10 Year Old Arrested for Hugging Counselor

[Anonymous]

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

I have a 10 yr old and I think this is a really absurd thing to say. 10 year olds are more than able to get not touching breasts. We aren’t talking about toddlers here. My kid’s class is writing novels and designing hypothetical museums out of dioramas. They are well past understanding not to violate bodily autonomy.

I don’t think the kid should be put on trial but your theory on this point is just out to lunch.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Fair point to the above. My oldest is 6 so I don’t really have first hand experience with what 10 year olds know/are capable of. I’m viewing this through the eyes of a mom with younger boys who absolutely still love body part/toilet humor and don’t yet understand bodies as having sexual parts.

[Anonymous]

I could totally see this being done on a dare or as a joke. Totally inappropriate and wrong, but not criminal. He’s 10.

[Anonymous]

Something similar has happened to me. I have been approached for a hug where I turned sideways to hug the person and my hand is on their chest.

In the instance above, I’m a female and when this happened it was with my male boss. He came up from walking behind me to congratulate me on a promotion. We were in front of the team so nothing weird just making an announcement that I was leaving the team. If I placed my hand at his stomach or waist it’s still an odd position. When someone turns sideways this time it was me, it always places the hands awkwardly.

I’m also busty (46b) if a child shorter than me (I am 5’3) hugs me their hands will be breast level or stomach level if I side hug.

I think it’s just the awkward positioning of side hugging or one person being sideways and hand placement 9/10 times.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know what happened but I don’t think the police should have been involved. Charging a 10 year old with battery over this is too much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

I have a 10 yr old and I think this is a really absurd thing to say. 10 year olds are more than able to get not touching breasts. We aren’t talking about toddlers here. My kid’s class is writing novels and designing hypothetical museums out of dioramas. They are well past understanding not to violate bodily autonomy.

I don’t think the kid should be put on trial but your theory on this point is just out to lunch.

Great points pp! And wow, where does your child attend school? My child was certainly not writing novels at age 10 (or even grade 10)!

[Anonymous]

OK this has all sorts of layers to it. But bottom line, he should be getting help, not arrested.

[Anonymous]

I read about this the other day and agree it seemed over the top given the information available. We don't know the full story, so I hope there's more to it to justify her going nuclear on a 10 yr old. If not, then she needs to find work that doesn't involve being around other humans, especially children.

[Anonymous]

From the article, this seems like an extreme reaction. Even if it was 100% intentional, arrest and charges seem like an extreme response. And I’m not sure how it could be determined that it was completely intentional. But assuming it was intentional, I can see insisting on counselling and possibly removing the child from that school. I still don’t understand arrest and charges for a first time offense.

A lot more info is needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Something similar has happened to me. I have been approached for a hug where I turned sideways to hug the person and my hand is on their chest.

In the instance above, I’m a female and when this happened it was with my male boss. He came up from walking behind me to congratulate me on a promotion. We were in front of the team so nothing weird just making an announcement that I was leaving the team. If I placed my hand at his stomach or waist it’s still an odd position. When someone turns sideways this time it was me, it always places the hands awkwardly.

I’m also busty (46b) if a child shorter than me (I am 5’3) hugs me their hands will be breast level or stomach level if I side hug.

I think it’s just the awkward positioning of side hugging or one person being sideways and hand placement 9/10 times.

This was how I read the encounter, it sounded awkward. But then the part about the kid screaming at the teacher had me wondering if there was more to the story (or maybe he was frustrated at being yelled at/not believed)? I suppose there is the chance this kid has a long history of inappropriate behavior (brings to mind the kid who raped a girl in the bathroom in Loudoun Co. and it turned out he had a long rap sheet of creepy behavior that the mom wrote off and no one did anything about). I hope so more facts come to light. But either way I agree with the above poster who says there are layers to this and the kid needs help.

And I think help could be anything from a reminder to watch hand placement to mandated counseling or the like. I truly wish there was some sort of independent agency charged with helping minors who need more than what the school can handle, but less than what the criminal justice system was built for. I’d hate for a kid to end up in the school to prison pipeline because of an accident or some very poor judgment as a child. Also, I’m having a hard time believing police would be called on a white kid from a wealthy family, but maybe that is just my cynicism talking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

I have a 10 yr old and I think this is a really absurd thing to say. 10 year olds are more than able to get not touching breasts. We aren’t talking about toddlers here. My kid’s class is writing novels and designing hypothetical museums out of dioramas. They are well past understanding not to violate bodily autonomy.

I don’t think the kid should be put on trial but your theory on this point is just out to lunch.

Not every kid is taught a boob is a sexual thing at 10. I doubt my kids at 10 thought boob is sexual.

Lol it’s FLA, they specifically have removed talk of anything sexual from curriculum.

Unless he was told once and he did it again it’s absurd.

[Anonymous]

When I saw arrest a 10yo - my first instinct was that the child is black and the counselor is white. That’s what happens to black boys and would never happen to a white boy.
And yep, confirmed.
How sad. Black boys (and girls) are treated like adults from a very young age.
Such an overreaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

I have a 10 yr old and I think this is a really absurd thing to say. 10 year olds are more than able to get not touching breasts. We aren’t talking about toddlers here. My kid’s class is writing novels and designing hypothetical museums out of dioramas. They are well past understanding not to violate bodily autonomy.

I don’t think the kid should be put on trial but your theory on this point is just out to lunch.

Not every kid is taught a boob is a sexual thing at 10. I doubt my kids at 10 thought boob is sexual.

Lol it’s FLA, they specifically have removed talk of anything sexual from curriculum.

Unless he was told once and he did it again it’s absurd.

A boob isn’t a “sexual” thing. But it is something you don’t touch. I am willing to give the counselor the benefit of the doubt that the situation was not an accident or confusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/10-year-old-student-hugged-school-counselor-now-facing-charges-accused-rcna56355

This raises some interesting questions. Obviously, there could be more facts here like this is a repeated pattern of behavior that the school cannot speak to. So I’m trying to keep an open mind.

But … the kid is 10. It’s entirely possible he a) accidentally touched her breast during the hug or b) has absolutely no understanding of the gravity of doing so. I’m not saying the counselor should give up her right to bodily autonomy, but it seems like this is a risk of working around kids and perhaps getting the criminal justice system involved is overkill. The racial differences also aren’t good optics.

Let’s say the kid truly is pervy, I don’t think this behavior should be enabled, but maybe a stern lesson could be taught without cops involved?

What says DCUM about this?

I have a 10 yr old and I think this is a really absurd thing to say. 10 year olds are more than able to get not touching breasts. We aren’t talking about toddlers here. My kid’s class is writing novels and designing hypothetical museums out of dioramas. They are well past understanding not to violate bodily autonomy.

I don’t think the kid should be put on trial but your theory on this point is just out to lunch.

Great points pp! And wow, where does your child attend school? My child was certainly not writing novels at age 10 (or even grade 10)!

A independent school in Anne Arundel county.