student loan debt

[Anonymous]

I am a dad that makes a point of staying out of my kids' personal and private lives.

My 25 years old son told me that he is getting serious with his 24 years old GF and that they are discussing marriage; however, his GF will finish her master degree in education in a few months with a 220K in student loan debt. My son did not have any student loan debt because he was fortunate enough to get a full scholarship + room/board at UVA (his gf is also attending UVA). He also just finished his Master degree in CS at GMU without any debt. While the student loan debt is a big concern for him, it is not a deal breaker. He asked me what I would do and I told him that while money isn't everything, it is going to take both of you a long time to pay that off. Are you going to be OK with that? WWYD?

[Anonymous]

How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

I don't see in the OP where it says she is an in-state student, or where if she also went to undergrad or elsewhere. But any out of state public will be very expensive with little aid. Probably private loans, my parents co-signed those for me and my sister too. Stupid but I was 18 with little financial literacy, which is pretty common unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Any plan to pay off the debt ?

Current or expected earnings of your son & his GF ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

I don't see in the OP where it says she is an in-state student, or where if she also went to undergrad or elsewhere. But any out of state public will be very expensive with little aid. Probably private loans, my parents co-signed those for me and my sister too. Stupid but I was 18 with little financial literacy, which is pretty common unfortunately.

OP here. She attends UVA as an OOS student and her parents co-signed the loans. My son has a 230K salary job with Apple. His GF will probably work for FCPS with a salary of around 55K. They would like to pay off the loan as soon as possible. I threw out one of the scenarios where I told my son that they are welcome to stay with my wife and I after they get married so that they can pay off the student loan in less than two years.

[Anonymous]

If not a troll, sharing that she should look into and plan for PSLF (student loan forgiveness for public school teachers after 10 years)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

I don't see in the OP where it says she is an in-state student, or where if she also went to undergrad or elsewhere. But any out of state public will be very expensive with little aid. Probably private loans, my parents co-signed those for me and my sister too. Stupid but I was 18 with little financial literacy, which is pretty common unfortunately.

OP here. She attends UVA as an OOS student and her parents co-signed the loans. My son has a 230K salary job with Apple. His GF will probably work for FCPS with a salary of around 55K. They would like to pay off the loan as soon as possible. I threw out one of the scenarios where I told my son that they are welcome to stay with my wife and I after they get married so that they can pay off the student loan in less than two years.

So they are going to live on her salary and 10K of his and use the remainder to pay off her loan? I'm just trying to figure out how they pay off the 220K in two years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

Parent Plus loans. They’re in the parents name, though -NP

[Anonymous]

I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a dad that makes a point of staying out of my kids' personal and private lives.

My 25 years old son told me that he is getting serious with his 24 years old GF and that they are discussing marriage; however, his GF will finish her master degree in education in a few months with a 220K in student loan debt. My son did not have any student loan debt because he was fortunate enough to get a full scholarship + room/board at UVA (his gf is also attending UVA). He also just finished his Master degree in CS at GMU without any debt. While the student loan debt is a big concern for him, it is not a deal breaker. He asked me what I would do and I told him that while money isn't everything, it is going to take both of you a long time to pay that off. Are you going to be OK with that? WWYD?

By the time I met DH in grad school, I had paid off my U/G loans but was set to have 20K in grad loans (paid them off in about three years). In one of our early chats, we discussed finances and I explained that the inequity in higher ed finance forces people like me to defer full throttle savings for retirement. He had never really thought about it that way, thinking that folks with lower savings were simply profligate with their money.

[Anonymous]

I was the girlfriend that graduated with massive amounts of student loan debt. My inlaws never offered to house us, but were also never judgmental or saw me as a gold digger. 20 years later and our finances are ours together and aside from intentionally saving for our kids' college funds, the debt just slowed us down financially, but never changed our relationship.

I think the idea to live with you and pay the debt off quickly is an incredibly generous offer, assuming you have the space and relationship with her/them to allow it to be a positive experience. The first year or two of marriage is an adjustment, and living with your new parents and inlaws feels like a lot for a young couple.

[Anonymous]

I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was the girlfriend that graduated with massive amounts of student loan debt. My inlaws never offered to house us, but were also never judgmental or saw me as a gold digger. 20 years later and our finances are ours together and aside from intentionally saving for our kids' college funds, the debt just slowed us down financially, but never changed our relationship.

I think the idea to live with you and pay the debt off quickly is an incredibly generous offer, assuming you have the space and relationship with her/them to allow it to be a positive experience. The first year or two of marriage is an adjustment, and living with your new parents and inlaws feels like a lot for a young couple.

This is good advice.

I also think encouraging them to meet with a financial planner and both commit to some long-term financial goals with each other and a neutral third party is a good idea. 220K of debt is no joke and hopefully she is a wonderful person with a realistic view of finances going forward. But I think a little bit of feet to the fire might not be the worst idea to make sure they are on the same page financially. It's no secret that finances are one of the main causes of friction in a marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.

Eh, it happens. My sister ended up with a fair amount of debt for an education degree, although education was not her original major (niche field at an arts-heavy university). Kids get sucked into thinking a degree from a prestigious university will be worth the cost. Her now DH also had student debt and they did see a financial planner to map things out, the PP's suggestion is a good one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does she have 220k? The Staffod limit for undergrad is less than 30k. She's in state, so her masters should be two years at less than 20k a year. Even with accumulating interest, that isn't 220k

Parent Plus loans. They’re in the parents name, though -NP

OP did not say that these were all federal loans.

It's probably a combination of private & federal loans.