This is the best response ever and totally worth reading through the other dribble to find. |
| Protecting his brain and his capacity for emotional and behavioral self-regulation. After that it’s all him. |
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The biggest predictor of the kind of future your kid has is just your current lifestyle--which you inherited from your own parents. That's pretty much it.
Are you a lawyer? Congratulations, your kid is probably going to be a lawyer, too. Your kid's preschool, elementary school, high school, and even college doesn't particularly matter. |
| I have a daughter. I will get her LARBC when she is old enough and teach her to value herself highly. What ruins women’s lives isn’t too much screen tiMe or insufficient basket weaving, it’s relationships with unsuitable men and lifetime bonds to them represented by children. |
What is LARBC? Do you mean some form of birth control? Honestly, my first marriage was the single greatest hardship of my life. I can't imagine anything other than the death of a child being more physically, financially and psychologically ruinous, so heck, I agree with your comment. |
Long-acting reversible birth control— IUD, implant, whatever her doctor advises and she’s comfortable with, but something error proof. You are one of many women who have that experience (my sister— her aunt— is one as well) and what I have learned is behind every woman who has serious life hardship there is a man who went to great lengths to misrepresent who he was. The problem is once women have children they cannot escape these men. I’m really glad you got out of your marriage!!!!! |
| People have different definitions of success. Mine would be successfully teaching him empathy, conscientiousness, patience, gratefulness, and kindness. Hoping he learns to value people more than money. |
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Gave birth in the US, carried to term (despite all the induction talk) and breastfed, stayed home with him until 3 yo, did all the usual bells and whistles of enrichment. We live in an area with so many educated people. He will get some hooks for college as in he will be low income and maybe even first Gen.
He is a pretty average kid and I think he has received more than enough head start compared to kids of my neighbors and classmates in the old country. The rest is on him. |
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My job is/was to get my kids to be independent contributors to society. It was not guaranteed as one low support ASD and one has multiple severe LDs. The older one with ASD is moving to their own apartment next week and has been working at the same job since college graduation, two years ago. The younger one is starting a PhD program this fall ( the independence jury is still out for five more years). All it took was my career and 25 years. S/
It took much more time and parenting than was advertised. It has been a very long very slow slog. |
Aren’t the last two major disadvantages nowadays? |
It’s not an advantage anymore I am afraid |
I mean not unless you care about statistics. |