Buy Nothing/sale group admins who get off on nonsensical 'rules'
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Anonymous
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Just a vent. I'm a member of a Buy Nothing group, which has been very useful, both for giving away items that are no longer wanted, and gaining things from neighbors. I get that part of the idea is to "build community," (which does organically happen in some cases), but mostly the point is...we want stuff out of our house. I don't see anything wrong with that.
We've had a few posts flag recently where the person offering posts the item, someone replies "Interested," and the person offering says something like, "It's yours! Sending you a PM now." Then the admin comes on and blah blah blahs about how you should--and I really do quote--"let items 'simmer' so that more people have a chance to be picked" and I'm like--I'm not "picking," I'm getting rid of stuff to someone who promptly says they want it. What is the problem. The admin also says things like, "Write a bit about why you want the item and how you would use it." I don't care if someone wants the Elsa doll for their daughter, son, neighbor, or church play room, I just want it gone to someone who will use it! Ugh. Seriously ever few posts, the admin is on there, getting her rocks off about "do this" and "don't do that." It's ruining a good thing. |
Anonymous
| The admin of mine is a total power hungry B. So so so much drama. I quit and someone started a spin off group without any of the crazy rules. Now I give away all my stuff through that group. |
Anonymous
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I agree, OP. If anyone wants to use stuff I don't want, get it out of my house!
I only do our local freecycle group, and the less information from the taker, the better! |
Anonymous
| Oh! I also want to add that I've been passed over for things offered because someone had a compelling story. That's totally fine! If the poster wants to feel a bit better about helping someone out in need, have at it! |
Anonymous
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The world is full of people who are itching for the opportunity to tell people what to do. Seriously, you find these people EVERYWHERE. And they will seize power when given the opportunity, even if it is not at all earned and the people they wield it over don't like it. The admin of the buy-nothing group, the guy in your office who organizes the softball team, the president of your HOA, etc.
It's the Dwight Schrute rule. If there is power to be had, some self-important jackass will seize it and try to make your life miserable. This is why I don't join "communities" anymore. It's like catnip to these people. Also won't joint the PTO. My family and friends are my community, I'm friendly with my neighbors, and I donate money and volunteer when I have the money and time to spare and I'm passionate about a cause. But I am not a joiner because I grew tired of people like this and just wanted to be free. (I get rid of stuff by curbing it, taking it to the dump, or posting it on Nextdoor.) |
Anonymous
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Interesting. Are those the rules of your buy nothing?
Mine does not have that rule but we were supposed to read and agree to rules when we joined the group. |
Anonymous
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Yes, I am very uncomfortable with this aspect of Buy Nothing. I don't want to choose who is most worthy. I pick the first response or the person physically nearest me.
The only reason I use Buy Nothing more than Freecycle is that Freecycle has a delay while a moderator reviews your post, and sometimes I'm trying to get stuff gone on the weekends. |
Anonymous
Just write back" Nope - I would like to clear things out sooner than later. I don't have a lot of time to spend on FB  "
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Anonymous
| This happened to me too on Buy Nothing and it’s why I only use Freecycle. There are far fewer hoarder weirdos on Freecycle. |
Anonymous
These are the rules of all buy nothings. We have a spin off group in my neighborhood that plays much looser with the rules and is much more enjoyable. |
Anonymous
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I think it depends on who is the admin. In mine, it is your choice on how you want to give it. Some people specify "flash give away" or say specifically - goes to the first person that can pick it up.
I agree that that's not fair. You are giving away the stuff, you should get to choose. I only let things simmer if I know it will be an item that is in hot demand. |
Anonymous
| Are you in N Arlington? (Just surprised that this would happen with some frequency!) I left my group for exactly these reasons, OP. Crazytown. |
Anonymous
| My buy nothing has the opposite problem — our admin takes months (like up to 6 months) to admit new members to the group because she’s “busy” but has rejected all offers of support from other members to maybe help clear out the backlog. |
Anonymous
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I'm a buy nothing admin, only because we were getting kicked out of the "too large" neighborhood next to us.
The only rule I really enforce is that you must live in our boundaries. After we got kicked out of the last group, we had an influx of the other group picking up things, but posting free items in their own group. Other than that and no sales/business postings, it's very simple/un-moderated. |
Anonymous
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Then this is not the group for you. Use Freecycle or post free on marketplace. But Nothing groups want you to let things simmer for at a minimum a few hours so the greedy ones don’t get everything and you can pick someone that maybe hasn’t ever been picked.
Just leave the group and set your stuff on the curb then. |