disappointed DC wants to be a teacher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher, it is difficult to hear that this is how you see us. I won’t make this reply about that though.

I would not encourage my kids to go into teaching. Not because I think it is settling or selling themselves short in any way because I don’t believe those things about teachers. I wouldn’t encourage it because the pay is not enough to support them or a family if they were to be without a partner.

If any of my kids told me they wanted to be a teacher, I would be proud of them for wanting to do meaningful work that leaves the world a better place. But I’d also encourage them to find a way to do that while earning a better income.

+ 1

My mom was a teacher and a pretty amazing one. She preferred to work in low income/high immigrant communities and dedicated her time and money to giving the best possible to her students. Parents raved about her and her students always had significant improvements in test scores. But when my niece said she wanted to be a teacher, my mom talked her out of it. She explained the job was high stress, undervalued and very underpaid. She wanted more financial stability for her granddaughter. Ultimately, my niece, who is great with kids, went into nursing and plans to work in the NICU or PICU with kids. It’s still high stress but she will be able to support herself well even without a partner.

Our high-achieving DC always wanted to be a teacher....and has been talked out of it by their esteemed teachers. And I mean that sincerely. We've been greatly blessed with an extraordinary number of extraordinary teachers. But every. single. one. has said -- don't do it.

So the pivot is to nursing, for now -- even though several close friends and family members who are nurses have likewise tried to dissuade our child. The plan is to double major in nursing and music therapy or (gasp) music education.

Strikingly, little of the advice has been because of money. It's all about the working conditions -- the hours, the stress, the heartache, the paperwork(!). Both sets acknowledge, however, there will always be a need for teachers and nurses.

It will not surprise us if, five years post BSN, our DC will be in a school. Somewhere. In the clinic, band room, or classroom. With us as their biggest cheerleaders!

OP, please try to find a way to embrace your child's path. There's nothing wrong with pointing out the potential pitfalls along the way but your issue seems more about whether the profession is good enough for your child. That's a different matter altogether.

The problem is that people in a profession often have little perspective of what other jobs are like. I've also heard many doctors and lawyers try to dissuade kids from pursuing those careers, and for similar reasons-- stress, bad employers, paperwork. Plus the high cost of the education required.

Education, by comparison, has low barriers to entry. A teaching certification takes significantly less time and money to acquire than many other professionals degrees. This makes it lower risk-- try it, if you hate it, pivot to something else. If you love it, get a master's to max out your earning. The flexibility of this path is appealing, IMO.

As for prestige... It's overrated. I'm a mid career lawyer and the prestige of a career gets undercut by your experience within it. My job sounds prestigious to outsiders and I do make a decent income. But the reality is that I'm not treated that well by my employer or my clients, I have low job satisfaction, and I only recently started seeing real financial returns on the investment in my education, because of the time it took me to pay off law school and then build up savings. And my hours are long and the job is high stress. The fact that some people are impressed that I'm a lawyer is not really worth that much to me at this point.

+1
My sister is a doctor and complains all the time. But what she tells me doesn't sound any worse than a gazillion meaningless office jobs with mediocre pay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher, it is difficult to hear that this is how you see us. I won’t make this reply about that though.

I would not encourage my kids to go into teaching. Not because I think it is settling or selling themselves short in any way because I don’t believe those things about teachers. I wouldn’t encourage it because the pay is not enough to support them or a family if they were to be without a partner.

If any of my kids told me they wanted to be a teacher, I would be proud of them for wanting to do meaningful work that leaves the world a better place. But I’d also encourage them to find a way to do that while earning a better income.

+ 1

My mom was a teacher and a pretty amazing one. She preferred to work in low income/high immigrant communities and dedicated her time and money to giving the best possible to her students. Parents raved about her and her students always had significant improvements in test scores. But when my niece said she wanted to be a teacher, my mom talked her out of it. She explained the job was high stress, undervalued and very underpaid. She wanted more financial stability for her granddaughter. Ultimately, my niece, who is great with kids, went into nursing and plans to work in the NICU or PICU with kids. It’s still high stress but she will be able to support herself well even without a partner.

Our high-achieving DC always wanted to be a teacher....and has been talked out of it by their esteemed teachers. And I mean that sincerely. We've been greatly blessed with an extraordinary number of extraordinary teachers. But every. single. one. has said -- don't do it.

So the pivot is to nursing, for now -- even though several close friends and family members who are nurses have likewise tried to dissuade our child. The plan is to double major in nursing and music therapy or (gasp) music education.

Strikingly, little of the advice has been because of money. It's all about the working conditions -- the hours, the stress, the heartache, the paperwork(!). Both sets acknowledge, however, there will always be a need for teachers and nurses.

It will not surprise us if, five years post BSN, our DC will be in a school. Somewhere. In the clinic, band room, or classroom. With us as their biggest cheerleaders!

OP, please try to find a way to embrace your child's path. There's nothing wrong with pointing out the potential pitfalls along the way but your issue seems more about whether the profession is good enough for your child. That's a different matter altogether.

The problem is that people in a profession often have little perspective of what other jobs are like. I've also heard many doctors and lawyers try to dissuade kids from pursuing those careers, and for similar reasons-- stress, bad employers, paperwork. Plus the high cost of the education required.

Education, by comparison, has low barriers to entry. A teaching certification takes significantly less time and money to acquire than many other professionals degrees. This makes it lower risk-- try it, if you hate it, pivot to something else. If you love it, get a master's to max out your earning. The flexibility of this path is appealing, IMO.

As for prestige... It's overrated. I'm a mid career lawyer and the prestige of a career gets undercut by your experience within it. My job sounds prestigious to outsiders and I do make a decent income. But the reality is that I'm not treated that well by my employer or my clients, I have low job satisfaction, and I only recently started seeing real financial returns on the investment in my education, because of the time it took me to pay off law school and then build up savings. And my hours are long and the job is high stress. The fact that some people are impressed that I'm a lawyer is not really worth that much to me at this point.

+1
My sister is a doctor and complains all the time. But what she tells me doesn't sound any worse than a gazillion meaningless office jobs with mediocre pay.

+2

[Anonymous]

Op,

It’s strange that you send your kid to a fancy school and must admire or appreciate the teachers since you are paying so much for an education. But then you look down on a profession that you are paying a lot for.

Your mind is really doing somersaults to look down on this profession.

As other teachers said, it’s not an easy job. You have to deal with rude and entitled parents for one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op,

It’s strange that you send your kid to a fancy school and must admire or appreciate the teachers since you are paying so much for an education. But then you look down on a profession that you are paying a lot for.

Your mind is really doing somersaults to look down on this profession.

As other teachers said, it’s not an easy job. You have to deal with rude and entitled parents for one.

I agree with a previous poster. If someone thinks teaching is easy, then they don’t know any or many teachers.

Get out of your bubble.

Your child is seeing one side of teaching and not all that goes on in the background when you are the teacher being treated poorly by rude admin and entitled kids and parents — as opposed to being part of the privileged group of entitled kids and parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think they did a study that many teachers are millionaires - it could be because their stable career allows them to marry someone who can work longer hours and make a good income. In a good school district, she could make low six figures, have a pension, awesome health benefits, and summers and holidays off. It can be an incredible work life balance for someone who wants a family and also wants to do rewarding work. That being said, she'd have to pick her area wisely since many teachers are currently working 60 hour weeks these days

For what it's worth, I'm an educator and a millionaire.

Yeah ... pretty sure you didn't get there on your teaching salary.

Actually I did and I make more than my husband. The trick is to work for a high paying district with great benefits, avoid student loans and get as many scholarships as possible, and invest early. It's true that the stars have to align and you have to make good choices at a young age...but it is possible.

It’s also possible if OP can help. If OP is sending kids to a fancy private school, is OP in a position to help with a downpayment etc? Teaching is not super lucrative but if you go into it w/o loans, with some savings already, a masters degree, in a relatively high paying district (with hopefully a moderate COL), AND if you have some help along the way and don’t have expensive tastes, they’ll be fine. Teachers can also supplement income with tutoring, coaching, summers and I’d encourage DC to plan to do that early on to build up savings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op,

It’s strange that you send your kid to a fancy school and must admire or appreciate the teachers since you are paying so much for an education. But then you look down on a profession that you are paying a lot for.

Your mind is really doing somersaults to look down on this profession.

As other teachers said, it’s not an easy job. You have to deal with rude and entitled parents for one.

I agree with a previous poster. If someone thinks teaching is easy, then they don’t know any or many teachers.

Get out of your bubble.

Your child is seeing one side of teaching and not all that goes on in the background when you are the teacher being treated poorly by rude admin and entitled kids and parents — as opposed to being part of the privileged group of entitled kids and parents.

+1
So well said.
How many times on DCUM does a post start about a kid being "smart, athletic, good grades" and then a question about a horrible behavior?
No one ever starts with "my kid is a big a-hole" and then the question.
Teachers see that side.