Sleepover etiquette

[Anonymous]

My child has gone to a few sleepovers at friends' houses, but I have yet to reciprocate because she shares a room, and having a sleepover would be conducive to chaos with my other child in the mix.
Is this something I should tell families? I do host playdates and other fun things, but just don't want to host sleepovers. I am afraid she'll stop getting invited if we don't reciprocate.

[Anonymous]

Honestly you're probably fine. A lot of parents are a lot more comfortable hosting than sending their child to the home of someone they don't know well. I'd just say something in passing next time you pick her up . . . "Oh, we wish we could host sleepovers but we don't have the space for it. Thank you so much for giving her the experience!"

[Anonymous]

My DD goes through stages of sleepovers every Friday/Saturday with different friends and her favorite cousin. In all these years (she's 13) we've hosted 95% of the time. I'm not looking for parity - and my DD goes to sleep away camp for a month so its not that she's afraid to be away from us. Her friends just like coming to our (modest!) house (no fancy tvs or great snacks to tempt anyone!!) I wouldn't worry OP!

[Anonymous]

Sleepovers are chaos anyway. You could host if you want to, just have the younger kid sleep in your room or somewhere else or have the older kids sleep somewhere else. During sleepovers at our house the kids usually like to sleep in the rec room in the basement with their sleeping bags and such anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sleepovers are chaos anyway. You could host if you want to, just have the younger kid sleep in your room or somewhere else or have the older kids sleep somewhere else. During sleepovers at our house the kids usually like to sleep in the rec room in the basement with their sleeping bags and such anyway.

+1

If you really wanted to host a sleepover, you could do some work around but the room sharing is a pretty good out for you.

[Anonymous]

let them sleep in the family room

[Anonymous]

We have the kids set up sleeping bags downstairs. Is something like that an option?

[Anonymous]

If you're hosting other things, I wouldn't think twice about it.

[Anonymous]

I host most of the sleepovers in my kids' friend group. The kids usually want to stay at our house and I have a high tolerance for chaos. I think it's fine if you want to express your appreciation but don't say that you can't host due to space and the sibling. This would come off as disingenuous to me give that kids can have fun sleepovers in small living rooms and other common areas and most families with multiple kids have to deal with the disruption of a sibling's sleep when friends stay over, whether or not they share a room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're hosting other things, I wouldn't think twice about it.

Agree.

Tbh I dread the sleepover invitations except with two very close friends whose kids I know actually go to sleep by ten or so. A sleepover in a new house with new friends often leads to too much excitement and not enough sleep and then a miserable few days.

[Anonymous]

Anyone ever have suggestions for handling sleepovers with kids who still have accidents at night?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone ever have suggestions for handling sleepovers with kids who still have accidents at night?

DS wore a pull up to his first few sleep overs, as did a few of the other kids. He had friends over a few weeks back who used pull ups, they are 10. Some kids are late to being able to sleep dry. It is not a big deal. The kids changed quietly in the bathroom and threw away the used pull ups. No one said anything. But part of that is the kids being ok staying at a kids home wearing pull ups.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone ever have suggestions for handling sleepovers with kids who still have accidents at night?

DS wore a pull up to his first few sleep overs, as did a few of the other kids. He had friends over a few weeks back who used pull ups, they are 10. Some kids are late to being able to sleep dry. It is not a big deal. The kids changed quietly in the bathroom and threw away the used pull ups. No one said anything. But part of that is the kids being ok staying at a kids home wearing pull ups.

Did the boys all know about the pull-ups? It seems like kids these days are a lot more accepting of that. My son has a friend who wears them and he isn’t at all shy about it.

[Anonymous]

My kids have their own room but prefer sleeping bags in the family room when friends come over. A shared room will be fine!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone ever have suggestions for handling sleepovers with kids who still have accidents at night?

DS wore a pull up to his first few sleep overs, as did a few of the other kids. He had friends over a few weeks back who used pull ups, they are 10. Some kids are late to being able to sleep dry. It is not a big deal. The kids changed quietly in the bathroom and threw away the used pull ups. No one said anything. But part of that is the kids being ok staying at a kids home wearing pull ups.

Did the boys all know about the pull-ups? It seems like kids these days are a lot more accepting of that. My son has a friend who wears them and he isn’t at all shy about it.

Yes, they threw them away in the bathroom. No one cared. I remember my child's first sleep over, he was 8, I was worried about the pull up situation. He was in no way dry every night, maybe half the time. I talked with the Mom to see how she felt about it and the Mom told me that 1) her kid was not always dry through the night and 2) several of the other parents has asked. It turned out that all of the kids still had nights were they had accidents.

DS is dry through the night now and we don't ask the parents and the parents don't tell us, we simply see the disposable underwear in the bathroom. No one cares. The kids change in private (bathroom or a closed bedroom) so no one sees them putting it on and they wear something over it. They take them off in private. It is not a big deal. DS is 10 now and has some friends who are 11.