Disclosing atheism

[Anonymous]

My family invited another family over for dinner who had just moved into the house next door and invited a few other families from the friends the neighborhood to welcome them and introduce them to folks. At one point, a member of the new family was talking with me about how much they are going to miss their old church and I was empathizing how hard it can be to leave a community and make a new one in your new home when they asked me about my faith, where I go to church etc. I breezily said, oh, I'm an atheist, and tried to keep the conversation moving but they seemed taken aback - as if I had said something really impolite. What say you, DCUM? Is it impolite, "too much", "aggressive", or what have you to identify as an atheist if pressed? My spouse thinks I should have said that I'm "not particularly religious" to avoid offending our new neighbors.

[Anonymous]

You did fine. It is what it is.

[Anonymous]

How would you feel if they had that reaction if you had said "We're Jewish"?

Or "We're Muslim"

Or "We're Buddhists".

You'd have thought your new neighbors were inconsiderate prejudiced jerks.

Guess what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How would you feel if they had that reaction if you had said "We're Jewish"?

Or "We're Muslim"

Or "We're Buddhists".

You'd have thought your new neighbors were inconsiderate prejudiced jerks.

Guess what?

I don't think the neighbors are jerks for reacting as they did -- they were just shocked - I think because they expected you to just follow their lead - because that's usually what happens.

Your wife is right that it would have been easier all around to just say you're not particularly religious, but I'm glad you were forthright about your atheism. I'd like to see that happen more frequently, so eventually people wouldn't be shocked at the response. They might also not talk about religion as if it's something that everyone has.

Sort of like the way a lot of society reacts to gays these days. It didn't always used to be that way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How would you feel if they had that reaction if you had said "We're Jewish"?

Or "We're Muslim"

Or "We're Buddhists".

You'd have thought your new neighbors were inconsiderate prejudiced jerks.

Guess what?

I don't think the neighbors are jerks for reacting as they did -- they were just shocked - I think because they expected you to just follow their lead - because that's usually what happens.

Your wife is right that it would have been easier all around to just say you're not particularly religious, but I'm glad you were forthright about your atheism. I'd like to see that happen more frequently, so eventually people wouldn't be shocked at the response. They might also not talk about religion as if it's something that everyone has.

Sort of like the way a lot of society reacts to gays these days. It didn't always used to be that way.

Once again, all belief systems are OK to express, but not your atheism! You keep that stuff to yourself!

Shameful.

[Anonymous]

I just say I’m not religious

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How would you feel if they had that reaction if you had said "We're Jewish"?

Or "We're Muslim"

Or "We're Buddhists".

You'd have thought your new neighbors were inconsiderate prejudiced jerks.

Guess what?

I don't think the neighbors are jerks for reacting as they did -- they were just shocked - I think because they expected you to just follow their lead - because that's usually what happens.

Your wife is right that it would have been easier all around to just say you're not particularly religious, but I'm glad you were forthright about your atheism. I'd like to see that happen more frequently, so eventually people wouldn't be shocked at the response. They might also not talk about religion as if it's something that everyone has.

Sort of like the way a lot of society reacts to gays these days. It didn't always used to be that way.

Once again, all belief systems are OK to express, but not your atheism! You keep that stuff to yourself!

Shameful.

It's changing and people like OP are helping it along

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

which is... atheism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

True, but it's the easy way out -- sort of like a gay guy saying he's not the marrying kind (in the old days -- now people bring up their same sex spouse like it's no big deal.)

And it does nothing to help change the perception of atheists as nasty, bad people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

True, but it's the easy way out -- sort of like a gay guy saying he's not the marrying kind (in the old days -- now people bring up their same sex spouse like it's no big deal.)

And it does nothing to help change the perception of atheists as nasty, bad people.

You know what would help with that? If hundreds of DCUM readers didn't click into the Religion forum every day to see atheists trashing faith and showing bigotry towards certain faiths. I mean, if you want to change the perception of atheists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

True, but it's the easy way out -- sort of like a gay guy saying he's not the marrying kind (in the old days -- now people bring up their same sex spouse like it's no big deal.)

And it does nothing to help change the perception of atheists as nasty, bad people.

You know what would help with that? If hundreds of DCUM readers didn't click into the Religion forum every day to see atheists trashing faith and showing bigotry towards certain faiths. I mean, if you want to change the perception of atheists.

Such irony.

“We wouldn’t hate the atheists so much if they would just keep it to themselves and not state their beliefs “

[Anonymous]

I would only tell people I am an atheist if they directly asked me, as they did the OP, what church I go to or if I was a Christian or whatever. Otherwise I assume that, like me, they don't really want to get into a discussion of religious faith, especially with people who have views that are completely opposite of mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

True, but it's the easy way out -- sort of like a gay guy saying he's not the marrying kind (in the old days -- now people bring up their same sex spouse like it's no big deal.)

And it does nothing to help change the perception of atheists as nasty, bad people.

You know what would help with that? If hundreds of DCUM readers didn't click into the Religion forum every day to see atheists trashing faith and showing bigotry towards certain faiths. I mean, if you want to change the perception of atheists.

Such irony.

“We wouldn’t hate the atheists so much if they would just keep it to themselves and not state their beliefs “

That's not what was said. Don't be hateful is the point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How would you feel if they had that reaction if you had said "We're Jewish"?

Or "We're Muslim"

Or "We're Buddhists".

You'd have thought your new neighbors were inconsiderate prejudiced jerks.

Guess what?

I don't think the neighbors are jerks for reacting as they did -- they were just shocked - I think because they expected you to just follow their lead - because that's usually what happens.

Your wife is right that it would have been easier all around to just say you're not particularly religious, but I'm glad you were forthright about your atheism. I'd like to see that happen more frequently, so eventually people wouldn't be shocked at the response. They might also not talk about religion as if it's something that everyone has.

Sort of like the way a lot of society reacts to gays these days. It didn't always used to be that way.

Once again, all belief systems are OK to express, but not your atheism! You keep that stuff to yourself!

Shameful.

That's not what pp said. Get a grip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just say I’m not religious

True, but it's the easy way out -- sort of like a gay guy saying he's not the marrying kind (in the old days -- now people bring up their same sex spouse like it's no big deal.)

And it does nothing to help change the perception of atheists as nasty, bad people.

You know what would help with that? If hundreds of DCUM readers didn't click into the Religion forum every day to see atheists trashing faith and showing bigotry towards certain faiths. I mean, if you want to change the perception of atheists.

Such irony.

“We wouldn’t hate the atheists so much if they would just keep it to themselves and not state their beliefs “

That's not what was said. Don't be hateful is the point.

Oh yes that is EXACTLY what was said. "atheists trashing faith and showing bigotry towards certain faiths".

What you think is "trashing faith" is an atheist expressing what they think. You maligning it as "trashing" and then claiming it justifies prejudice "You know what would help with that?" as if it justifies it somehow.

You even did it with this very post.