Typical views of in-laws?

[Anonymous]

Most of my friends don’t seem too enamored by their in-laws (myself included). Nothing is terribly wrong with mine, but seeing them is definitely more of a chore/obligation than something I can actually enjoy doing. And usually when their visit is over, I breathe sigh of relief.

I would say most of my friends feel this way. Do you all share this sentiment and if you were to guess, how common is it for people to actually LIKE their in laws?

[Anonymous]

I’d say it is like this:

-60% are “meh” about their in laws- relationship has had its ups and downs, no severe ongoing issues but don’t necessarily look forward to seeing ILs either

-20% love their in-laws, sometimes even more than their own side of the family. Look forward to seeing them, pretty close relationship.

-20% strongly dislike their ILs, severe ongoing problems

But I’ve been married for almost 20yrs and many of my friends/peers have also. So the above is more of a long-range view

[Anonymous]

I think it may depend on several factors. It seems like women that got married when they were younger generally have more issues with the in-laws than those who were older. But it also depends on the in-laws personalities.

I absolutely adore my in-laws and whenever we find ourselves anywhere near their house we always try to stop by for a visit. But they are wonderful, loving, supportive people and fun to be around.

[Anonymous]

I like my in-laws (FIL now deceased), because they never created any problems, and indeed, my MIL took my side in the rare times that DH had mild complaints about me. They always welcomed me with open arms.

We are not from the same culture or language, and do not have much in common, but we have always respected each other.


My mother, on the other hand. Sigh. It's been difficult.

[Anonymous]

I love my in-laws! I know they don’t agree with me on all facets of parenting but they are very kind, loving and generous.

[Anonymous]

Im in the meh category as are most people i know. I dont dislike them but dont go out of my way to be around of them. Same goes for my sibling in laws so its not a generational thing.

A few of my frienda have actual animosity. Im wracking my brain to think of anyone who likes their inlaws better... can only think of one friend whose parents are both deceased so not really a fair comparison.

[Anonymous]

I love my in laws very much. They helped me raise my children. I will always be so grateful for them. It's hard watching them slip away from themselves with dementia. I will miss them terribly when they go.

[Anonymous]

Mine are really nice people and I value having them around to support and love my kids.

[Anonymous]

I like my ILs. Am from a very dysfunctional family, so through them, I appreciate my kids have learned what a healthy, supportive family looks like. There would be a big gap in the kids’ emotional development without my ILs because I am learning from them too.

[Anonymous]

Yes I dread my in laws. Dread. And am sad that my kids wives will feel this way about me too.

[Anonymous]

I’m in the meh camp but it’s largely a me issue as they really haven’t done anything major to deserve my ambivalence. My DH and kids love them tons and I would never do anything to undermine that so we see them a lot.

[Anonymous]

I like my in laws a lot. They are quirky, smart, loving, would support us no matter what. I don’t think many people in my circle have anything but love for their in laws. We are a pretty harmonious group with healthy family relationships.

[Anonymous]

I loved my in laws for a long time. They were great to me as long as we did exactly what they said. When the kids got older and we had to make adjustments, they turned on us. Now I can’t stand them.

[Anonymous]

My FIL is kinda crazy and believes in all this fringe stuff thats way past Newsmax and OAN. I guess my biggest complaint about him is that he doesn't seem to think about things he feels so strongly about because if he did just a little bit of research he wouldnt just blindly believe this stuff. He's OK outside of that but this stuff is almost all he talks about now, it's kinda sad in a a way because DW says he wasn't this way growing up.

[Anonymous]

Yes share the same sentiment.