Are there any downsides to marrying into a rich family?

[Anonymous]

Can you think of any? I mean $25M+ NW

[Anonymous]

God yes. They:ll expect to control everything and force you into their cultural norms.

[Anonymous]

Totally depends on the family. Are they country club types and will expect you to dress/act a certain way at get togethers, play golf with their wealthy friends etc? Go to lots of galas and fundraisers? Sometimes money comes with strings. If they are concerned about their legacy and how they appear to others, that isn’t ideal no matter how much money they have. But if your spouse is willing to stand up for you, and you can afford a decent life without relying on family money, then I can be fine! One of my good friends comes from this level of wealth and she is super down to earth, no designer anything, no country clubs etc. I had no idea until I learned she flies private and her parents live in a 15M house…

[Anonymous]

It entirely depends on the family. Expect a prenup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It entirely depends on the family. Expect a prenup.

Child support trumps prenups. If you think there will be a divorce, do it when the kids are young

[Anonymous]

It depends on how secure yet adaptable you are, how much grounded your spouse is and how nonchalant both families are.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't mind marrying someone two three times more well off than me and mine but 10 times is a gamble.

[Anonymous]

I married into a wealthy family worth about $20M. It's been wonderful in nearly every way and I am so grateful to be in this position. In-laws gave generously over the years until they passed away and we inherited 1/4 of their estate. In life, they funded private school, 529 accounts and hosted us on family vacations. I hope to pay it forward to my kids. They were lavish in some ways - pricey real estate, but practical in others - never flew private, but did fly First. I appreciated that they were not heavy-handed with advice or expectations. Never felt any strings attached to their monetary gifts.

[Anonymous]

My sister married into a 20 mil net worth family. They are the most down the earth, kind, normal, stable people ever. You’d never think they are rich based on how they present themselves and their modest lifestyle. The FIL worked hard in his youth to accumulate the wealth and they lived a relatively modest lifestyle to their income.

She is incredibly happy and there are 0 strings. They adore her and feel happy to have her!

[Anonymous]

They call the shots.

[Anonymous]

If you can March to their tune you’ll have a nice life.

[Anonymous]

Honestly 25M isn’t that much for the big cities. They may have multiple houses and fly first class, maybe charter jets, but they don’t own a plane and a yacht. (I know people who do). Also, Depending on trusts, kids will still need to get jobs, it’s not enough generational wealth to live off of indefinitely.

[Anonymous]

There shouldn't be any if you use the same judgement you would use when marrying into an average family.

The problem is when women lower their standards for acceptable behavior when they are dating a guy with a rich family vs. an a guy with an average income family. If your fiance's rich family is overbearing, you will notice before you got married. If you would stay with him under those circumstances if he was average, you are lucky that he is rich!

I am pretty confident that my DH's family will be the same even if they were rich.

[Anonymous]

There are. Read Pineapple Street for one take.

[Anonymous]

Don’t expect to be able to build joint wealth. The house you live in with your spouse will be owned by the family trust. If you divorce, you may end up being the one paying CS and/or alimony.