Making religious comments without thinking

[Anonymous]

Even though we live in a secular democracy, our world is more prone to religious thinking than it is to secular thinking. In real-life small talk and in comments on message boards like this one, people often put things in a religious context, sometimes without realizing or intending it. For people who want to be more sensitive about this when in a non-religious setting, here are some comments to avoid:

- “What church do you go to?”

- “I’ll pray for you.”

And a recent response on this forum to a former Southern Baptist who became an atheist:

- “This is why crap religions piss me off. You shouldn’t be denied a relationship with the eternal energy.”

(pp either doesn’t know or doesn’t care that atheists don’t believe in an eternal energy and thus don’t think in terms of being denied it.)

- “God bless you.”

(Even atheists will say “God bless you” after someone sneezes. It’s automatic! They don’t realize they’ve said it until it’s out. It’s not meant religiously even among religious people. It’s just our way of acknowledging a sneeze. Maybe we could get used to the European focus on health -- “Salud” or “Gesundheit.”)

Any other examples or ideas on how to handle it? Hope to hear from both religious and non-religious people.

[Anonymous]

If someone sneezes around me, I reflexively grab my mask and sprint to a distance of 6 feet.

BTW, 3/10 for trolling.

[Anonymous]

Don’t read too much into everything.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind if someone says "I'll pray for you" or "God bless you." I just nod and smile and sometimes even say thank you. They're harmless.

And if someone asks what church I go to, I just say "oh, I'm not religious." That pretty much ends it. Most people these days don't have the time or interest in having long theological conversations anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone sneezes around me, I reflexively grab my mask and sprint to a distance of 6 feet.

BTW, 3/10 for trolling.

please don't start with this again. Be a more magnanimous person

[Anonymous]

Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

[Anonymous]

I found myself questioning "Like a kid on Christmas day." recently.

[Anonymous]

As a member of a religious minority, being asked what church I go to makes me very uncomfortable because there's a decent chance that a truthful answer will be met with prejudice and hostility.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

Christians may carry guilt and shame, but they also have hope for eternal life and seeing their loved ones again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

Christians may carry guilt and shame, but they also have hope for eternal life and seeing their loved ones again.

Yes but that's part of the problem, christians believe those things are part of and exclusive to their christianity. Hearing their elitism at funerals is really something.

Listening to the racket about how overjoyed they are that their "loved one" died is another glad I'm not religious moment.

Having a soul is not some novel christian concept yet they seem to believe it is and work it into conversations often, but with all these religious twists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

Christians may carry guilt and shame, but they also have hope for eternal life and seeing their loved ones again.

Yes but that's part of the problem, christians believe those things are part of and exclusive to their christianity. Hearing their elitism at funerals is really something.

Listening to the racket about how overjoyed they are that their "loved one" died is another glad I'm not religious moment.

Having a soul is not some novel christian concept yet they seem to believe it is and work it into conversations often, but with all these religious twists.

Is there a way to convey to them that you don't believe what they do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

Christians may carry guilt and shame, but they also have hope for eternal life and seeing their loved ones again.

Yes but that's part of the problem, christians believe those things are part of and exclusive to their christianity. Hearing their elitism at funerals is really something.

Listening to the racket about how overjoyed they are that their "loved one" died is another glad I'm not religious moment.

Having a soul is not some novel christian concept yet they seem to believe it is and work it into conversations often, but with all these religious twists.

Is there a way to convey to them that you don't believe what they do?

DP. But there's no need to do this. Esp.not at a funeral. Let them believe what they want if it gives them comfort. I don't have a problem with that, as long as they don't expect me to believe it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Saying "I'm not religious" also works well for me & easily shuts down any religious geared conversations.

I just say bless you. If someone wants to pray for me I equate it to sending good thoughts or well wishes, though thinking of you is so much more appropriate imo.

I do much prefer my atheist friends to my christian friends -- the older I get, the more my christian friends feel completely unrelatable. I just find religion so sad, and that it's hard to know the user really truly believes it all and carries so much guilt and shame, which having grown up religious, I've found to be highly damaging emotions to have fostered. It's also hard for me to see how religious parents force it onto their children.

Christians may carry guilt and shame, but they also have hope for eternal life and seeing their loved ones again.

Yes but that's part of the problem, christians believe those things are part of and exclusive to their christianity. Hearing their elitism at funerals is really something.

Listening to the racket about how overjoyed they are that their "loved one" died is another glad I'm not religious moment.

Having a soul is not some novel christian concept yet they seem to believe it is and work it into conversations often, but with all these religious twists.

Is there a way to convey to them that you don't believe what they do?

DP. But there's no need to do this. Esp.not at a funeral. Let them believe what they want if it gives them comfort. I don't have a problem with that, as long as they don't expect me to believe it.

Their funerals their business yes... though I still don't think its healthy for society in general to use their superiority the way its used. It's that they project that same view at the funerals of non-followers, like believing someone who died by suicide, or enacted MAID is going to hell.

[Anonymous]

I will say I think OP is kind of trolling but I was at a bar the other night and was talking to a guy casually and kind of jokingly told him to give me his elevator pitch of who he was as a person and he kicked it off with 'I am a God fearing Christian' or something like that and I have to admit it took effort to keep the surprise off my face.

Of course there's nothing wrong with that, but it seemed like a very intense way to talk to a girl at a bar who was wearing black lipstick haha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will say I think OP is kind of trolling but I was at a bar the other night and was talking to a guy casually and kind of jokingly told him to give me his elevator pitch of who he was as a person and he kicked it off with 'I am a God fearing Christian' or something like that and I have to admit it took effort to keep the surprise off my face.

Of course there's nothing wrong with that, but it seemed like a very intense way to talk to a girl at a bar who was wearing black lipstick haha.

^ so did you guys hook up?