child/children but they don’t listen, probably because they didn’t teach when kids were younger.

Ugh THIS. Anyone know of any communities in the DC area where people actually PARENT their children? Would be interested in moving there.

[Anonymous]

NCLB was informally extended to behavior. Suspending a kid doesn't actually improve their behavior. It's nearly impossible to expel a kid under 16 - the law says school districts MUST educate them.

Way more kids with IEP's means it takes longer for IEP meetings, and resources are spread thin. NCLB also means you can't get poorly behaved kids out of mainstream classes. So eventually "normal" kids are pushed to their limits and snap behavior wise. Teachers have to spend tons of time documenting behavior, restoring order, comforting crying kids, doing school shooting drills, chasing down kids who run out class, etc. Kids who'd otherwise behave get restless.

[Anonymous]

I'm a special ed teacher and here's one example. My client is in 8th grade and has had trouble since he started school. My client asked for help for years, but the schools shrugged her off. Finally we got him evaluated and he has severe dyslexia -- in 8th grade, reading at a 1st grade level. But because that was never recognized or supported, he developed all sorts of strategies to avoid reading -- acting out, disrupting the class, leaving class, etc. No, it's not great, but can you blame him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

one reason is that kids are no longer allowed to fight. When I was growing up, the kids kept each other in check with their fists. everyone knew who had the upper hand over who, and a natural order was maintained. teachers and parents cannot police kids 24/7, so the kids policed each other and that was the accountability.

DID YOU ORDER THE CODE RED?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a special ed teacher and here's one example. My client is in 8th grade and has had trouble since he started school. My client asked for help for years, but the schools shrugged her off. Finally we got him evaluated and he has severe dyslexia -- in 8th grade, reading at a 1st grade level. But because that was never recognized or supported, he developed all sorts of strategies to avoid reading -- acting out, disrupting the class, leaving class, etc. No, it's not great, but can you blame him?

I meant, I'm a special ed lawyer, not teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They’re parented by millennials.

Around here there are many clueless, checked elementary school parents in their late forties and into their mid-fifties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

one reason is that kids are no longer allowed to fight. When I was growing up, the kids kept each other in check with their fists. everyone knew who had the upper hand over who, and a natural order was maintained. teachers and parents cannot police kids 24/7, so the kids policed each other and that was the accountability.

DID YOU ORDER THE CODE RED?

ILY

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: and what happened to repercussions and accountability? 20 years ago when I was in school, kids were held liable for their actions in school / on buses (suspended, expelled, etc). Is the new age just to be complacent to terrible behavior from teens who then turn into adults that commit crime ??

With the exception of kids who have major mental illnesses that are very hard to treat at young ages, most of the kids who behave horribly have parents who also behave horribly. Most schools stopped using suspensions and explosions when NCLB started tying those things and dropout rates to school funding. I'm not sure how old you are, but if you were in high school 20 years ago the really badly behaved kids were either allowed to drop out with relatively little pushback, sent to alternative schools, or spent most of the day in resource classrooms.

[Anonymous]

The behavior issues really ramped up when the Education department issued the “dear colleagues” letter during the Obama era. It dated that schools could be sued for differences in suspensions by race. Schools responded by getting rid of suspension entirely. Suspension was just treated as a holiday by kids since parents often refuse to hold their kids accountable. Technology use meant kids didn’t feel they were missing anything (socially/entertainment/assignment) by being absent anyways.

So now kids have very little consequences. 7% of boys are thought to be narcissists (girls 3-4%). Trauma and other issues creates a lot psychos and kids who don’t trust adults or unwilling to follow rules from adults. The guardrails that could contain these kids are now gone. Overall it has meant that being in a classroom is often miserable for students and teachers. Kids are mostly checked out and doing the bare Minimum in most schools. Teachers have trouble engaging kids addicted to screens or who can’t handle labs, independent thinking, or working socially with others.

Truly sad to see how things have gone downhill in the last 15 years. The smart kids with parent support are doing better than ever, but everyone else seems to really be unmotivated.

-A teacher.

[Anonymous]

Gentle parenting, NCLB, and abuse of private school suits for payments in certain districts are all contributing factors.