BIL 30 min late to pick up our kid from school

[Anonymous]

BIL was supposed to pick up our child from school and was 30 min late. I can’t imagine being 5 min late, let alone 30 min late. DS was standing outside with a teacher for 25 min after the last kid was picked up.

BIL is 30 and single and thinks we are overreacting. I’m just so mad. Dh is mad.

What pisses me off is that BIL was working a half day and had 3 hours to pick up our child, which is why we asked him in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Does he have kids? Did he realize there isn’t much flexibility with kiddo pickup? Did he do it as a favor to you? Is he normally a caring uncle and a reliable caretaker?

[Anonymous]

So pick the child up yourself next time.

[Anonymous]

I know a few habitually tardy people, my own BIL included, who wouldn't think anything of waltzing in 30 minutes late.

I think you can reiterate to your BIL that it's extremely rude of him to make the teacher wait outside, and that daycares charge by the minute after pick-up time, and he's lucky school teachers aren't allowed to do that. But if he's anything like the usual ADHD type of person with no sense of time, he won't change at all...

[Anonymous]

I'm a DINK female who is works in an education adjacent job. I'd have to tell my DINK husband who is 50 8 times that he can NOT BE LATE for an assignment like this, and that for this if he is not 5 minutes early he is late. A 30 year old guy with no kids who has no school based experience for work will not know how important this is.

[Anonymous]

Why is it his job to pick up YOUR kid? Are you paying him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a few habitually tardy people, my own BIL included, who wouldn't think anything of waltzing in 30 minutes late.

I think you can reiterate to your BIL that it's extremely rude of him to make the teacher wait outside, and that daycares charge by the minute after pick-up time, and he's lucky school teachers aren't allowed to do that. But if he's anything like the usual ADHD type of person with no sense of time, he won't change at all...

^ me again. I too have ADHD, but I'm also cursed/blessed with social anxiety and make a great effort not to be late!

[Anonymous]

Don't do it again, send a thank you card or buy a gift for the teacher who waited with your child (and let the principal know how much you appreciate it so it goes in her file).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:BIL was supposed to pick up our child from school and was 30 min late. I can’t imagine being 5 min late, let alone 30 min late. DS was standing outside with a teacher for 25 min after the last kid was picked up.

BIL is 30 and single and thinks we are overreacting. I’m just so mad. Dh is mad.

What pisses me off is that BIL was working a half day and had 3 hours to pick up our child, which is why we asked him in the first place.

He doesn't get it. Don't ever ask him again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:BIL was supposed to pick up our child from school and was 30 min late. I can’t imagine being 5 min late, let alone 30 min late. DS was standing outside with a teacher for 25 min after the last kid was picked up.

BIL is 30 and single and thinks we are overreacting. I’m just so mad. Dh is mad.

What pisses me off is that BIL was working a half day and had 3 hours to pick up our child, which is why we asked him in the first place.

He doesn't get it. Don't ever ask him again.

+1..Not his responsibility. Your the parent and ultimately you are to blame…at least that is how the school will see it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a few habitually tardy people, my own BIL included, who wouldn't think anything of waltzing in 30 minutes late.

I think you can reiterate to your BIL that it's extremely rude of him to make the teacher wait outside, and that daycares charge by the minute after pick-up time, and he's lucky school teachers aren't allowed to do that. But if he's anything like the usual ADHD type of person with no sense of time, he won't change at all...

It was rude of the OP not to find a reliable person to pick up their child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:BIL was supposed to pick up our child from school and was 30 min late. I can’t imagine being 5 min late, let alone 30 min late. DS was standing outside with a teacher for 25 min after the last kid was picked up.

BIL is 30 and single and thinks we are overreacting. I’m just so mad. Dh is mad.

What pisses me off is that BIL was working a half day and had 3 hours to pick up our child, which is why we asked him in the first place.

He doesn't get it. Don't ever ask him again.

+1..Not his responsibility. Your the parent and ultimately you are to blame…at least that is how the school will see it.

+2. Now you know. Don’t ask him again. In the grand scheme of things this is nothing but I’d still be a bit annoyed.

[Anonymous]

At least BIL showed up at pickup 😁. He could have blew it off.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why you feel you have domination over his non working time.. so what if he ended work at 12 and your kid was to be picked up at 3? I imagine at 30, he is an autonomous adult. Is there something else at play. Like he lives with you, is not paying rent, and picking up your kid is part of the arrangement?

[Anonymous]

Lesson learned. He is unreliable for this task. Don’t ask him ever again.