Redshirting should be banned

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't redshirt my Sept birthday and I really don't care what others do. It didn't affect him. He was smart and capable all the way through HS and is thriving in college.

I can't believe someone thinks it's "aggressive behavior." It might be misguided, or unwarranted, or done out of fear, but I hardly think it's aggressive. Most people redshirt because their kid has academic and/or social issues. If they didn't, I'm sure they would be happy to have the go on time.

Sure, parents keep their kids back bc they have academic and social issues. You are so naive.

Oh, really? Sure, some may do it for sports or b/c he's short, but people are always saying on here that their kid has issues. While it may give them a "leg up" many of them still have apparent issues. I do agree that sports should go by age, but I still stand by if these boys were all that they wouldn't be held back.

Where can we meet? I want to sell you a bridge.

I don't need a bridge because I'm not obsessed like you. My kid is ALL THAT and he was fine as the youngest boy in the class. It wasn't ever a problem. Not once.

Sweetheart, you said people redshirt because of issues because they say so. Time for you to learn that all kids at that age have issues.

If a child is "mature" or perfectly behaved at age 5, I'd worry something is going on as well. No kids are mature or perfectly behaved at age 5 nor should they be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back in the ‘80s kids found it embarrassing to be so much older than the others. It meant you weren’t that bright.

That was only the kids who had to repeat a grade. If you repeated 3rd grade, everyone knew it. If you started kindergarten at 6, nobody noticed or cared.

Uh, everyone knows how old kids are when they start going to birthday parties. I'm not saying it's a problem, but this is false.

Uh nobody makes fun of kids at their birthday parties. This is a sick fantasy often repeated here that the older kids are social outcasts. Because sane people don't care about which kid turns 6 first in kindergarten. Are you the psycho who memorizes all the birthdays?

It’s not hard to know who is redshirted. Noon has to “memorize birthdays,” fantasizer.

Ok I guess in bizarro world this is a problem for you and you don't allow your kid to go to parties if you deem the child "too old". Whatever. Hope your kid enjoys sitting at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not reading all the pages. Has anyone suggested the schools quit expecting kids to learn how to read and count in Kindergarten? They're babies. This has nothing to do with intelligence and everything to do with maturity. Some kids are ready in K, others are not.

This has nothing to do with maturity. Part intelligence and part being taught. I have a young for the grade child who had no issue learning to read before age 4 and they had significant developmental delays. We put child in academically enriched preschools, got the appropriate therapies and worked with the child at home. Its perfectly fine for kids not to read or count at age 5 and that's why you are sending them to school. They are no longer babies and you saying they are is the problem. Stop dumbing down expectations. If there is a learning disability, its important to catch it early and provide additional support, not just a wait and see approach, especially for reading which is the foundation for everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You would probably have judged us this way, OP. We held our Sept boy back. He was fine academically and behaviorally in school. But what you wouldn’t have seen is that at home he was an emotional mess. I suspected he inherited my ADHD yet we weren’t able to get an evaluation until he was in 2nd grade and yes it was confirmed. Not everything is as it seems to you. If we didn’t hold him back it would’ve been a disaster.

I am unclear why his being an emotional mess at home would indicate that he should be redshirted at school, particularly if he had no academic or behavioral issues while he was at school? Why would it have been a disaster? It sounds like he had home issues regardless of whether you held him or not. Makes no sense.

Really PP? You can’t see how an immature kid would benefit from an extra year? How having play dates not be a total disaster might help? Ok. Again, from a parent with a neurotypical kid. That’s fine, but just realize others’ experiences are not always as easy as yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anti-redshirters would still be complaining if I sent my late August kid on time. He is very far from being able to read, not emotionally ready to sit still and be quiet all day. He has been a little late with almost every milestone and is tiny for his age. You’d all be complaining about how the teacher spends too much time focusing on the students that are struggling and that school isn’t challenging enough for your precocious Larla.

And give me a break with the “this is only an option for the UMC.” I bet the anti-redshirters on this thread send their kids to school with extremely low poverty rates and don’t care what is happening at high poverty schools. I kind of doubt UMC redshirting 4 year olds with summer birthdays is a high priority concern for high poverty schools.

I’m a summer birthday who went on time to Title I schools. I did fine. I remember being behind in reading until second grade and struggling. I also know that they expect more from kindergarteners now than they did when I was growing up. I know my kid best and know that he would not be fine right now starting kindergarten. He would struggle far more than I did. Let parents make the best choices for their kids.

Its perfectly fine for him to need a bit of extra help and support. Delaying K is not helping him if he's struggling and you aren't getting outside help. He's not expected to sit and be quiet all day. You are the one with unrealistic expectations and if you know that there are learning struggles in your family, instead of ignoring it get him assessed and work with him or get him outside help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A parent's job is to give their child as many advantages as they can afford. Otherwise, they're not doing their job as a parent.

Then, you get your child privately evaluated, private therapies and private tutoring if you can afford it vs. ignoring the issue and holding your child back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You would probably have judged us this way, OP. We held our Sept boy back. He was fine academically and behaviorally in school. But what you wouldn’t have seen is that at home he was an emotional mess. I suspected he inherited my ADHD yet we weren’t able to get an evaluation until he was in 2nd grade and yes it was confirmed. Not everything is as it seems to you. If we didn’t hold him back it would’ve been a disaster.

You could get him evaluated and choose not to. You are making excuses. We saw our child had delays as a toddler through elementary school. We spent a fortune on private evaluations and services to get out child caught up and still sent them early. The disaster was you ignoring it and expecting the schoo to fix it vs getting that child help. B

That’s a cute post. You obvious come from money and don’t have ADHD. Get bent.

One can get an evaluation. That is on you. Get straight with your excuse making.

Where did I say that it was out of my control? I simply said it wasn’t until grade 2. Yes I have ADHD, depression, and am struggling raising a family while working. I’m super happy for you that you can’t relate, but you sound like a totally ignorant arsehole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A parent's job is to give their child as many advantages as they can afford. Otherwise, they're not doing their job as a parent.

Then, you get your child privately evaluated, private therapies and private tutoring if you can afford it vs. ignoring the issue and holding your child back.

I can’t afford it, friend. That was the damn point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back in the ‘80s kids found it embarrassing to be so much older than the others. It meant you weren’t that bright.

That was only the kids who had to repeat a grade. If you repeated 3rd grade, everyone knew it. If you started kindergarten at 6, nobody noticed or cared.

Uh, everyone knows how old kids are when they start going to birthday parties. I'm not saying it's a problem, but this is false.

Uh nobody makes fun of kids at their birthday parties. This is a sick fantasy often repeated here that the older kids are social outcasts. Because sane people don't care about which kid turns 6 first in kindergarten. Are you the psycho who memorizes all the birthdays?

It’s not hard to know who is redshirted. Noon has to “memorize birthdays,” fantasizer.

Ok I guess in bizarro world this is a problem for you and you don't allow your kid to go to parties if you deem the child "too old". Whatever. Hope your kid enjoys sitting at home.

Another one of your fantasies that you stew at thinking up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back in the ‘80s kids found it embarrassing to be so much older than the others. It meant you weren’t that bright.

That was only the kids who had to repeat a grade. If you repeated 3rd grade, everyone knew it. If you started kindergarten at 6, nobody noticed or cared.

Uh, everyone knows how old kids are when they start going to birthday parties. I'm not saying it's a problem, but this is false.

Uh nobody makes fun of kids at their birthday parties. This is a sick fantasy often repeated here that the older kids are social outcasts. Because sane people don't care about which kid turns 6 first in kindergarten. Are you the psycho who memorizes all the birthdays?

It’s not hard to know who is redshirted. Noon has to “memorize birthdays,” fantasizer.

Ok I guess in bizarro world this is a problem for you and you don't allow your kid to go to parties if you deem the child "too old". Whatever. Hope your kid enjoys sitting at home.

Another one of your fantasies that you stew at thinking up.

You're the one who brought up birthday parties. Why bring it up if it's not an issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back in the ‘80s kids found it embarrassing to be so much older than the others. It meant you weren’t that bright.

That was only the kids who had to repeat a grade. If you repeated 3rd grade, everyone knew it. If you started kindergarten at 6, nobody noticed or cared.

Uh, everyone knows how old kids are when they start going to birthday parties. I'm not saying it's a problem, but this is false.

Uh nobody makes fun of kids at their birthday parties. This is a sick fantasy often repeated here that the older kids are social outcasts. Because sane people don't care about which kid turns 6 first in kindergarten. Are you the psycho who memorizes all the birthdays?

It’s not hard to know who is redshirted. Noon has to “memorize birthdays,” fantasizer.

Ok I guess in bizarro world this is a problem for you and you don't allow your kid to go to parties if you deem the child "too old". Whatever. Hope your kid enjoys sitting at home.

I hate to burst yet another one of your fantasies, but I didn’t write the birthday post. Maybe you’re not aware that many people can post on here.


Another one of your fantasies that you stew at thinking up.

You're the one who brought up birthday parties. Why bring it up if it's not an issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back in the ‘80s kids found it embarrassing to be so much older than the others. It meant you weren’t that bright.

That was only the kids who had to repeat a grade. If you repeated 3rd grade, everyone knew it. If you started kindergarten at 6, nobody noticed or cared.

Uh, everyone knows how old kids are when they start going to birthday parties. I'm not saying it's a problem, but this is false.

Uh nobody makes fun of kids at their birthday parties. This is a sick fantasy often repeated here that the older kids are social outcasts. Because sane people don't care about which kid turns 6 first in kindergarten. Are you the psycho who memorizes all the birthdays?

It’s not hard to know who is redshirted. Noon has to “memorize birthdays,” fantasizer.

Ok I guess in bizarro world this is a problem for you and you don't allow your kid to go to parties if you deem the child "too old". Whatever. Hope your kid enjoys sitting at home.

I hate to burst yet another one of your fantasies, but I didn’t write the birthday post. Maybe you’re not aware that many people can post on here.


Another one of your fantasies that you stew at thinking up.

You're the one who brought up birthday parties. Why bring it up if it's not an issue?

Hate to burst another fantasy of yours, I did not write the bday post. Many can post on here, you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You would probably have judged us this way, OP. We held our Sept boy back. He was fine academically and behaviorally in school. But what you wouldn’t have seen is that at home he was an emotional mess. I suspected he inherited my ADHD yet we weren’t able to get an evaluation until he was in 2nd grade and yes it was confirmed. Not everything is as it seems to you. If we didn’t hold him back it would’ve been a disaster.

I am unclear why his being an emotional mess at home would indicate that he should be redshirted at school, particularly if he had no academic or behavioral issues while he was at school? Why would it have been a disaster? It sounds like he had home issues regardless of whether you held him or not. Makes no sense.

Really PP? You can’t see how an immature kid would benefit from an extra year? How having play dates not be a total disaster might help? Ok. Again, from a parent with a neurotypical kid. That’s fine, but just realize others’ experiences are not always as easy as yours.

Every kid that age is immature.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you feel so strongly about it the. You should lobby to get the rules changed because right now it is a legitimate option for parents. Personally I think fluidity with admissions is good so that families can make the decision to start that makes the most sense for their family and their child. And, apparently most school systems in the DMV agree with me since there are mechanisms to start your child early, on time and a year later.

You missed the part of the OP that talks about how this is only an option for families that can afford to delay their child’s school start. So the current system does not afford flexibility to families. It affords flexibility to families who already benefit from having more resources, so that not only do their kids have a resource advantage but they are also bigger and more developmentally advanced than their peers. It simply compounds existing inequalities.

I didn’t miss that part at all. But the reality is that many things are available to only those who can afford them. Like mental health care. Do i think that’s ok? No. I’d prefer greater access to that as well as more affordable childcare options. That fluidity is not an option for all does not mean it should not be an option for any.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree. There are kids 1.5 years older than my august boy. It's ridiculous

Really? 1.5 years? So there are kids in your kid's class who were redshirted March bdays? That's insane. I've never heard of anyone redshirting unless they were July-September bdays. Maybe one June bday.