Are all football coaches control freaks?

[Anonymous]

This might also apply to other coaches too.
If a kid misses a few practices in the summer because he had a party, or a family get together, or a vacation, or over slept please tell me why that is a big deal?
To me, ages 14-18 are the years that nothing other than academics and family should matter that much. As a matter of fact, I feel that the social life matters more than sports! Also, you should be able to miss practices and still play on the D--- team!
Since when did life get so ridiculously serious at this age?
Please someone bring back the 70's. Never thought I would write that.

[Anonymous]

It's an obligation like anything else.

Kids get sick; kids have other interests that may cause scheduling conflicts.

My guess is that your definition of a "few" is drastically different from the coach's definition. And you may just be making excuses for your son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This might also apply to other coaches too.
If a kid misses a few practices in the summer because he had a party, or a family get together, or a vacation, or over slept please tell me why that is a big deal?
To me, ages 14-18 are the years that nothing other than academics and family should matter that much. As a matter of fact, I feel that the social life matters more than sports! Also, you should be able to miss practices and still play on the D--- team!
Since when did life get so ridiculously serious at this age?
Please someone bring back the 70's. Never thought I would write that.

Control freak? I assume OP's son is in HS if age 14-18. JV or Varsity. There are guys on football team rosters for the social - potential parties and bragging rights. Good for the coach if the child's position is left bench.

[Anonymous]

Why do you have your kid on a sports team?

Is it to teach them what it takes to be a team member? Is it to give them something to do? Is it to show that if you are going to be committed to something you need to be there?

Many coaches are responsible for 40-50 kids, in some schools more. They have a system; that system works when everyone is on the same page. Some kids are getting scholarships, some will play at the next level, and some kids are committed and take great pride in being at every game and practice. Some don’t and the coaches try to get the kids to commit. If not, the kid sits around and complains to their parents about the coach.

The coaches are committed to coaching; the students need to be committed to the sport. It is not that hard to show up for each practice.

[Anonymous]

A party??? Overslept??? In high school? You've got to be kidding me. You're making an excuse for that? Sounds like an overprotective mother who doesn't understand the importance of "team" in team sports.

[Anonymous]

it is an extra-curricular activity yes, but if you are going to try out for the team you have to be willing to make the committment.
I can't blame any coach for not playing a kid who misses practice for reasons like a party, family get together, vacation, or he over slept.
I think if your son shares your opionin on this he should drop out right now.

[Anonymous]

It's just the way coaches manage their teams. They're kind of like Drill Sergeants in the Marine Corps. The tough talk is more drama than substance. Do your best to be the best team member you can be, but most people have to miss practice now and then.

Stick with it, don't give up, give it a couple of days and I promise you someone different will be on the shit list. One other thing I promise you, someone will always be on the shit list. That's how they keep everyone in line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:it is an extra-curricular activity yes, but if you are going to try out for the team you have to be willing to make the committment.
I can't blame any coach for not playing a kid who misses practice for reasons like a party, family get together, vacation, or he over slept.
I think if your son shares your opionin on this he should drop out right now.

High school football is not an extra curricular activity. It is a contact sport and any one playing it should be conditioning and lifting year round. Some private schools and smaller publics leave some on the roster or don't cut even though the individuals contribute nothing. Or worse than nothing. In the way at practice and reinforce negative social behaviors. Those in for social are usually heavy in the partying [ragers, drinking, pot, late nights] etc. They usually have friends who play and the whole social scene drags down the team.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:it is an extra-curricular activity yes, but if you are going to try out for the team you have to be willing to make the committment.
I can't blame any coach for not playing a kid who misses practice for reasons like a party, family get together, vacation, or he over slept.
I think if your son shares your opionin on this he should drop out right now.

High school football is not an extra curricular activity. It is a contact sport and any one playing it should be conditioning and lifting year round. Some private schools and smaller publics leave some on the roster or don't cut even though the individuals contribute nothing. Or worse than nothing. In the way at practice and reinforce negative social behaviors. Those in for social are usually heavy in the partying [ragers, drinking, pot, late nights] etc. They usually have friends who play and the whole social scene drags down the team.

o.k., I'm the one who said that. It is extra-curricular in that it is completely voluntary. He's not on scholarship. Agree with the rest of what you saud though.

[Anonymous]

You have to stay conditioned to safely play a contact sport (says lady who plays WFTDA roller derby) at that age, and committments are important. That said, sometimes coaches can be WAAAAAY too emotionally invested. No, it's not the end of the world if a kid misses a practice due to a conflicting family commitment. If it's habitual, that's different.

[Anonymous]

OP here, older mom too. When I was coming up nothing was this serious...nothing. It does not feel like fun at all, and I want no part of it.
I don't mind that he does not play if he does not go to practice, since he seems to like the idea of practice more than playing in games, but they want to remove him from the team for no shows. I have a passive voice that says let him over sleep and so on, but I know that DS will figure me out. I liked the idea of football, but this is crazy.
Everything kids do nowadays is really maxed out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, older mom too. When I was coming up nothing was this serious...nothing. It does not feel like fun at all, and I want no part of it.
I don't mind that he does not play if he does not go to practice, since he seems to like the idea of practice more than playing in games, but they want to remove him from the team for no shows. I have a passive voice that says let him over sleep and so on, but I know that DS will figure me out. I liked the idea of football, but this is crazy.
Everything kids do nowadays is really maxed out.

So your son who is on the team may have taken a spot of a kid who wanted to be on the team, maybe that kid wasn't as good as your kid during the summer practices but worked harder. I would much rather have a harder working kid with marginal talent than a kid with talent and a marginal desire to be on the team.

Have him turn in his jersey.

[Anonymous]

OP, if they remove him, they remove him. It's up to him. I agree with you, but if he's in it for fun, and the team ain't in it for fun, it might be best to just let it shake out and have them remove him. There's probably a rec league somewhere. Or hell, if he's an enterprising young man, he could start one.

[Anonymous]

What a wake-up call this must be for the mom - football is taken seriously by the coaches.
Frankly, I can't see why any coach would want a slacker like this kld around.

[Anonymous]

OP here, I still don't get it. I was a great athlete in school, my son is also very good. He is their fastest runner, largest kid, and an excellent receiver. But can someone tell me what is this term "slacker" supposed to be about? He is ALWAYS laughing. He's not always sure if his team won or not. Never disruptive. He has given the opponents pointers and has lent equipment to them. He is only a 15 year old boy. Am I supposed to tell him to pull himself together? The thing that gets me is the coach should have dismissed him, but I guess his size and speed are too much to ignore. I would almost respect the coach more if he would just release him, no threats. There are no intramurals and I can't drive him to rec leagues.
I guess I am the only one who remembers the days when it was OK to not practice year round, or go to football camp and so on.
Not one of the kids on his team will be pro, but even if one wanted to do so, no one is stopping them.