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DD recently came home from college and I am shocked by the amount of piercings She has gotten. I counted seven on one ear, five in the other, and a nose stud. But worse, was almost sure I could see both nipples were pierced when She was in a swimsuit. I know it's Her choice, but I think it's excessive, and nipple piercings are plain gross.
How can I respectfully share my displeasure? Anyone dealt with a similar situation ? |
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Her body her choice?
And have you considered that she is probably already aware of your displeasure and just doesn’t care? |
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Be thankful it’s not a tattoo.
Buy her good body jewelry so her nips don’t get infected. |
| I'm sorry OP. Our kids do stuff we don't agree with. My only DD now 23 has a tatoo of a rose on her arm that she did herself, prison style. Hate it. |
Wow! That’s beyond trashy! |
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OP, if you can, find out the motivation. My 18 y.o. niece, who is living with us due to a toxic home environment, just had a few done.
The belly-button piercing was something she always wanted and is happy about. However, when she got the nipple one, things were rough and it was a way of doing self-harm (and getting that momentary relief) that no one would see. Getting a piercing for that latter reason doesn't solve the problem, and then can lead to wanting to get more piercings (to get more temporary relief). My niece said that after the nipple piercing, she wanted more. She's agreed to hold off for now, and I'm hoping she removes the nipple one because of the intentions behind getting it. |
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Just be grateful she didn't get her lip or cheek pierced. I have a friend whose daughter did that in high school, and my friend ranted about how it was OK because it was "not permanent" and was "a good way to express herself." When the girl took the piercings out a few years later, the holes didn't go away, and they had to visit a plastic surgeon.
Maybe you can bargain with your daughter to ensure she doesn't pierce her face or get any tattoos? |
| Just to do your parental duty you can nonchalantly discuss if she has researched all short and long term consequence of this hobby. After that, it's her choice. |
| I agree that mental health is something I would worry about here. I would have a conversation with her about that, and tangentially about the company she keeps, not the piercings. |
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This doesn't sound like an addiction and I'm sure she knows how you feel about them.
If you are otherwise concerned about her mental health, then ask (nonjudgmentally!) how she's doing, but leave the piercings out of it. |
| You cannot "respectfully share your displeasure." It is disrespectful to comment on the choices others make about their own bodies, period. |
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I don't see the big deal if she's using her own money.
I might talk to her about the potential damage to her teeth in case she's thinking about a tongue piercing. |
| Just tell her you think they look so cool and that you are thinking of getting a few too. Suggest that you together for a few piercings, perhaps VCH. |
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Sorry.
I would also be concerned. Has she had mental health struggles? Substance abuse ? |
100% |