Men, if you don't want kids, whats the reason?

[Anonymous]

Curious. Dating a man who says he never wanted kids before me not even with his ex wife. When I ask why he can't explain. He just says he never wanted to be a father. I'm curbing on dcum old age though lol but if there are other men with the same line of thinking, why did you never want kids?

[Anonymous]

What do you mean "never wanted kids before me" as in he wants them now after dating you?

If so, my best guess is he really likes you and he may not still "want" them but he is willing to have them if you want them strongly.

As to why, there are a ton of reasons to not want kids. They are expensive, a ton of work, impact your career, they can be annoying and the list goes on.

[Anonymous]

Weird.

Most don’t care or think kids are fun Mini Ames yet won’t do any of the work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Curious. Dating a man who says he never wanted kids before me not even with his ex wife. When I ask why he can't explain. He just says he never wanted to be a father. I'm curbing on dcum old age though lol but if there are other men with the same line of thinking, why did you never want kids?

He should be able, if things are serious, to explain and articulate why.

Otherwise people will start assuming he had a traumatic childhood or doesn’t want to pass along something genetic.

[Anonymous]

If you want kids and you don't have 10 years to waste. Id move on.
He's likely telling you what you want to hear and that will end with you 5 years int marriage ready for kids and him still needing more time or having kids and he tells you he hates his life.

[Anonymous]

You should be more concerned with why he changed his mind

[Anonymous]

I wish I could date him. That is what I am looking for.

[Anonymous]

Too much responsibility and work.

[Anonymous]

He didn't want the responsibility; same for most men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish I could date him. That is what I am looking for.

What are you talking about there are plenty of men out there that don't want kids?!

[Anonymous]

Would YOU bring children into this screwed up world?

[Anonymous]

Why does he need to articulate why? Do people have to write an essay on why they want kids? No. Some people just don't want to be parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Curious. Dating a man who says he never wanted kids before me not even with his ex wife. When I ask why he can't explain. He just says he never wanted to be a father. I'm curbing on dcum old age though lol but if there are other men with the same line of thinking, why did you never want kids?

Why does it require more explanation than "I don't want to." Do you have any explanation for wanting them other than, "I want to be a parent"?

If you are badgering him for an explanation so that you can argue with him about why he is wrong and he should have kids with you, that's really rude and likely pointless. If you want kids and he's telling you he doesn't, it is time for you to move on. DH and I talked about our desire for kids on our 2nd date (age 30 and 36). If either of us had not been interested in parenthood, there would not have been a 3rd date. Not going to waste time on that.

[Anonymous]

OP, I never thought about being a mother until after I got married. I would imagine a lot of men are similar. They just don't think about it until they do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should be more concerned with why he changed his mind

+1


Sometimes people don’t want kids. This isn’t special to men, and we need to just accept that people are allowed to have different things without needing to justify them.