Is the phrase “fresh off the boat” offensive in all circumstances?

[Anonymous]

I am an immigrant but have been here for over a decade. I was finally able to bring my dad over and I took him to dmv to get his state ID. I was talking to the lady who was handing out the tickets and she asked if he ever had an ID from any state before, to which I said no, he is fresh off the boat.

For context we are both white. I thought it was ok to say it since 1) it’s directed at a white man and as a joke and 2) there’s a show by that name.
I would never use it towards any Asian person or any non white person for that matter, or even anyone who isn’t my close friend honestly.

The lady casually told me it wasn’t a good phrase (we were being a bit chatty with her). She wasn’t Asian but wasn’t white either (not sure if it matters).

So my question is: should I stop using the phrase completely? Even if it’s about my dad who is white?

[Anonymous]

It's not ok to use casually with strangers. As for friends, you know your audience. In some immigrant communities they have acronyms for new immigrants and second generation people.

[Anonymous]

This was a TV show that had many seasons. I think you can say whatever you want about you and your dad.

I wouldn't ask someone if they are fresh off the boat, though.

[Anonymous]

People are too sensitive. Sticks and stones

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not ok to use casually with strangers. As for friends, you know your audience. In some immigrant communities they have acronyms for new immigrants and second generation people.

You mean even if the phrase isn’t directed at a stranger? In any situation involving strangers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This was a TV show that had many seasons. I think you can say whatever you want about you and your dad.

I wouldn't ask someone if they are fresh off the boat, though.

This was my understanding too but I guess some disagree?
-OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are too sensitive. Sticks and stones

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are too sensitive. Sticks and stones

The dmv lady was definitely not first or second gen American so I don’t think she was offended, she was more like… educating me

[Anonymous]

I am fifty-five & Asian.

Growing up, I heard that term (especially in my teenage yrs!) as derogatory toward people of color so just to hear that phrase now, no matter who it is directed to…..just stings + brings back bad memories. 🤨

Though I realize this is only my personal experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People are too sensitive. Sticks and stones

The dmv lady was definitely not first or second gen American so I don’t think she was offended, she was more like… educating me

A different version of a Karen. Seriously, I really hate people like this. Know it alls who think it's okay to say something to strangers.

People do it here all the time. But in real life? Nope.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am fifty-five & Asian.

Growing up, I heard that term (especially in my teenage yrs!) as derogatory toward people of color so just to hear that phrase now, no matter who it is directed to…..just stings + brings back bad memories. 🤨

Though I realize this is only my personal experience.

The TV show, Fresh off the Boat, was a success and about an Asian family trying to fit in to the US. Not that this negates your feelings, but I think there are people who don't take it has harshly as you do.

[Anonymous]

I'm foreign and don't mind the phrase at all. Fresh off the boat, fresh off the airplane, I've BTDT, not understanding what's offensive here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am fifty-five & Asian.

Growing up, I heard that term (especially in my teenage yrs!) as derogatory toward people of color so just to hear that phrase now, no matter who it is directed to…..just stings + brings back bad memories. 🤨

Though I realize this is only my personal experience.

Grow a thicker skin and get over rude things people say.

[Anonymous]

I could see my non-PC dad saying this and meaning no offense. He is fresh off the boat though, though he is also white.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People are too sensitive. Sticks and stones

The dmv lady was definitely not first or second gen American so I don’t think she was offended, she was more like… educating me

A different version of a Karen. Seriously, I really hate people like this. Know it alls who think it's okay to say something to strangers.

People do it here all the time. But in real life? Nope.

So Fresh off the boat is bad, but Karen is…OK?