Hypermobility? What are your rules for your super flexible child?

[Anonymous]

I have a 5th grade girl who can move her body almost like a contortionist. Examples are splits, something she calls the needle (one leg straight up), various flips and shoulder stands. There is a chin stand she does where her feet go over her head. Do people actually let their kids do this stuff? I want her to stop - it looks bad for her back and joints. She has always been flexible, but things have gotten much more extreme this year.

I plan to ask her doctor at the next check up.

[Anonymous]

Hypermobile adult here. It is bad for her joints - maybe not yet, but eventually. However, it’s harmful if she’s hyperextending past her natural limits. But her limits are very different from yours and unless her joints are popping (subluxating) or she’s really pushing herself, it’s fine to go as far as her body is able to. Most importantly, she will need to learn to learn her limits so she doesn’t injure herself. She shouldn’t be popping joints even if it doesn’t hurt (yet). And shouldn’t push to the point of pain to get herself into a specific position.

[Anonymous]

Make sure she does some kind of strength focused training and focuses on active instead of passive flexibility. It’s unlikely she’ll listen if you try to tell her not to show off — there are lots of situations/activities where flexibility is seen as a big benefit and if she enjoys it she’ll be drawn to that kind of thing so the key is to let her explore flexibility training in a way that’s sustainable for her body. And PP is right that her limits are different than yours so I would be less guided by how “gross” something looks but rather by the way she’s training in general.

-somewhat hyper flexible adult who trains with many hyperflexible people due to my hobbies

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make sure she does some kind of strength focused training and focuses on active instead of passive flexibility. It’s unlikely she’ll listen if you try to tell her not to show off — there are lots of situations/activities where flexibility is seen as a big benefit and if she enjoys it she’ll be drawn to that kind of thing so the key is to let her explore flexibility training in a way that’s sustainable for her body. And PP is right that her limits are different than yours so I would be less guided by how “gross” something looks but rather by the way she’s training in general.

-somewhat hyper flexible adult who trains with many hyperflexible people due to my hobbies

Thanks - both of these responses are helpful. She is a very active kid - a dancer, she plays a team sport, horseback rider, etc. I never hear popping sounds, but I can talk to her about paying attention to how her body feels when she does different moves. It’s the latest move that is really getting to me - where she puts her chin to the ground and bends her body backwards until her feet go in front of her face. I start imagining slipped discs. I don’t tell her it’s gross - but I do ask her not to do it in random places. Can you imagine, I had to interrupt her— she started doing her routine in the shoe store. Quite a performer.

[Anonymous]

I have hypermobility in hips and fingers. Fingers are now showing pain from having them backwards so much.

Hopefully she’s not in dance competitions because they see that as a talent and she’ll have to do it all the time but it’s not dance. The chin thing is not even attractive and there’s no way to gracefully get into some of the positions. Ballet will keep her joints in better condition.

[Anonymous]

My hyper mobile child worked with a PT. She gave him a list of things to keep in mind so he doesn’t do damage that would be painful in later years. Things like not to hyper-extend when hanging from a bar and instead to keep a bend in the elbow. You may want to seek out a PT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure she does some kind of strength focused training and focuses on active instead of passive flexibility. It’s unlikely she’ll listen if you try to tell her not to show off — there are lots of situations/activities where flexibility is seen as a big benefit and if she enjoys it she’ll be drawn to that kind of thing so the key is to let her explore flexibility training in a way that’s sustainable for her body. And PP is right that her limits are different than yours so I would be less guided by how “gross” something looks but rather by the way she’s training in general.

-somewhat hyper flexible adult who trains with many hyperflexible people due to my hobbies

Thanks - both of these responses are helpful. She is a very active kid - a dancer, she plays a team sport, horseback rider, etc. I never hear popping sounds, but I can talk to her about paying attention to how her body feels when she does different moves. It’s the latest move that is really getting to me - where she puts her chin to the ground and bends her body backwards until her feet go in front of her face. I start imagining slipped discs. I don’t tell her it’s gross - but I do ask her not to do it in random places. Can you imagine, I had to interrupt her— she started doing her routine in the shoe store. Quite a performer.

That makes sense and yeah unfortunately dance classes are likely to see her extreme flexibility as an asset. Have you spoken to her dance coaches about it, especially her dance teacher? Extreme flexibility often comes at the cost of joint stability so they should be really emphasizing strength and conditioning and control going in and out of those more dramatic moves. None of the things you’ve described are inherently dangerous but they should all be worked on with control so she doesn’t get a nasty surprise when she tries to do them at 30.

Also lol at practicing in public — she’s clearly a performer and I hope she has a great time. I’m of the category that thinks this stuff looks cool (I would love to work on headsits but my back is still recovering from pregnancy) but I get that it’s not for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Make sure it doesn’t become a party trick as she gets older and into high school.

[Anonymous]

What team sport does she do? I did all of the party tricks as a child, but ended up with multiple joint repair surgeries from overuse injuries once sports training got serious in high school. And I would absolutely not continue her in a dance studio that isn’t informed on physiology and her needs. Both because they’ll encourage dangerous practices, and because they SHOULD be teaching her how to take care of her joints.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What team sport does she do? I did all of the party tricks as a child, but ended up with multiple joint repair surgeries from overuse injuries once sports training got serious in high school. And I would absolutely not continue her in a dance studio that isn’t informed on physiology and her needs. Both because they’ll encourage dangerous practices, and because they SHOULD be teaching her how to take care of her joints.

She plays soccer, on a rec team (one of the more low key teams). Dancing is her new (full steam ahead) passion. I have her in a studio that does not do competitions. She wanted to compete, but I’ve steered her away from that. Her focus now is getting onto the studio’s dance team, followed by a poms team in middle school and high school. She is a laser focused kind of kid.

I’m very interested in getting some more education on how to care for her joints. She also has flat feet, which I’ve always assumed is related. I briefly took her to PT for the feet, but they let us go because she is living an active, healthy lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Hyper mobile adult. Agree with all the advice given. I wasn't allowed to do dance or gymnastics as my hypermobility was seen as an assett and used. I also wasn't supposed to show off my "tricks" but of course I did.

[Anonymous]

Ask your doc about Ehlers-Danlos

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ask your doc about Ehlers-Danlos

(OP) I met a woman who had this when my kids were tiny. The symptoms had brought her life to a screeching halt in mid life and she was in extreme pain. I hope my daughter doesn’t have Ehlers-Danlos. I’ve googled it before, but never asked the doctor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ask your doc about Ehlers-Danlos

(OP) I met a woman who had this when my kids were tiny. The symptoms had brought her life to a screeching halt in mid life and she was in extreme pain. I hope my daughter doesn’t have Ehlers-Danlos. I’ve googled it before, but never asked the doctor.

This is PP, my best friend, and I both have it. We happen to have a mild form, coincidentally, but I do have to get PT for my hips because of unintended extra use. I’ve been a yogi my whole life, and had to be very careful not to overdo it. But please don’t be afraid if this is the diagnosis as it can be managed. If you find out it is that it’s actually beneficial because you can have her monitored, and they can help her as she grows and develops.

[Anonymous]

^ just adding of course I hope this isn’t the case for your daughter but many people that I know with it or have read about in support groups who have the most issues are ones that never realized they had had it so they were doing all this crazy stuff that created wear and tear their whole life and so as they got older it was harder for them. The earlier you know the better you can take care of your body.