Friend asked DD9 to cat sit - vent
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Anonymous
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A friend asked me if my DD (9) could come over 1x/day to feed her cats / scoop kitty litter. For 3 days (during the school week). She wants to pay DD $10/day. Friend lives 20 minutes away (25 with traffic). So for me, this means I'd be spending 1+ hour driving DD there/from, plus our school days are pretty full anyway because she doesn't get home until 3:30 PM and goes to bed around 7:30 PM. Am I crazy or is this a little obnoxious of friend? She didn't acknowledge anything about how this put the onus on me - someone who has a job and other kids and needs to make dinner, help with homework, etc.
I think I'll write back pointing out the driving distance / school day issue and suggest she find someone in her neighborhood. $10 for at least 1 hr of our time (and 45 minutes in the car) seems almost offensive. What is my friend thinking? |
Anonymous
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Is it fun being a ***** all the time.
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Anonymous
| "That won't work for our schedule, sorry!" |
Anonymous
| Your friend did the right thing by asking you instead of asking your daughter. You can say no and your daughter won't even know. So, do that. Say no, it doesn't work for your schedule. |
Anonymous
| I would just write back, “ahh, wish she could! With school and activities, I don’t think she could fit the round trip in her schedule. Thanks for thinking of her.” |
Anonymous
This! Why are you so angry? Just say no. |
Anonymous
| Calm down OP. She asked, it doesn’t work for your schedule and you can politely say so. No need to get in a huff over it. |
Anonymous
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Thank you all for the reality check. I will calm it down and reply as suggested.
I think I'm just frustrated because I have so many balls in the air and daily obligations (as most of us parents do) and it felt like my friend was overstepping. Thank you all! |
Anonymous
Your friend probably thought your daughter likes cats and seems responsible enough, and then stopped thinking. |
Anonymous
This It’s one thing to do it for a close by neighbor. I would never ask someone to do from 20 mins away. |
Anonymous
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She probably didn't think about the driving distance and thought your daughter might appreciate the opportunity to earn some spending money.
We hire neighborhood teens/tweens to feed our cats, but they live just a few houses down-so a couple minutes walk at most. We pay $20/day. 7:30 is a really early bed time! |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Op here. It is really early! We start school on Monday, so my goal is 730 PM on school nights - we'll see if it sticks. My kids have to be at school at 7:20 AM! (Thanks for your response!) |
Anonymous
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People with pets are eternally hopeful someone will save them boarding money or paying a grownup.
Some affluent parents want their kids to model working even if there's a huge logistics or financial cost behind it (think 3rd car and car insurance). I'm glad you feel calmer now. I'm sure your friend was just asking for the reasons above. I didn't let my kids petsit for our nice next door neighbor when she asked. I would do it for free but she wants to pay a small amount and have the kids do it. Realistically it would all be on me. My kids are not entrepreneurial or pet lovers. My neighbor established a relationship with the teen down the street that works well for both parties. |
Anonymous
| I'm guessing your friend doesn't have school aged kids or no kids. |