Question for People that don't have affairs, do you regret it.

[Anonymous]

If you were in a low love/sexless marriage and you stayed faithful, do you regret it?

[Anonymous]

I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

[Anonymous]

I don't regret it so far because I am proud that I'm a person with integrity and live according to my morals. I have fleeting thoughts of asking my DH for a hall pass because he cheated during a really rocky time in our marriage. But honestly, I feel really good about myself during that time. Stuff was REALLY hard and I leaned into my marriage and vows and am proud of the wife and partner that I was/am.

I also think if we do every divorce and I find myself in a new relationship, I have no baggage of my own to disclose. I was a good partner. He would have to tell future partners that when the going got tough he was a disrespectful coward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

Midlife sexual orientation change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't regret it so far because I am proud that I'm a person with integrity and live according to my morals. I have fleeting thoughts of asking my DH for a hall pass because he cheated during a really rocky time in our marriage. But honestly, I feel really good about myself during that time. Stuff was REALLY hard and I leaned into my marriage and vows and am proud of the wife and partner that I was/am.

I also think if we do every divorce and I find myself in a new relationship, I have no baggage of my own to disclose. I was a good partner. He would have to tell future partners that when the going got tough he was a disrespectful coward.

I doubt he will say that about himself even if it is totally accurate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

Midlife sexual orientation change.

Same. My ex came out as gay midlife. I regret not holding higher standards in the beginning of the marriage and maybe leaving earlier. No I don't regret doing bad behavior like cheating. It's not something I would consider. I do regret waiting this long to get out of the marriage or finding a way to live with him longer for the kids just to extract more money and help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

Midlife sexual orientation change.

Hmm, but is she then having sex with women now?

[Anonymous]

I am in a tough spot with this. Have HS age kids and my spouse has asked that we stay married until they are off to college. We are basically sexless and I can't stay in a relationship with no connection and intimacy.

Seems there is a path to divorce while still living under the same roof.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

Midlife sexual orientation change.

Hmm, but is she then having sex with women now?

Yes, she has a girlfriend. I love her and my family and personally don't want to have sex with someone else, so I sacrifice sex to keep my family, but I don't force that on her. I'm happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man in a sexless marriage with a lot of love, and no. My spouse has given me permission to have sex with someone else, but I don't. Involving myself with another person without disrupting my family life is going to be a lot of work, on a practical front, and it's a violation of the vow I took before God, so I don't do it.

Why would your wife just not be intimate with you? Medical situation or just the kitchen is closed?

Midlife sexual orientation change.

Hmm, but is she then having sex with women now?

Yes, she has a girlfriend. I love her and my family and personally don't want to have sex with someone else, so I sacrifice sex to keep my family, but I don't force that on her. I'm happy.

Wow. If my DH had a midlife sexual orientation change and we remained married I'd be seeing other men. The stability of home + the fun of dating. Sounds win win to me.

[Anonymous]

I have never cheated on anyone. I don't regret it.

It would be hard for me to cheat. I see myself as extremely loyal, and anyone who would be trying to cheat with me would have to see me very differently from how I see myself. It would be impossible for me to be attracted to someone who does not see me the way I see myself. I couldn't do a one night stand either.

I am too full of myself to cheat or to regret not cheating.😉

[Anonymous]

If I were to cheat, and my spouse were to find out, our marriage would likely be over. My kids would be devastated, their whole world would be turned upside down, as would mine. As tbh would my financial situation (DH and I make approx the same salary, so its not like Im dependent upon his salary to live some extravagant lifestyle, but we have a nice dual-income life). I dont hate my husband, he is a perfectly fine partner/father and a good friend. Blowing it all up isnt worth it to me, sexless marriage or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I have never cheated on anyone. I don't regret it.

It would be hard for me to cheat. I see myself as extremely loyal, and anyone who would be trying to cheat with me would have to see me very differently from how I see myself. It would be impossible for me to be attracted to someone who does not see me the way I see myself. I couldn't do a one night stand either.

I am too full of myself to cheat or to regret not cheating.😉

+1 I don’t have the cheating gene

I’m a very honest/loyal person. And let me tell you—over the years (single and married)—I was given a lot of opportunity and propositions.

Just made me think very lowly of the person trying…scummy

[Anonymous]

I’ve never come close to physically cheating but I did have a really intense friendship that was pretty close to all consuming. If sex were added to that relationship I am pretty sure I’d be typing this from an efficiency apartment.