| I know this sounds stupid but it’s depressing to think that I could have married someone making my salary and we’d have a 700k HHI. On 350k there are so many nice houses out of reach that would be affordable on two of my incomes. |
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😭😭😭
How terrible for you! Grow up. |
| what do you do? |
How old are you? It may not be too late to divorce the dead-weight and start over! |
Think about what your partner is probably saying about you
I wish I had married someone making 700k+. There are so many nice houses we could afford... Thanks for letting us know what you make even though no one asked. These types of questions don't help anyone and also show a not-so-subtle disregard for the value of household labor. |
| Yes, no ifs and buts.. if you don't like your situation then what are you doing about it? Are you actively trying to earn 700K or trying to find a different spouse or perhaps meditation and life coaching? |
| You could always end up the sole breadwinner supporting 2 households with alimony/child support... |
| Maybe you could’ve and maybe you couldn’t have. There aren’t that many people making upwards of $350K let alone finding one of the required gender who you’d want to marry. It severely narrows the pool. Now if they don’t work at all, then of course anything would be an improvement over zero. Even $150K a year would be a help though not world changing as a second income after taxes. Besides the odds that both of you would have gotten to your salary in the same time frame are slim, it takes backup for one person to get there and you would have had to pay a ton and outsourced everything for two people to get there. What you really needed was someone with generational $ who worked AND was willing to spend their family money on your joint life which is pretty uncommon. |
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This was us double biglaw. It was an effing grind. And with no default parent or primary breadwinner/primary house manager division, everything was just a constant shtshow. Constantly taking care of things late or not at all, late fees, stress.
Hopefully your spouse is taking other stress off your plate. |
| Yes but then $175k of that $350k would go to taxes and another $75-$100k for childcare. A lot of the rest would be eaten up by other outsourcing and buying more clothes, dry cleaning and communing costs. Your lifestyle wouldn’t be much better, and you’d just have two stressed out overworked parents. |
75-100k for childcare?! When we did this we had an au pair and part time preschool. It was way less than that even counting pre-tax. |
| My DH and I make about that combined, busting our asses. Be grateful, OP. |
NP but this is unfortunately easily doable if you opt for expensive but not outrageous options. our last year for 4 and 1 yo: 65k+ nanny salary and nanny taxes. 16K morning pre-K for older DC during school year, 4K morning summer camp for older DC. |
| If you made $700k combined, you would think you are rich and have to send your kids to private school, and if you have three that entire after tax second salary would be going to private school. |
| Well you should have been more successful like other people and you'd have over 700K on just one income. |