To ask if you agree with this about my daughter?

[Anonymous]

She is 37.
In school, she was popular but quiet and sensitive. An average student but very good at reading and spelling.
Never had a problem making friends and always had someone back to the house.
When she reached college age though, things changed. Struggled a lot with the new environment and was described as terribly shy. Managed to pass the course but only just. As the years have gone on, she's never been in a relationship or dated. Never moved out of home and now has no friends.
She has 2 chronic health issues, rheumatoid arthritis and ulcerative colitis, looks years younger than her age and speaks with an odd accent. She is obsessed with our pet dog and speaks about him constantly.
She works at a daycare but only as temp staff as she struggles with the long days. She is loved by the staff and kids but because she looks so young she feels they only like her because they think she is is a kid.
She gets embarrassed very easily, struggles a lot with chatting socially and has no social life outside of hanging out with her 3 older sisters.
I can't help but feel she may be autistic? However, She understands social cues very easily, very kind and empathetic towards others and has a great imagination (she writes too).
Just wondered what everyone thinks. Do want to add that she is great around the house, not one of those layabout adult kids because I know that's what everyone will assume.

[Anonymous]

Ask her what's going on. She is a grown woman now. Treat her like an adult and act like an adult yourself. Have a conversation with her.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she's suffered sexual abuse. I'd look into that.

[Anonymous]

Because she has had no relationships?

[Anonymous]

Sounds like anxiety to me, but my opinion is worth exactly what you paid for it.

Is she happy? Is she looking for your help to change her life? Do you not want her at home?

[Anonymous]

Therapy, exercise, join some type of volunteer group or community college class to gain skills, get out of working in childcare it’s very isolating.

[Anonymous]

She finds exercise difficult as she has RA but she walks everywhere every day.
Agree she needs to expand her social circle by joining a group.
She's worked in childcare for years and all her qualifications are in that area so not sure what else she could do. Especially as confidence and anxiety are such an issue.

[Anonymous]

She is 37 and has never moved out of the house and you don’t know what is wrong with her?! What?!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She finds exercise difficult as she has RA but she walks everywhere every day.
Agree she needs to expand her social circle by joining a group.
She's worked in childcare for years and all her qualifications are in that area so not sure what else she could do. Especially as confidence and anxiety are such an issue.

You’re just coming around to ask about this when she’s 37 and has been living at home for over 15 years. What’s going on with you that you haven’t dealt with this directly with her?

[Anonymous]

I would work with a nutritionist to see if it helps her health issues, I’ve seen people make remarkable progress on whole 30 diets for inflammation issues.. That can be socially isolating. And a psychiatrist to check for social anxiety and possible medications if that’s keeping her from achieving some goals she’d like to acheive in her life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is 37.
In school, she was popular but quiet and sensitive. An average student but very good at reading and spelling.
Never had a problem making friends and always had someone back to the house.
When she reached college age though, things changed. Struggled a lot with the new environment and was described as terribly shy. Managed to pass the course but only just. As the years have gone on, she's never been in a relationship or dated. Never moved out of home and now has no friends.
She has 2 chronic health issues, rheumatoid arthritis and ulcerative colitis, looks years younger than her age and speaks with an odd accent. She is obsessed with our pet dog and speaks about him constantly.
She works at a daycare but only as temp staff as she struggles with the long days. She is loved by the staff and kids but because she looks so young she feels they only like her because they think she is is a kid.
She gets embarrassed very easily, struggles a lot with chatting socially and has no social life outside of hanging out with her 3 older sisters.
I can't help but feel she may be autistic? However, She understands social cues very easily, very kind and empathetic towards others and has a great imagination (she writes too).
Just wondered what everyone thinks. Do want to add that she is great around the house, not one of those layabout adult kids because I know that's what everyone will assume.

She could be autistic. My DD was diagnosed as a teen and has an amazing imagination. It could also be social anxiety. But either way she needs help to live her most fulfilling life. I recommend Social Grace in Arlington for coaching. She really needs to start putting herself out there. https://socialgracellc.com/about

[Anonymous]

I'm just asking if it sounds like autism as I am really starting to think so. I do feel something more is going on than just anxiety but then other aspects just don't fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just asking if it sounds like autism as I am really starting to think so. I do feel something more is going on than just anxiety but then other aspects just don't fit.

Concerned about you as well.

[Anonymous]

I may be completely off-base, but I thought the whole move toward calling it a spectrum disorder was to emphasis that it is a spectrum, i.e., we are all on it somewhere. You may want to pick up the book Nobody's Normal for some perspective (although probably no answers).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just asking if it sounds like autism as I am really starting to think so. I do feel something more is going on than just anxiety but then other aspects just don't fit.

okay, if you want a diagnosis, have her take a neuropsych exam. That’s the only way to truly know. I’m the previous poster with an autistic daughter. No one can diagnose her over a message board nor can you by googling it. I’d like to reiterate, at the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter. She should be working with a therapist and/or social coach.