Is is possible to ask for phone calls to be recorded?

[Anonymous]

Because of some abusive behavior and stalking incidents, I have full custody and my kids’ dad has supervised visitation. He is also not allowed to contact us but the kids can call him, which my tween does almost every day.

Recently, those phone calls have all turned into Dad questioning kid about my behavior, trying to figure out where I go, and whether I am ever alone with any men. Kid will call to tell Dad about a basketball game and Dad will want to know who I sat next to, who I talked to etc . . . rather than what was the score or how kid think he played. Kid is old enough to know what Dad is implying.

We will be back in court soon on a contempt issue and I would like to ask that these conversations happen through a parenting app that records them. Is that something the court would ever support?

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

Just stop the calls vs. all the drama.

[Anonymous]

I’m not sure.

But absent an order, be very careful about recording calls. Different states have different rules and it might be illegal

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

Just stop the calls vs. all the drama.

That could get her in trouble with the court.

What is the point of recording them? What do you think you would do with the recordings? It’s not like a judge will care if your ex is asking your kid about your interactions with other men.

[Anonymous]

Are you divorced or separated?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

You can ask for this, I’m not sure what a judge would say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

Just stop the calls vs. all the drama.

That could get her in trouble with the court.

What is the point of recording them? What do you think you would do with the recordings? It’s not like a judge will care if your ex is asking your kid about your interactions with other men.

+1,000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

Just stop the calls vs. all the drama.

That could get her in trouble with the court.

What is the point of recording them? What do you think you would do with the recordings? It’s not like a judge will care if your ex is asking your kid about your interactions with other men.

NP amd tend to agree with this. If your argument was that he was abusing the kids on the calls you might have something but I don't think him being nosey is going to get you anywhere.

Of course, we also only have a small paragraph from you so there might be facts and circumstances that we are unaware of which is why you should have a consult with a lawyer. This will take less than 30 minutes and will not be very expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No

You say this based on experience, or you're guessing?

Because there are laws on recording. If you want to stop the calls, stop them. Don't play games.

I am asking about having court order that calls go through a co-parenting app. The law requires that all parties be notified and consent to being recorded but the apps definitely make sure that happens.

Just stop the calls vs. all the drama.

That could get her in trouble with the court.

What is the point of recording them? What do you think you would do with the recordings? It’s not like a judge will care if your ex is asking your kid about your interactions with other men.

He has a history of figuring out where I am, or where the kids are when they aren’t with me (e.g. if they are at a sports practice) and “accidentally” showing up there and behaving in ways that qualify as stalking. So, being able to go back and say “Oh, actually I can prove he did know that we were going to that church service” would be helpful.

Also, implying to my kid that I might be having sex with his married coach or his friends’ fathers or whatever (something that only happens in his head) is totally inappropriate.

Plus it’s evidence that he’s not ready for unsupervised time if he can’t have a 5 minute conversation about an easy topic like a game.

[Anonymous]

I would speak with an attorney, but I don't think the request to record calls is going to help because your ex's behavior is frustrating and immature but not illegal.

What I would suggest is that you raise this in the upcoming contempt hearing, particularly given the existing stalking issue. Make sure your attorney conveys to the judge -- and that your teen corroborates -- that your ex is engaged in possessive and controlling behavior that leads you to feel unsafe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would speak with an attorney, but I don't think the request to record calls is going to help because your ex's behavior is frustrating and immature but not illegal.

What I would suggest is that you raise this in the upcoming contempt hearing, particularly given the existing stalking issue. Make sure your attorney conveys to the judge -- and that your teen corroborates -- that your ex is engaged in possessive and controlling behavior that leads you to feel unsafe.

NP and that's probably not going to work because OP wants to modify the existing custody order and a modification to the order is not before the court in a contempt proceeding. If you want that OP you will need to file a petition to modify the custody order to include that language.