Do room parents get preferential treatment?

[Anonymous]

My DD’s teacher always “randomly” selects the parent chaperones for field trips (you’re supposed to email her and she’s supposed to get back to you or you hear nothing, which has been my experience) and the same people — all room parents — are selected every single time. I’ve tried to volunteer to chaperone a few times this year and each time I’m told they have enough and then I find out it’s the same people. Why wouldn’t this teacher give every parent an equal shot at volunteering? Not everyone can be a room parent. I do try to volunteer for one-off things throughout the year though, which is what my schedule allows. These same room parents are always the ones huddled around the teacher every morning at drop-off as well. I’ve never had any desire to be friends with my kid’s teacher. But I guess this is a thing here?

[Anonymous]

Sometimes room parents get first dibs on field trip chaperoning. If you don't like that - be a room parent.

[Anonymous]

Wait, there are people who WANT to chaperone?

[Anonymous]

That is absolutely not OK, OP. You need to speak to the teacher. Don't worry about coming across as rude. There is clearly favoritism going on, and the teacher needs to recognize the favoritism is not invisible, but it's noted and commented upon.

And to PP, in my years of experience with two kids who are now in 7th and 12th grade, room parents never got first dibs for other roles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait, there are people who WANT to chaperone?

Oh for sure. Our school regularly turns people away because they have too many volunteers.

[Anonymous]

I am a room parent and we have a similar lottery for field trips. However, I am always give. First right of refusal since I spend a lot of time volunteering with the class, know all the kids, and the teachers know me. If a teacher is going to put a parent in charge of a group of elementary schoolers you bet they are going to lean on the ones they know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a room parent and we have a similar lottery for field trips. However, I am always give. First right of refusal since I spend a lot of time volunteering with the class, know all the kids, and the teachers know me. If a teacher is going to put a parent in charge of a group of elementary schoolers you bet they are going to lean on the ones they know.

That does not make sense at all. Such a system puts most volunteering opportunities in the hands of people who already have the opportunities. Any parent who goes through the volunteer training should have an equal chance. Handling a group of elementary schooler is not hard!

[Anonymous]

Teachers are professional. Professionals do not show favoritism. Teachers should not be casual, friends, with parents. Too much hanging-out at the school by the Room Mom is a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait, there are people who WANT to chaperone?

Oh for sure. Our school regularly turns people away because they have too many volunteers.

Ditto. But in our case, the room parent holds themselves in reserve and only chaperones if there is a last minute cancellation by one of the other parents (due to illness or something)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a room parent and we have a similar lottery for field trips. However, I am always give. First right of refusal since I spend a lot of time volunteering with the class, know all the kids, and the teachers know me. If a teacher is going to put a parent in charge of a group of elementary schoolers you bet they are going to lean on the ones they know.

That does not make sense at all. Such a system puts most volunteering opportunities in the hands of people who already have the opportunities. Any parent who goes through the volunteer training should have an equal chance. Handling a group of elementary schooler is not hard!

I’m not the PP you’re quoting. Our school is begging for volunteers. I guess at some point they added first dips on field trips to sweeten the ask for room parent. I eventually did it because no one else volunteered.

[Anonymous]

Wow- not normal, IME. I was room parent a few times and there was no preferential treatment. Usually the teacher sent out a signup genius and it was first come, first serve (for the first trip) and for any additional, parents who had NOT chaperoned yet got first dibs.

For parties, it was also signup genius for helpers- but any parent was always welcome to join and that was clearly stated.

This only seemed to be an issue in the very young grades. Usually by later elementary it was hard to find volunteers.

[Anonymous]

At our school the field trips are organized by the parents. The parents who do the work to set up the trip often end up chaperoning as well. I can't imagine being petty enough to feel slighted by that.

[Anonymous]

Yes, they also get to more or less pick the teacher for the following year too. It’s the only reason I volunteered.

[Anonymous]

I think this is normal and I don't have a problem with it. I'd like to chaperone if they have space, but the room parents do extra stuff and should get to be first in line for this kind of thing.
- Not a room parent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a room parent and we have a similar lottery for field trips. However, I am always give. First right of refusal since I spend a lot of time volunteering with the class, know all the kids, and the teachers know me. If a teacher is going to put a parent in charge of a group of elementary schoolers you bet they are going to lean on the ones they know.

This doesn't make sense. Since you're always around, they should allow other parents to chaperone before going to you. Lots of parents really do want to participate when they can. You should back out of all of the extra volunteer opportunities to give other parents a chance.