Do most of you not realize how out of touch and privileged you are?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Living in American is privilege in itself. Folks really need to travel overseas to get a true appreciation for what they have here.

Also, handouts never worked and never will work. The more you give the more people want. People wonder how "immigrants" have done so well to include cars, homes and wealth. That's because most don't expect the government to bail them out. Even working 2-3 jobs they will make more than they ever would back home!

I was in Sweden a few years ago. I definitely did not come back here with an appreciation for much of anything except cheaper clothing.

So how do countries like Germany, Denmark, etc. still succeed while supporting their people? Why aren't we comparing ourselves to them?

I’m from a Nordic country and the Nordic countries do it with oil wealth, which is ultimately not sustainable because that money will run out, that’s why there’s such a drive to invest in other industries. Inequality is definitely growing there, look at the latest poverty numbers there. There’s also a huge pressure to conform. Every lives the same way, dresses the same, drives the same car. If someone gets a fancy car, they’re looked down upon. Immigrants trying to practice their own customs? Better assimilate as quickly as possible. Black people? My relatives are all closet racists that make people in the Southern US look quaint. Comparing tiny countries with very similar people to the diversity and size of the US makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love a DCUM rule where you aren't allowed to post about yout >=$400k HHI without first acknowledging your privilege.

Do you mean acknowledging your gratitude or somehow conceding the fruits of our labors are unearned?

It’s a market economy. Some of us put our skills to work in jobs that reward us financially. Others lack such skills or prefer to pursue lower-paying jobs. People like the OP are a dime a dozen and brimming with resentment that usually stems from self-loathing.

This. There is no "deserve." Who can decide who deserves what? No one.

Agree completely. I think our healthcare system needs an overhaul but ultimately if OP is barely making ends meet as an Uber driver, that’s not anyone’s fault but OP’s. This country is made up of immigrants who show us everyday what you can achieve in this country.

[Anonymous]

One of my main goals in reading DCUM is to find out all the secret things rich people think that are all unknown to me because I didn’t grow up among them, but now live among them due to a confluence of hard work and luck.
As just one example, I learned about this brand called Tory Burch that supposedly all the rich suburbanites wear. It seems a total rip off to me but shortly after reading that I was at a PTA meeting and the women next to me had matching Tori Burch shoes and purse! I never would have known that it was a thing and now I see them everywhere (well, maybe less now). The funny part is that I accidentally dropped half a muffin in her bag because she left it open on the floor between our seats and my plate of snacks wobbled. I felt bad but also wasn’t quite willing to stop her after the meeting and admit I dropped a muffin in her bag. If you are reading, rich neighbor, I’m sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:" 30s buying million + dollar homes, people who are 40 years old and already 401(k) millionaires, people who have funded their future kids' college education "

That me but I'm self-made. My parents came to the United States as immigrants with $5 in their pocket. I learned hard work from them and started working at very early age and continue to do so today at the age of 41. Nothing was handed to us, no inheritance, no nothing. A lot of folks don't understand what they have here in the United States. It truly is the land of opportunity. A lof of us were not born with a gold spoon and have actually worked really hard for where we are today!

But OP wants to punish you for it. See? Nuts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of us worked hard in school, spend years in college and graduate school and put in long hours at work. It isn't that hard of a formula.

Also, your anger is directed at people who are WORKING for money. Maybe you should redirect it to people who either aren't working and living off the system or those not working and living off trust funds.

This is just not true. The majority of these people were funded by their parents either through paying for education, help with rent, car payments, assistance with first home down payment, trusts or similar. The idea that the 1% is "working for money' is laughable. They were gifted funds and hardly seem to realize it. That's what OP is on about.

There’s always going to be a 1%. My family came from a communist country. The communists replaced the aristocracy with their pals and that became the new aristocracy. You’re always going to have some sort of ruling class and I doubt any of those folks are visiting DCUM. OP just wants to complain for the sake of complaining. You want to change something OP? Run for office on a local level and start working to make your community better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of my main goals in reading DCUM is to find out all the secret things rich people think that are all unknown to me because I didn’t grow up among them, but now live among them due to a confluence of hard work and luck.
As just one example, I learned about this brand called Tory Burch that supposedly all the rich suburbanites wear. It seems a total rip off to me but shortly after reading that I was at a PTA meeting and the women next to me had matching Tori Burch shoes and purse! I never would have known that it was a thing and now I see them everywhere (well, maybe less now). The funny part is that I accidentally dropped half a muffin in her bag because she left it open on the floor between our seats and my plate of snacks wobbled. I felt bad but also wasn’t quite willing to stop her after the meeting and admit I dropped a muffin in her bag. If you are reading, rich neighbor, I’m sorry.

Lol. You are great!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would love a DCUM rule where you aren't allowed to post about yout >=$400k HHI without first acknowledging your privilege.

Do you mean acknowledging your gratitude or somehow conceding the fruits of our labors are unearned?

It’s a market economy. Some of us put our skills to work in jobs that reward us financially. Others lack such skills or prefer to pursue lower-paying jobs. People like the OP are a dime a dozen and brimming with resentment that usually stems from self-loathing.

This. There is no "deserve." Who can decide who deserves what? No one.

Agree completely. I think our healthcare system needs an overhaul but ultimately if OP is barely making ends meet as an Uber driver, that’s not anyone’s fault but OP’s. This country is made up of immigrants who show us everyday what you can achieve in this country.

I would say that it is not OP's "fault" either. No one can control the job market. We are all just doing the best we can.

[Anonymous]

Look, this is a money forum. You post your money stuff. I post my money stuff. That's how it works. This forum isn't about only posting rich money issues nor is it just about posting poor money issues. It's about all money issues. Kinda selfish of you to wish ill and hate on others because they are in a better financial position then you are. There will always be people in a better position (better fitness position, better financial position, better age position, better health position, better looks position, better education position, better job position, better luck position, etc) than you. Best accept it now, don't you think?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
It doesn't disgust me, it amuses me.

Many people don't realize much of it is just luck. Even for the ones who clawed their way out of poverty. Actually, the latter may be more able to appreciate exactly how luck plays into it, and how, obviously, you also "create your luck" to some extent, through hard work.

If I’m not mistaken, most US millionaires are self-made, correct? It’s not inherited wealth. So hard work and taking risks is definitely part of the equation but so is mindset. There’s a reason that lottery winners and sports stars end up broke after a few years.

LOL no. Unless you count having your parents pay for college or help you out with a down payment or loan you some money to start your first business as "self-made." There might be a few real rags-to-riches stories, but that's the exception, because the US has very low social mobility.

https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/2871-how-most-millionaires-got-rich.html

If you’re talking about the folks on the Forbes list, that’s one thing, but most millionaires are self made.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and here OP is taking time out of their day (which is a privilege) typing on their computer (a privilege), accessing high speed internet (a privilege) most likely in their warm, comfortable, safe home (a privilege).

We are ALL privileged, some more than others, but for the love of god, your keyboard warrior mentality is sad.

Why don't you just say "her" day, her computer, her home.

There is no male on the planet that would carry on like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just dropping in here to say that this forum makes me want to vomit. Especially here.

All this talk of people in their 30s buying million + dollar homes, people who are 40 years old and already 401(k) millionaires, people who have funded their future kids' college education while talking down to those who struggle to pay back their student loans only hoping for a break someday, people here bemoaning the budget constraints of a HHI of "only" $200K, people with investment properties, people with investments, period. Do you not understand that the average American cannot withstand a $500 emergency? That there is an eviction crisis in this country? That medical debt makes people wonder if their life-saving medical treatments are even worth the "life" they get to live afterwards? How one economic downturn can render a hardworking family penniless and homeless? That the AVERAGE household income yes IN THE DC AREA is far, FAR below the individual salaries thrown about in these discussions and that yes, AVERAGE and, gasp, below average HHI families need a place to live too? Two hour commutes each way be damned, "go move somewhere you can afford!"

I completely understand why people made guillotine memes in response to the proposed $600 stimulus checks this winter. And guess what, $1400 is not enough either. I hope all of you out of touch privileged people are taxed so hard your eyes bleed. You people are the swamp everybody else loves to hate. We need to tax the rich into oblivion and collectivize their assets, I swear to god. Don't EVER try to justify your cushy job as having "Earned" your right to complain about property taxes on your second investment property when this country operates like the Third World when trying to meet other people's basic needs.

What do you want me to do about it? Cry in my pillow tonight because I'm well off?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Living in American is privilege in itself. Folks really need to travel overseas to get a true appreciation for what they have here.

Also, handouts never worked and never will work. The more you give the more people want. People wonder how "immigrants" have done so well to include cars, homes and wealth. That's because most don't expect the government to bail them out. Even working 2-3 jobs they will make more than they ever would back home!

I was in Sweden a few years ago. I definitely did not come back here with an appreciation for much of anything except cheaper clothing.

So how do countries like Germany, Denmark, etc. still succeed while supporting their people? Why aren't we comparing ourselves to them?

I’m from a Nordic country and the Nordic countries do it with oil wealth, which is ultimately not sustainable because that money will run out, that’s why there’s such a drive to invest in other industries. Inequality is definitely growing there, look at the latest poverty numbers there. There’s also a huge pressure to conform. Every lives the same way, dresses the same, drives the same car. If someone gets a fancy car, they’re looked down upon. Immigrants trying to practice their own customs? Better assimilate as quickly as possible. Black people? My relatives are all closet racists that make people in the Southern US look quaint. Comparing tiny countries with very similar people to the diversity and size of the US makes no sense.

+1. I'm from Germany and all the high achievers I know from school immigrated to or want to be in the US for better career opportunities. Also, serious lack of diversity in Germany -- the strong social nets only work because the beneficiaries are mostly other white Germans. Look what happened during the refugee crisis in Europe -- no countries wanted to accept them and provide them with the benefits.

[Anonymous]

OP sounds like a pauper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is just going to turn into a humble bragging circle-jerk for defensive so-called “self made” users here.

Yep. Lots of people explaining why THEY are super-rich because of their own hard work and good choices, and THEY deserve their good fortune, but THEY are super down to earth or aware of their privileges, and also everyone could be successful if they just worked hard enough, because that's definitely how life works.

But that is exactly how life works in the US. Not in many other countries, but definitely in the US. My mom came here when I was 6. She had $250 in her pocket, didn’t speak a word of English, and settled in subsidized housing given to her by the immigration agency as she was a refugee. She learned English, worked cleaning restaurants and offices, on weekends I helped. The school I went to wasn’t great by any means but if I brought home anything lower than top marks, there was hell to pay because “we came to this country for a chance and you have the chance to do better”. We didn’t own a TV, I slept on a mattress in the living room, food was pasta, so much pasta and whatever else was on sale. Clothes were all donations and books were from the library. I had no presents for my birthday, but she did make cake. No vacations, no camps, no lessons (though I did play an instrument after 6th grade thanks to music classes in school). For 10 years, she drove a run down car with peeling paint that was basically held together with duct tape. She got a couple of the ladies she worked with and they started a cleaning business. That business helped pay for college for me, along with Pell grants and me working. I didn’t go to a private college and lived at home to save money on housing. I didn’t get much choice in college major because I knew I needed to earn good money, I couldn’t just get my BA in Art History and intern for a year. I did accounting because it was practical and paid well. I got my masters. I married my husband (also from an immigrant family, he’s an attorney). We lived very frugally until his loans were paid off and then once he hit 35, his income really went up. Suddenly we are making serious money but we are investing it. We do own a $1m+ house, our cars are both under 50k and we paid cash for them. We took our first vacation after we paid off his loans. We have two kids (we can’t comfortably afford three), we help our parents out and they help us out with babysitting. The American dream is possible but what I see going on isn’t that the dream is dead, it’s that folks don’t want to work for it or they make dumb decisions.

Americans are up to their eyeballs in debt. I’m not talking medical debt (that’s it’s own separate issue and I very much support universal healthcare and would pay higher taxes for it). I’ve seen guys earning 100k and blowing it on car payments, buying houses they can’t afford, and other crap they don’t need. There’s a sense of entitlement to it, like they should be able to have everything. And then I also saw how little folks value education. Immigrant kids get a beating if they don’t bring home good grades, meanwhile you have American kids skipping school or talking back to teachers and parents support the kids! So all this crying about how life isn’t fair is ridiculous. Of course it’s not fair! Nothing is fair. Every country has its own problems, but be glad your problem is just debt. Where my mom is from, if you owed someone money, they’d come to your door in the middle of the night and you’d disappear. You wanted to start a business and it made someone upset, they could hire someone to shoot up your business. You got sick and didn’t have any money, there was plenty of hospital space but no medicine at all. And you can’t change anything about your situation. In America, you can change things. Your town has no jobs? Move. You can’t afford a house? Get a different job. America isn’t perfect (I’m not trying to sweep racial inequality under the table) but it’s got opportunities. It just requires you to actually work for the opportunities, instead of insisting on them just because you were born here.

Bingo! Now why people make dumb decisions is a different question... I honestly don't know why most of them are of a certain "culture".

To which “culture” are you referring?

[Anonymous]

I don’t think OP is dissing self made well off people. It’s the absurd stuff you read on DCUM like:
Calling normal houses that cost 700-800k shacks
Making fun/ridiculing people’s vacation choices like everyone has the option to go abroad or drop thousands of dollars on a trip
Calling themselves middle class with incomes at 200k+
Not understanding the difficult decisions families have to make about daycare
Not understanding that hard work doesn’t always translate
into making $$$. Plenty of smart and hard working people will never make a crap load of money.