Is it reasonable for BIL to host his mom for Christmas

Anonymous
My family is planning to come to our house for Christmas. BIL now lives in the same area and has a 3 bedroom house.

Is it reasonable for BIL to host his mom and bring MIL to our house on Christmas Day?

If you have out of town and in town family, where does everyone stay?

Usually my family or dh’s family visits us. My dad has been in poor condition so he hasn’t been able to come. He may not have many holidays left.

I guess the other option is in laws don’t come this holiday.
Anonymous
Op again. Both sets of parents live out of state. After Covid, we have never had a conflict since we went to visit my parents or MIL for one holiday or MIL came to visit.
Anonymous
I don’t understand the question.
Do you mean can you still have your family visit you and stay with you….and also welcome your BIL (assuming this is your DH’s brother) to come over for Christmas dinner and bring your MIL who is staying with him? And combine everyone into the celebration?

Yes this is reasonable and lovely—assuming everyone in your family is cordial to one another. If you have Hatfield/McCoys or Montague/Capulet scenario in your family then no.
Anonymous
It’s completely reasonable for him to bring his mother. Geeze.
Anonymous
I don’t understand the question. If BiL wants to host, yes. If not, not your business.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It’s completely reasonable for him to bring his mother. Geeze.


+1

Although I really have no idea what op was asking.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand the question. If BiL wants to host, yes. If not, not your business.

OP is so unclear but I think the issue is that she does not want to host MIL in her home; she wants BIL to do it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand the question. If BiL wants to host, yes. If not, not your business.

OP is so unclear but I think the issue is that she does not want to host MIL in her home; she wants BIL to do it.


Oh. Well, you don’t get to force other people to host others.
Anonymous
I assume the question is actually “ is it reasonable to expect BIL to have her stay with him rather than stay with us”.

We can’t answer that. Generally, it’s not reasonable to expect or demand that anybody host anybody. But if the relationship is good, it certainly is reasonable to suggest it.
Anonymous
Since BIL’s house is not your property, it is not reasonable to expect to control it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I assume the question is actually “ is it reasonable to expect BIL to have her stay with him rather than stay with us”.

We can’t answer that. Generally, it’s not reasonable to expect or demand that anybody host anybody. But if the relationship is good, it certainly is reasonable to suggest it.


Yes, the question is whether it is reasonable for BIL to have MIL stay with him and bring her over on Christmas since my family will be at our house.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I assume the question is actually “ is it reasonable to expect BIL to have her stay with him rather than stay with us”.

We can’t answer that. Generally, it’s not reasonable to expect or demand that anybody host anybody. But if the relationship is good, it certainly is reasonable to suggest it.


Yes, the question is whether it is reasonable for BIL to have MIL stay with him and bring her over on Christmas since my family will be at our house.


Why wouldn’t it be reasonable?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s completely reasonable for him to bring his mother. Geeze.


+1

Although I really have no idea what op was asking.


I was asking what other people do with out of town guests. If one person lets everyone sleep at their house.

I have one friend who is in a similar type situation where her brother never hosts their mom. Mom wants to visit during holidays and it is always staying at her house so she started saying they are going out of town to avoid being the host. The brother HAD to host his mom. My friend never actually had any plans to go anywhere so now she has to book something.
Anonymous
We prefer all out of town guests to stay in a nearby hotel.

It's also what we do when we travel to visit family and friends..
Anonymous
Your post is very confusing op. What do you want to have happen for Christmas? What are the objections you’re seeing or anticipating from others?
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