Charging 20$ a head for a potluck/BYOB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yup. Rich people are often the stingiest.

We shouldn't speak ill of OP--she might still be hanging around the thread and get her feelings hurt.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't think that's unreasonable given that they are providing some food and presumably planning, setting up, and cleaning up. You can always decline to participate. You can always volunteer to plan the next one and change how it's done.

I agree. $20 is not going to cover a couple of burgers with all fixings, sides, as well as the multiple drinks most adults will consume.

$20 per person. For hot dogs, hamburgers, ice, and soft drinks?? With lots of other food at the party, most adults aren’t going to eat “a couple of burgers.” And people are making up that the “host” is paying kids to set up tables and chairs.

Fake “host” sounds cheap. At those prices, she is going to wind up with a lot of extra money.

I'm amazed at all the people calling the organizer (not host!) cheap, when apparently OP and her entire neighborhood are vastly wealthy, but kick up an epic fuss at contributing $20. Rich people neighborhoods are the literal worst. No community, no caring, no collaboration, just suspicion, comparison, and condescension.

Why do people who have no spirit of generosity or community insist on "hosting" and "doing everyone a favor"? Either you host a party or you don't. Enough with the cheapness and nickle and diming.

+1. She wants the credit of hosting and the credit of being lady bountiful and coordinating a block party, but does not want to invest the time, energy or money to do either properly. She cannot even be bothered to set out a sign up sheet to ask people to help clean up and is hiring someone to do it!!![/quote]

I don't think OP said this. Someone else introduced the idea.

[Anonymous]

This is tacky as F. I would not go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have never, ever, been invited to a paying block party. My (wealthy) street does block parties.

The whole idea behind a potluck is that you contribute in food instead of in money. The host can't have it both ways.

Our block party has the burgers/hot dogs catered (food truck thingy), and I think it was something like $20/adult and then people brought drinks and apps/desserts.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't think that's unreasonable given that they are providing some food and presumably planning, setting up, and cleaning up. You can always decline to participate. You can always volunteer to plan the next one and change how it's done.

I agree. $20 is not going to cover a couple of burgers with all fixings, sides, as well as the multiple drinks most adults will consume.

Sine they ask that people bring food and drink that they'll consume, no one will eat $20 worth of burgers

Fixings, sides, napkins, cups, cutlery, soft drinks, tables, charcoal. Also she should frankly get a cut from having to deal with petty, whiny, shrews like you and OP. Just stay home and peer through your curtain at everyone else having fun, Gladys.

OK tacky Trishia! Hope the plastic knives and napkins don't break the bank.

Look, if you've overextended yourself and can't afford the $20, just quietly let me know. I give to charity.

I'm not the one asking YOU for money. You're the one who is too stretched to host a party you can't afford. TACKY!!!!!

The poverty of your vocabulary and syntax tells me all I need to know about your upbringing.

Awwww did I strike a nerve, dear? Just don't host parties you can't afford. Makes you look classless.

Ah, you consulted a thesaurus to find another word for "TACKY!!!!" It appears I'm the one who struck a nerve.

No, just didn't think there was anything wrong with using it in the first place. Why use a different word when this one describes you so well

Your post is illogical. If you didn't think there was a point to using a different word, why did you do so? I guess we can't expect much from the Appalachian public school system...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the big deal. It's $20 a head. So what. People get worked up over nothing.

I could see $20 per family. Per person, that’s going to be $80 or $100 for a family to have burgers and still have to bring food and drinks.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't think that's unreasonable given that they are providing some food and presumably planning, setting up, and cleaning up. You can always decline to participate. You can always volunteer to plan the next one and change how it's done.

I agree. $20 is not going to cover a couple of burgers with all fixings, sides, as well as the multiple drinks most adults will consume.

Sine they ask that people bring food and drink that they'll consume, no one will eat $20 worth of burgers

Fixings, sides, napkins, cups, cutlery, soft drinks, tables, charcoal. Also she should frankly get a cut from having to deal with petty, whiny, shrews like you and OP. Just stay home and peer through your curtain at everyone else having fun, Gladys.

OK tacky Trishia! Hope the plastic knives and napkins don't break the bank.

Look, if you've overextended yourself and can't afford the $20, just quietly let me know. I give to charity.

I'm not the one asking YOU for money. You're the one who is too stretched to host a party you can't afford. TACKY!!!!!

The poverty of your vocabulary and syntax tells me all I need to know about your upbringing.

Awwww did I strike a nerve, dear? Just don't host parties you can't afford. Makes you look classless.

Ah, you consulted a thesaurus to find another word for "TACKY!!!!" It appears I'm the one who struck a nerve.

No, just didn't think there was anything wrong with using it in the first place. Why use a different word when this one describes you so well

Your post is illogical. If you didn't think there was a point to using a different word, why did you do so? I guess we can't expect much from the Appalachian public school system...

Bless your heart. You're trying really hard. I can tell.

[Anonymous]

The block party hosts in my old neighborhood used to charge, as well. The funds always went towards something fun for the party goers (raffles, etc), for the neighborhood (walking park, dog litter cans, etc) or was donated to a meaningful charity. Could this be why they are making this request?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think that's unreasonable given that they are providing some food and presumably planning, setting up, and cleaning up. You can always decline to participate. You can always volunteer to plan the next one and change how it's done.

I agree. $20 is not going to cover a couple of burgers with all fixings, sides, as well as the multiple drinks most adults will consume.

First of all, most adults eat one burger. Maybe with cheese, lettuce, tomato, onion, and a few sauces. Even if you're buying the most expensive organic meat and making huge patties, that's probably $5 a burger. Add a $1.50 brioche bun (I wouldn't but this is what some cost). Toppings, negligible, but say you buy it ALL at the farmers market and the condiments are absurd. Another $2.50. That's not even $10. Not saying that the tables/chairs/ice/etc... don't have costs, but OP did not say these things were rented.

If someone is setting up the party they can ask for help.

I personally would NEVER charge at this scale of event. I may want to purchase the meat and make some food and grill, but I would as for contributions of time or specific donations, not money. If you are in college trying to organize something or young adults, or in a different socio-economic bracket I get it. But what OP describes does strike me as odd.

[Anonymous]

My thoughts:
1. This woman/host is a classless unmannered avarice. No excuses.
2. Ask where the $20/head is going, demand transparency from these tightwads.
3. If $20/head doesn't compute, decline invite.

Bad behaviors need pushback, especially from rich mofos who should know better.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:That's hilarious OP. Years ago I was part of a group at a country club buying gifts to thank someone- can't remember if was coaches or captains or what. Some people are like private jet wealthy. The person coordinating all the money took some out to also purchase cards to put the money in. She was very diligent on accounting for every cent and how she divided it as well amongst the recipients as well. People gonna be like that and you have to just laugh.

What’s wrong with this? It’s how I do it for the teachers.

You reimburse yourself for the greeting cards? Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I live in Great Falls. Basically every single person in our neighborhood is upper middle to *very* well off. Not to mince words: these are fairly freakin' rich people.

We have no HOA. No Board. No official body.

Every year or two, someone tries to plan a "Block Party." I do not attend because every year they start by saying it's $20 a head PLUS a potluck dish PLUS BYOB. The host family provides burgers, buns, dogs, fixins, etc, there's no DJ. There's no games. There's no bar, keg, bounce house or live band. No kiddie pool or petting zoo or face painting. It's a gas grill set up in the cul de sac. . .

My question is . . . Why is it $20 a head to participate? Are they serious? Do they not see how incredibly tacky that is? How is that a "Block Party"? Literally everyone here is richer than Croesus-- and I'm not exaggerating. There are four Maserati and a Lambo in this neighborhood!!

I experienced dozens of "block parties" in Philly and Baltimore and Queens. There's no open exchange of money-- you are allowed to tip the DJ or give dough to the "board" who planned it. but in no universe do they ask you to both pay $20 *and* bring a dish *and* BYOB!

I realize this is trivial. But still, thanks for reading, I just needed to get that out.

Let's say 50 people attend at $50/per person and bring a dish and their own beverage. The host providing burgers, hot dogs, plus condiments which they purchase at Costco for $399. $800 on their lickety. I would RSVP no.

[Anonymous]

That is a lot to ask especially since guests are expected to bring a dish to share as well as their own 🍷/beverage.

And if the host family is rich this makes zero sense too.

[Anonymous]

If you are so rich, why fretting over $20? Maybe it's simply a respect thing.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's tacky at all. It covers rolls , condiments, ice and beverages. Probably pays the kids who do the set up and break down of tables and chairs.

Honestly, its pretty tacky to expect your neighbor to pay for your block party, regardless of income.

I agree. This seems normal for all the rich areas I’ve lived in.

Rich people are some of the cheapest SOBs on the planet.

This! My rule always.. Don't have a party if you can't afford it. And, I hate potlucks.