Relocating to DC...what's life like?

[Anonymous]

OP, we just moved from NW DC to Bethesda MD.
I you want to live in NW DC, I would recommend looking at Mann, Janney, Hearst, Eaton and Murch-zoned properties. My kids went to Mann and it's a very good school. WE moved to Bethesda MD for more space and stronger middle and high schools. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm a DC near-native who moved away for ~20 years (including abroad) and moved back ten years ago. Some observations to add to the more thoughtful posts above:

DC has a reputation as a city of transients, but that's mostly a sense you'll get from other youngish transplants who moved here for jobs and met people who did likewise, so a lot of confirmation bias in that view. There are a lot of neighborhoods with long-established, multigenerational families who look out for each other, a vibe you'll find especially but definitely not exclusively in the historically Black neighborhoods east of the Park.

Although DC has grown in population a lot in the last decade, it still feels like a manageable-size city, in which by getting involved in your neighborhood you can find yourself connected to people in local politics and activism and in all kinds of cool jobs. People I meet at neighborhood activities include my Councilperson, the head of a Smithsonian museum, somebody who does cool stuff at NOAA, somebody (not the Councilperson) who's very good at getting the city to fix stuff, several artists and somebody who runs a gallery, lots of people who work in the public and charter schools, several Foreign Service Officers, several architects, several authors...and surprisingly few lawyers, come to think of it, though I grew up in an all-lawyer neighborhood across town.

Things that have changed for the better since I went away in the early '90s: more good food all over, and you don't have to go to the trendy places to find it. There are lots of neighborhood amenities in many DC neighborhoods, the sort of places you run into neighbors. Neighborhood libraries and parks constantly getting upgrades or being built anew, which was inconceivable in the 80s-90s.

Things that have gotten worse: Traffic, of course, and the state of Metro, which has lost its sheen. People have gotten pushier and more stressed, for reasons that are broader than DC-specific pressures but are probably exacerbated by the types of jobs people come here for. I really don't see this in my neighborhood, but I notice it in public spaces in the lawyer-heavy neighborhoods I grew up in. Admittedly, some of what I remember is the remnant of DC's (in)famous Southern charm, which went along with a lot of bad things (segregation) but also reflected a less-pressured time in many people's lives.

Final thoughts: When I come back from New York or London, both of which I love, I still take a big breath of relaxation at how exhausting DC ISN'T, because it's so easy to step outside into the respite of green space or pause in parks or cafes on your rambles. Or pop into a museum or stroll the Zoo at lunch or go for just one exhibit because it's free and you don't have to get your money's worth. Or cross the Potomac to walk around Old Town Alexandria and appreciate an 18th-c. city with a real riverfront. Or walk or bike or bus around town and have beautiful architecture to admire. Or just sit on your porch and wave at your neighbors: DC is a city of great porches, an underappreciated feature that is great any time but has been a godsend in the pandemic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hello,

We are likely relocating to DC in the summer 2022 from Wisconsin. We have lived in several cities before, including Hong Kong and London, however, each city has their vibe. Can anyone share what the overall feeling is in the district, such as is it friendly, fast-paced, open to meeting transplants, kid-friendly, etc. What should I be aware of before coming? Will probably focus on finding a house in NW quadrant for kid's schools.

Thanks!

OP, I really truly wish you the best. I, myself, am from the midwest and have met many midwesterners in DC. The area is full of transplants...but no...it's not a friendly area by any definition.

I don't think you can say that about everyone. Maybe it is where you are that they aren't friendly?

Also, people from the midwest maybe friendly but, they never really let you in.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Check out Mt Pleasant! You have the zoo, walking distance to loads of neighborhoods, good schools, super friendly. Or Kalorama. I think both neighborhoods have a great feel.

Some recent sales that might have been a good fit.

https://www.redfin.com/DC/Washington/2026-Klingle-Rd-NW-20010/home/10009019?600390594=copy_variant&231528114=variant&utm_source=ios_share&utm_medium=share&utm_nooverride=1&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=share_sheet
https://www.redfin.com/DC/Washington/1825-Monroe-St-NW-20010/home/10010071?600390594=copy_variant&231528114=variant&utm_source=ios_share&utm_medium=share&utm_nooverride=1&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=share_sheet
https://www.redfin.com/DC/Washington/2430-20th-St-NW-20009/home/10001473?600390594=copy_variant&231528114=variant&utm_source=ios_share&utm_medium=share&utm_nooverride=1&utm_content=link&utm_campaign=share_sheet

[Anonymous]

A SAHM who can afford a 1.8M property. And you've moved a lot. Will you move again pretty soon?

Just make sure you're happy with the schools. DC schools are hate it/love it. You really do need to know exactly what to look for in DC schools to be happy with your decision. It's easier to move to Bethesda/CC or Arlington and not have to think twice about the schools or worry about lottery.

I've lived overseas, including in major cities, and am now back in the US. It's always about taking advantage of what's on offer, not trying to recreate a previous lifestyle that really isn't doable in your current city. DC is not London or HK, but it's DC with its own advantages. On a personal level I find DC too utterly dominated by well-off urban progressives that the place has little personality and is increasingly same-same anywhere, just in different architecture. Packed with people consumed by righteous thinking and social justice but who instead have created an artificial bubble so far removed from the realities of most of America that it's eye-rolling. The suburbs are increasingly where the real diversity of different people and personalities because they've all been priced out of most of DC. That's just what it is. I'm sure you'd be very happy with the bohemian bougie coffee shop culture and identikit boutiques and hipster bistros of DC. No knock or sneer, just a realistic observation. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A SAHM who can afford a 1.8M property. And you've moved a lot. Will you move again pretty soon?

Just make sure you're happy with the schools. DC schools are hate it/love it. You really do need to know exactly what to look for in DC schools to be happy with your decision. It's easier to move to Bethesda/CC or Arlington and not have to think twice about the schools or worry about lottery.

I've lived overseas, including in major cities, and am now back in the US. It's always about taking advantage of what's on offer, not trying to recreate a previous lifestyle that really isn't doable in your current city. DC is not London or HK, but it's DC with its own advantages. On a personal level I find DC too utterly dominated by well-off urban progressives that the place has little personality and is increasingly same-same anywhere, just in different architecture. Packed with people consumed by righteous thinking and social justice but who instead have created an artificial bubble so far removed from the realities of most of America that it's eye-rolling. The suburbs are increasingly where the real diversity of different people and personalities because they've all been priced out of most of DC. That's just what it is. I'm sure you'd be very happy with the bohemian bougie coffee shop culture and identikit boutiques and hipster bistros of DC. No knock or sneer, just a realistic observation. Good luck.

NP. I was with you until you had to throw in your snotty remark to the OP at the end. Of course it's a knock or a sneer to say you're sure that she'll be happy with the bolded, based on the way you said it. You're the type of person that people on DCUM always complain about when grumbling about DC. You could have said all of that without the dig.

[Anonymous]

I love DC and I am not a lawyer or involved in politics. I work for a non-profit and my DH is a teacher. I plan to be SAHM when our kids are born. I already know plenty of SAHM in my neighborhood. I do know people like others describe, but generally they are not in my close circle. You choose your circle and it can be however you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm a DC near-native who moved away for ~20 years (including abroad) and moved back ten years ago. Some observations to add to the more thoughtful posts above:

DC has a reputation as a city of transients, but that's mostly a sense you'll get from other youngish transplants who moved here for jobs and met people who did likewise, so a lot of confirmation bias in that view. There are a lot of neighborhoods with long-established, multigenerational families who look out for each other, a vibe you'll find especially but definitely not exclusively in the historically Black neighborhoods east of the Park.

Although DC has grown in population a lot in the last decade, it still feels like a manageable-size city, in which by getting involved in your neighborhood you can find yourself connected to people in local politics and activism and in all kinds of cool jobs. People I meet at neighborhood activities include my Councilperson, the head of a Smithsonian museum, somebody who does cool stuff at NOAA, somebody (not the Councilperson) who's very good at getting the city to fix stuff, several artists and somebody who runs a gallery, lots of people who work in the public and charter schools, several Foreign Service Officers, several architects, several authors...and surprisingly few lawyers, come to think of it, though I grew up in an all-lawyer neighborhood across town.

Things that have changed for the better since I went away in the early '90s: more good food all over, and you don't have to go to the trendy places to find it. There are lots of neighborhood amenities in many DC neighborhoods, the sort of places you run into neighbors. Neighborhood libraries and parks constantly getting upgrades or being built anew, which was inconceivable in the 80s-90s.

Things that have gotten worse: Traffic, of course, and the state of Metro, which has lost its sheen. People have gotten pushier and more stressed, for reasons that are broader than DC-specific pressures but are probably exacerbated by the types of jobs people come here for. I really don't see this in my neighborhood, but I notice it in public spaces in the lawyer-heavy neighborhoods I grew up in. Admittedly, some of what I remember is the remnant of DC's (in)famous Southern charm, which went along with a lot of bad things (segregation) but also reflected a less-pressured time in many people's lives.

Final thoughts: When I come back from New York or London, both of which I love, I still take a big breath of relaxation at how exhausting DC ISN'T, because it's so easy to step outside into the respite of green space or pause in parks or cafes on your rambles. Or pop into a museum or stroll the Zoo at lunch or go for just one exhibit because it's free and you don't have to get your money's worth. Or cross the Potomac to walk around Old Town Alexandria and appreciate an 18th-c. city with a real riverfront. Or walk or bike or bus around town and have beautiful architecture to admire. Or just sit on your porch and wave at your neighbors: DC is a city of great porches, an underappreciated feature that is great any time but has been a godsend in the pandemic.

This is spot-on with my experience, right down to the comment about the porches. DC is absolutely the kind of place where, if you want to be stressed and competitive, you have ample opportunity to do so. And in this country, stress and competition is so often the reward for taking a higher-earning job. So, if you just go around looking at the wealthiest and flashiest neighborhoods, you will find plenty of those folks, because they're the ones who made the choices that allow them to afford it. It's true everywhere, but it's extra noticeable here because DC has a lot of high earning jobs. And, DCUM is a magnet for that demographic.

But what makes DC special is that it has such a concentration of people who are smart, educated, interested in making a difference in the world, but also in many cases just as interested in finding a reasonable balance and living a good life as in maximizing their earning potential. That's a hard row to hoe in a lot of cities, but DC is strong in a lot of the industries where you can still make that happen without giving up a middle class life in a high COL city. Things like think tanks, nonprofits, and of course the Federal government. I'm a Fed in an agency with lots of smart people with graduate degrees, and it's practically our sales pitch; we routinely hire people who take us over job offers that pay many tens of thousands more.

The trick, in my experience, is to find the neighborhoods where these folks live. It's getting harder for many people to afford the classic DC rowhouse neighborhoods, but I think they're still your best bet.

[Anonymous]

OP, are you wedded to DC? As a person who loved living in London, I'd strongly suggest going back there if you can. London is a much nicer place to raise kids (and I say this as a mom who spent time in both cities with small children).

DC is perfectly fine, but I'd rather live in Chicago if I wanted to prioritize living in a city.

[Anonymous]

People are wildly insecure and generally were a big fish in a small pond wherever they came from, so between being insecure and thinking they're hot sh*t, there's a ton of posturing and "mean girl" crap by grown women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A SAHM who can afford a 1.8M property. And you've moved a lot. Will you move again pretty soon?

Just make sure you're happy with the schools. DC schools are hate it/love it. You really do need to know exactly what to look for in DC schools to be happy with your decision. It's easier to move to Bethesda/CC or Arlington and not have to think twice about the schools or worry about lottery.

I've lived overseas, including in major cities, and am now back in the US. It's always about taking advantage of what's on offer, not trying to recreate a previous lifestyle that really isn't doable in your current city. DC is not London or HK, but it's DC with its own advantages. On a personal level I find DC too utterly dominated by well-off urban progressives that the place has little personality and is increasingly same-same anywhere, just in different architecture. Packed with people consumed by righteous thinking and social justice but who instead have created an artificial bubble so far removed from the realities of most of America that it's eye-rolling. The suburbs are increasingly where the real diversity of different people and personalities because they've all been priced out of most of DC. That's just what it is. I'm sure you'd be very happy with the bohemian bougie coffee shop culture and identikit boutiques and hipster bistros of DC. No knock or sneer, just a realistic observation. Good luck.

NP. I was with you until you had to throw in your snotty remark to the OP at the end. Of course it's a knock or a sneer to say you're sure that she'll be happy with the bolded, based on the way you said it. You're the type of person that people on DCUM always complain about when grumbling about DC. You could have said all of that without the dig.

Hah, I was afraid someone would come back and bite me for the statement. I frequently patronize those coffeeshops (they make danged good coffee, admittedly). And it's a very pleasant lifestyle, which is heavily greased by having money. No shame in it either. I don't moralize. Perhaps just a bit dispassionate. So many of the urban areas, including even in London (perhaps especially London) that used to be known and attractive for having sheer diversity of different types of people and identities and little communities with interesting histories and ethnicities with idiosyncratic shops and restaurants, have increasingly all morphed into the same-same affluent progressive bourgie places. Seeing the same kinds of coffee shops and bistros and shops in London and Paris and Boston and SF and DC represents the homogenization of global affluence culture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm a DC near-native who moved away for ~20 years (including abroad) and moved back ten years ago. Some observations to add to the more thoughtful posts above:

DC has a reputation as a city of transients, but that's mostly a sense you'll get from other youngish transplants who moved here for jobs and met people who did likewise, so a lot of confirmation bias in that view. There are a lot of neighborhoods with long-established, multigenerational families who look out for each other, a vibe you'll find especially but definitely not exclusively in the historically Black neighborhoods east of the Park.

Although DC has grown in population a lot in the last decade, it still feels like a manageable-size city, in which by getting involved in your neighborhood you can find yourself connected to people in local politics and activism and in all kinds of cool jobs. People I meet at neighborhood activities include my Councilperson, the head of a Smithsonian museum, somebody who does cool stuff at NOAA, somebody (not the Councilperson) who's very good at getting the city to fix stuff, several artists and somebody who runs a gallery, lots of people who work in the public and charter schools, several Foreign Service Officers, several architects, several authors...and surprisingly few lawyers, come to think of it, though I grew up in an all-lawyer neighborhood across town.

Things that have changed for the better since I went away in the early '90s: more good food all over, and you don't have to go to the trendy places to find it. There are lots of neighborhood amenities in many DC neighborhoods, the sort of places you run into neighbors. Neighborhood libraries and parks constantly getting upgrades or being built anew, which was inconceivable in the 80s-90s.

Things that have gotten worse: Traffic, of course, and the state of Metro, which has lost its sheen. People have gotten pushier and more stressed, for reasons that are broader than DC-specific pressures but are probably exacerbated by the types of jobs people come here for. I really don't see this in my neighborhood, but I notice it in public spaces in the lawyer-heavy neighborhoods I grew up in. Admittedly, some of what I remember is the remnant of DC's (in)famous Southern charm, which went along with a lot of bad things (segregation) but also reflected a less-pressured time in many people's lives.

Final thoughts: When I come back from New York or London, both of which I love, I still take a big breath of relaxation at how exhausting DC ISN'T, because it's so easy to step outside into the respite of green space or pause in parks or cafes on your rambles. Or pop into a museum or stroll the Zoo at lunch or go for just one exhibit because it's free and you don't have to get your money's worth. Or cross the Potomac to walk around Old Town Alexandria and appreciate an 18th-c. city with a real riverfront. Or walk or bike or bus around town and have beautiful architecture to admire. Or just sit on your porch and wave at your neighbors: DC is a city of great porches, an underappreciated feature that is great any time but has been a godsend in the pandemic.

This is spot-on with my experience, right down to the comment about the porches. DC is absolutely the kind of place where, if you want to be stressed and competitive, you have ample opportunity to do so. And in this country, stress and competition is so often the reward for taking a higher-earning job. So, if you just go around looking at the wealthiest and flashiest neighborhoods, you will find plenty of those folks, because they're the ones who made the choices that allow them to afford it. It's true everywhere, but it's extra noticeable here because DC has a lot of high earning jobs. And, DCUM is a magnet for that demographic.

But what makes DC special is that it has such a concentration of people who are smart, educated, interested in making a difference in the world, but also in many cases just as interested in finding a reasonable balance and living a good life as in maximizing their earning potential. That's a hard row to hoe in a lot of cities, but DC is strong in a lot of the industries where you can still make that happen without giving up a middle class life in a high COL city. Things like think tanks, nonprofits, and of course the Federal government. I'm a Fed in an agency with lots of smart people with graduate degrees, and it's practically our sales pitch; we routinely hire people who take us over job offers that pay many tens of thousands more.

The trick, in my experience, is to find the neighborhoods where these folks live. It's getting harder for many people to afford the classic DC rowhouse neighborhoods, but I think they're still your best bet.

+1. My family goes back generations in DC, and I've lived in DC, MD and VA.

The people who think DC is transient are from aways themselves. When you get out of Upper Caucasia, you'll find lots of people who go back generations here. And they're friendly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A SAHM who can afford a 1.8M property. And you've moved a lot. Will you move again pretty soon?

Just make sure you're happy with the schools. DC schools are hate it/love it. You really do need to know exactly what to look for in DC schools to be happy with your decision. It's easier to move to Bethesda/CC or Arlington and not have to think twice about the schools or worry about lottery.

I've lived overseas, including in major cities, and am now back in the US. It's always about taking advantage of what's on offer, not trying to recreate a previous lifestyle that really isn't doable in your current city. DC is not London or HK, but it's DC with its own advantages. On a personal level I find DC too utterly dominated by well-off urban progressives that the place has little personality and is increasingly same-same anywhere, just in different architecture. Packed with people consumed by righteous thinking and social justice but who instead have created an artificial bubble so far removed from the realities of most of America that it's eye-rolling. The suburbs are increasingly where the real diversity of different people and personalities because they've all been priced out of most of DC. That's just what it is. I'm sure you'd be very happy with the bohemian bougie coffee shop culture and identikit boutiques and hipster bistros of DC. No knock or sneer, just a realistic observation. Good luck.

Many in the close-in suburbs aren't priced out of most of DC, but instead wanted to create a bit more distance between themselves and the "well-off urban progressives" that you describe earlier in your post. Of course, they then end up in neighborhoods with "well-off suburban liberals" instead, but the bubble is perhaps not quite as inflated. But you don't get the streetscape that appeals to bougie tastes like an urban neighborhood might.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hello,

We are likely relocating to DC in the summer 2022 from Wisconsin. We have lived in several cities before, including Hong Kong and London, however, each city has their vibe. Can anyone share what the overall feeling is in the district, such as is it friendly, fast-paced, open to meeting transplants, kid-friendly, etc. What should I be aware of before coming? Will probably focus on finding a house in NW quadrant for kid's schools.

Thanks!

OP, I really truly wish you the best. I, myself, am from the midwest and have met many midwesterners in DC. The area is full of transplants...but no...it's not a friendly area by any definition.

I don't think you can say that about everyone. Maybe it is where you are that they aren't friendly?

Agree. Some neighborhoods are very friendly. I think part of it is where you live and part of it is what industry you work in and whether you're a "striver" or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm a DC near-native who moved away for ~20 years (including abroad) and moved back ten years ago. Some observations to add to the more thoughtful posts above:

DC has a reputation as a city of transients, but that's mostly a sense you'll get from other youngish transplants who moved here for jobs and met people who did likewise, so a lot of confirmation bias in that view. There are a lot of neighborhoods with long-established, multigenerational families who look out for each other, a vibe you'll find especially but definitely not exclusively in the historically Black neighborhoods east of the Park.

Although DC has grown in population a lot in the last decade, it still feels like a manageable-size city, in which by getting involved in your neighborhood you can find yourself connected to people in local politics and activism and in all kinds of cool jobs. People I meet at neighborhood activities include my Councilperson, the head of a Smithsonian museum, somebody who does cool stuff at NOAA, somebody (not the Councilperson) who's very good at getting the city to fix stuff, several artists and somebody who runs a gallery, lots of people who work in the public and charter schools, several Foreign Service Officers, several architects, several authors...and surprisingly few lawyers, come to think of it, though I grew up in an all-lawyer neighborhood across town.

Things that have changed for the better since I went away in the early '90s: more good food all over, and you don't have to go to the trendy places to find it. There are lots of neighborhood amenities in many DC neighborhoods, the sort of places you run into neighbors. Neighborhood libraries and parks constantly getting upgrades or being built anew, which was inconceivable in the 80s-90s.

Things that have gotten worse: Traffic, of course, and the state of Metro, which has lost its sheen. People have gotten pushier and more stressed, for reasons that are broader than DC-specific pressures but are probably exacerbated by the types of jobs people come here for. I really don't see this in my neighborhood, but I notice it in public spaces in the lawyer-heavy neighborhoods I grew up in. Admittedly, some of what I remember is the remnant of DC's (in)famous Southern charm, which went along with a lot of bad things (segregation) but also reflected a less-pressured time in many people's lives.

Final thoughts: When I come back from New York or London, both of which I love, I still take a big breath of relaxation at how exhausting DC ISN'T, because it's so easy to step outside into the respite of green space or pause in parks or cafes on your rambles. Or pop into a museum or stroll the Zoo at lunch or go for just one exhibit because it's free and you don't have to get your money's worth. Or cross the Potomac to walk around Old Town Alexandria and appreciate an 18th-c. city with a real riverfront. Or walk or bike or bus around town and have beautiful architecture to admire. Or just sit on your porch and wave at your neighbors: DC is a city of great porches, an underappreciated feature that is great any time but has been a godsend in the pandemic.

This is spot-on with my experience, right down to the comment about the porches. DC is absolutely the kind of place where, if you want to be stressed and competitive, you have ample opportunity to do so. And in this country, stress and competition is so often the reward for taking a higher-earning job. So, if you just go around looking at the wealthiest and flashiest neighborhoods, you will find plenty of those folks, because they're the ones who made the choices that allow them to afford it. It's true everywhere, but it's extra noticeable here because DC has a lot of high earning jobs. And, DCUM is a magnet for that demographic.

But what makes DC special is that it has such a concentration of people who are smart, educated, interested in making a difference in the world, but also in many cases just as interested in finding a reasonable balance and living a good life as in maximizing their earning potential. That's a hard row to hoe in a lot of cities, but DC is strong in a lot of the industries where you can still make that happen without giving up a middle class life in a high COL city. Things like think tanks, nonprofits, and of course the Federal government. I'm a Fed in an agency with lots of smart people with graduate degrees, and it's practically our sales pitch; we routinely hire people who take us over job offers that pay many tens of thousands more.

The trick, in my experience, is to find the neighborhoods where these folks live. It's getting harder for many people to afford the classic DC rowhouse neighborhoods, but I think they're still your best bet.

+1. My family goes back generations in DC, and I've lived in DC, MD and VA.

The people who think DC is transient are from aways themselves. When you get out of Upper Caucasia, you'll find lots of people who go back generations here. And they're friendly.

Agreed. In my experience, Black neighborhoods are friendlier on the whole. I've heard that's because the Black population moved up here generations ago from the South. Whatever, as a White person, I learned to say hello to people on the street once I moved into a Black neighborhood.