Sundays aren’t fun or relaxing anymore

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the people saying single moms have it easy must have useless husbands. Or their own standards are so low that they would feed their kids hot dogs every night of their husband wasn’t around to notice.

I’m the PP with the deployed spouse. I didn’t say it was easy being a single mom. I said it was easier in many ways though. DH is absolutely an equal partner but it’s not needing to tend to another relationship that frees up a lot of time. And we always eat good food but I’m far less picky than he is. Lots of nights when he was deployed, the kids and I would have avocado and scrambled eggs or something premade from Trader Joe’s.

But yes, my cleaning standards are and we’re lax! DH is the cleaner - not me.

Single moms date you know. They too are cultivating relationships.

I don't date. I don't have the money for a babysitter. Stop assuming things about groups of people. Most single parents do not have the money for outsourcing anything. In fact, my PT gigs are babysitting, pet sitting/dog walking, etc.

You don’t define the experience of every single mom. And yes, single moms do date, many get remarried, and single women have friendships and other platonic relationships they are working on as well, and some outsource and some don’t, and some married couples outsource and some don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the people saying single moms have it easy must have useless husbands. Or their own standards are so low that they would feed their kids hot dogs every night of their husband wasn’t around to notice.

Yup it seems like they are happy when their husband is away but don’t realize they still have the safety of still being married and a second income.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I could have written your post, OP. I am in the middle of preparing dinners for this coming week too. It sucks. I used to love cooking, too.

While the suggestions given are good, I have two issues: first, we’re vegetarian and vegetarian food isn’t that easy. Second, we have limited freezer space and no room to put a deep freezer in our city condo! I could add a third which is that my young kids are still picky eaters.

I do dread Sundays now but am so happy when I come home from work and just pop a dish in the oven while my toddler and I make a salad while I’m wearing my baby. We sit down to eat while everyone is still in a good mood and DH does clean up so I can nurse and read to my kids in peace.

I'm the same way. Also, between my vegetarianism, my kids' pickiness and DH's need for hearty dinners there aren't a lot of good options for us. I basically rotate the same 3 meals continually, with minor tweaks (pasta, veggie burgers, tacos).

This is one area where it would be easier to be a single mom bc I could just cook a giant thing of mac n cheese and we could eat it all week. That's what I do when DH is away.

Why does everyone think single moms only feed junk. Single moms don’t have picky kids? Or can’t be vegetarians?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread feels like a SNL skit. I’m a single mother and do all of that by myself. And I also find time to just unwind with a glass of wine and a movie.

It’s easier being a single mother, PP. Honestly. Your idea of cleaning standards and nutritional standards are your own. You have no other equal adult to compromise with. I could eat and serve scrambled eggs for dinner but DH needs a full balanced, vegetarian meal. I could live with crumbs on the floor but DH has to vacuum daily. There are a million things that I would let slide without DH.

+1. This really is true. Without the commitment of marriage and another relationship to tend to, I would have a lot more time!

+2. Thank you! I am so sick of the single mother whine. Being married and in a healthy relationship takes work, planning, and commitment. I could eat cold cereal for dinner and be happy with the quiet after the kids are in bed.

Jerk post. Imagine having zero breaks from childcare and being able to outsource nothing.

Who says they aren't getting childcare breaks? The single mom across the street from me has a way more active social life than any married person I know. She has 50/50 custody and gets lots of breaks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I shudder to think what old meat on Wednesday, Thursday tastes like. I can't even eat 1 day old chicken 😩

Old chicken is THE WORST. We mostly eat ground meat, so much easier to repurpose. ground turkey or beef as tacos, pasta, lettuce wraps, chilli, burgers, etc. side veggie and side carb, super easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread feels like a SNL skit. I’m a single mother and do all of that by myself. And I also find time to just unwind with a glass of wine and a movie.

It’s easier being a single mother, PP. Honestly. Your idea of cleaning standards and nutritional standards are your own. You have no other equal adult to compromise with. I could eat and serve scrambled eggs for dinner but DH needs a full balanced, vegetarian meal. I could live with crumbs on the floor but DH has to vacuum daily. There are a million things that I would let slide without DH.

+1. This really is true. Without the commitment of marriage and another relationship to tend to, I would have a lot more time!

+2. Thank you! I am so sick of the single mother whine. Being married and in a healthy relationship takes work, planning, and commitment. I could eat cold cereal for dinner and be happy with the quiet after the kids are in bed.

Jerk post. Imagine having zero breaks from childcare and being able to outsource nothing.

Who says they aren't getting childcare breaks? The single mom across the street from me has a way more active social life than any married person I know. She has 50/50 custody and gets lots of breaks.

I don't know many single moms who get breaks. If I had even a night off from parenting, I'd be one happy camper. It is very draining. It's like a marathon without any water.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread feels like a SNL skit. I’m a single mother and do all of that by myself. And I also find time to just unwind with a glass of wine and a movie.

It’s easier being a single mother, PP. Honestly. Your idea of cleaning standards and nutritional standards are your own. You have no other equal adult to compromise with. I could eat and serve scrambled eggs for dinner but DH needs a full balanced, vegetarian meal. I could live with crumbs on the floor but DH has to vacuum daily. There are a million things that I would let slide without DH.

+1. This really is true. Without the commitment of marriage and another relationship to tend to, I would have a lot more time!

+2. Thank you! I am so sick of the single mother whine. Being married and in a healthy relationship takes work, planning, and commitment. I could eat cold cereal for dinner and be happy with the quiet after the kids are in bed.

Jerk post. Imagine having zero breaks from childcare and being able to outsource nothing.

Who says they aren't getting childcare breaks? The single mom across the street from me has a way more active social life than any married person I know. She has 50/50 custody and gets lots of breaks.

I don't know many single moms who get breaks. If I had even a night off from parenting, I'd be one happy camper. It is very draining. It's like a marathon without any water.

Welcome to the single mom pity party!

[Anonymous]

Oddly, I thought about this thread all week. As I was struggling to get dinner on the table every night, I thought if OP popping one of her homemade meals in the oven and enjoy a nice dinner.

Honestly, I’m going to give the crappy Sunday a try. This is just too fricking hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the people saying single moms have it easy must have useless husbands. Or their own standards are so low that they would feed their kids hot dogs every night of their husband wasn’t around to notice.

Yup it seems like they are happy when their husband is away but don’t realize they still have the safety of still being married and a second income.

I also don’t understand why so much work goes into “tending the relationship”. Are these husbands really high maintenance?

My interactions with my husband consist of: telling each other about the work day, interesting developments with the kids, random pieces of news from our friends/family or the world, logistical things like home repair or kid pickups. It is fun to talk to each other, not a chore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread feels like a SNL skit. I’m a single mother and do all of that by myself. And I also find time to just unwind with a glass of wine and a movie.

It’s easier being a single mother, PP. Honestly. Your idea of cleaning standards and nutritional standards are your own. You have no other equal adult to compromise with. I could eat and serve scrambled eggs for dinner but DH needs a full balanced, vegetarian meal. I could live with crumbs on the floor but DH has to vacuum daily. There are a million things that I would let slide without DH.

+1. This really is true. Without the commitment of marriage and another relationship to tend to, I would have a lot more time!

+2. Thank you! I am so sick of the single mother whine. Being married and in a healthy relationship takes work, planning, and commitment. I could eat cold cereal for dinner and be happy with the quiet after the kids are in bed.

Jerk post. Imagine having zero breaks from childcare and being able to outsource nothing.

Who says they aren't getting childcare breaks? The single mom across the street from me has a way more active social life than any married person I know. She has 50/50 custody and gets lots of breaks.

Aaah this is why the term solo mom/parent was invented - there is a huge difference between 50-50 custody and being the sole person responsible for a child/children. That is my situation and there are no breaks.