Stone Ridge

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have never posted before on this site, but could not help myself here. We have a daughter in the US, she started in the LS. It is a fantastic school, and the families we have met are generally down to earth. My daughter's teachers are very good, and some are exceptionally talented. Obviously there are some people who feel as though they are on the outside, and no doubt there is some of that, possibly more sports-based than donor-based, but I do not know. Those who feel they are outsiders seem overrepresented on this board, but it appears to be enough of an issue that the school should try and address it. That said, the notion that the administration should be torn down does not resonate with me. CRK has a very difficult job. In today's society, you are damned if you do, and damned if you don't. I would not want to run a school these days, and I would not want to run a business these days. She is a good leader and a good face of the school, and it is highly unlikely you could find someone better. My fear has always been that she would leave, and that the school would suffer as a result.

Totally agree on CRK. There are a lot of people who seem to blame her for everything, and I think they're nuts. She's got a really hard job trying to please multiple constituencies. She's got the devout - sorta - not Catholic continuum, the woke / not-woke, the donor / non-donor, and the sporty vs. nerdy continuums, plus dealing with faculty, which has been its own challenge through Covid. She's competent, works hard, and is a great speaker and public face for the school.

I don't think people are asserting it is an "easy" job, but that IS the job - to manage a number of stakeholders in a way that advances the students' experience on campus and the girls' ability to get a strong education, across all three divisions. We live in an area where there are many private schools (both in the DMV and up 95 in Baltimore) that serve as benchmarks. This past year has tested school leaders and while I would not characterize myself or our family as feeling like an "outsider" or "upset", I do objectively think leadership at SR has not been as strong as at other schools. At a minimum, the communication from the school has not presented it in that light (and even can come off as tone-deaf at times). It is always hard to pinpoint what makes someone a great leader - while competence and hard work are musts for a school head - it seems many on this board think the "tone at the top" is perhaps "off".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I don't think people are asserting it is an "easy" job, but that IS the job - to manage a number of stakeholders in a way that advances the students' experience on campus and the girls' ability to get a strong education, across all three divisions. We live in an area where there are many private schools (both in the DMV and up 95 in Baltimore) that serve as benchmarks. This past year has tested school leaders and while I would not characterize myself or our family as feeling like an "outsider" or "upset", I do objectively think leadership at SR has not been as strong as at other schools. At a minimum, the communication from the school has not presented it in that light (and even can come off as tone-deaf at times). It is always hard to pinpoint what makes someone a great leader - while competence and hard work are musts for a school head - it seems many on this board think the "tone at the top" is perhaps "off".

I put it down to a seeming unwillingness to listen. I feel like when I bring an issue up it is as if they listen but they don't really hear what's being said. They don't like what they see as complainers even when the complaint is justified and the institution needs to learn something. It is not a coincidence that people post in frustration on this forum because they don't feel they can get an audience for their issues anywhere else. We get these endless surveys that seem to be just window dressing. There is a strong sense that those at the top know everything and you are made to feel like your view is discounted, even though you're paying the bills.

[Anonymous]

Agree the administration is tone-deaf to the concerns/ considerations of "regular folks". My my DD has great teachers and friends so we are content. No place is perfect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Agree the administration is tone-deaf to the concerns/ considerations of "regular folks". My my DD has great teachers and friends so we are content. No place is perfect.

That's right. It is what it is. Grateful for what's good and we ignore the nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Having kids who have gone through other private schools, SR leadership is far below other schools and the last 12 months has only widened that gap. After a decade of this leadership, it really has transformed the school in some slightly unsavory ways though clearly has built up pieces of SR such as the facilities though with a large price tag.

That said, agree with other pp, most families can either ignore the bad parts or or navigate through it focusing on the good parts. There are a lot of good faculty. Some parts of the curriculum is very strong. But I have known of way too many families who have had a negative experience that really impacted their child and the administration response was tone deaf.

For a new family, would recommend go in optimistically but would keep a discerning eye so you can best support your daughter. I think that is true for most schools, but in SR case, the marketing, messaging, image that brings you to the school is so strong that people get surprised

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I don't think people are asserting it is an "easy" job, but that IS the job - to manage a number of stakeholders in a way that advances the students' experience on campus and the girls' ability to get a strong education, across all three divisions. We live in an area where there are many private schools (both in the DMV and up 95 in Baltimore) that serve as benchmarks. This past year has tested school leaders and while I would not characterize myself or our family as feeling like an "outsider" or "upset", I do objectively think leadership at SR has not been as strong as at other schools. At a minimum, the communication from the school has not presented it in that light (and even can come off as tone-deaf at times). It is always hard to pinpoint what makes someone a great leader - while competence and hard work are musts for a school head - it seems many on this board think the "tone at the top" is perhaps "off".

I put it down to a seeming unwillingness to listen. I feel like when I bring an issue up it is as if they listen but they don't really hear what's being said. They don't like what they see as complainers even when the complaint is justified and the institution needs to learn something. It is not a coincidence that people post in frustration on this forum because they don't feel they can get an audience for their issues anywhere else. We get these endless surveys that seem to be just window dressing. There is a strong sense that those at the top know everything and you are made to feel like your view is discounted, even though you're paying the bills.

You may be paying the bills, at least for the period of time your daughter is there. But among the many voices, that of the parents is least listened to.

A senior administrator at a Catholic school very much like SR told me, Parents come and then they go. By the time their kids are seniors they are usually dialed out. Until then we listen politely. We know they’ll be moving on shortly.”

The attitude was ,”We are running the school and the parents are not.”

Some parents think their “paying the bills” should give them more say on how things are done. It doesn’t. And the school would be impossible to administer if they started letting the parents into the decision or policy making process.

[Anonymous]

For me it's not a question of "paying the bills" but more the fact that the image is different from the reality. Now I'm sure that's true in most cases but there does appear to be a larger dichotomy between the two at SR. I know the Head of School is very image conscious and I suppose there is an argument to be made that image is reality these days. But the students are intelligent and insightful young women and they are not taken in by the pronouncements and pretensions of the administration. Far from it. I comfort myself with the fact that there is a lesson to be learned here as well. Be honest and be forthright. Don't be like those who dissemble. And learn to tell who they are.

[Anonymous]

Stone Ridge sounds like a mess. I know so many girls who either don’t want to even apply or, if they do, choose Visitation, Holy Child, St. John’s, and other independents over it. I always wondered why? Maybe all this underlying negativity has affected the culture the girls see and hear about and is part of the reason why.

[Anonymous]

Less negativity and more a pervasive fakeness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stone Ridge sounds like a mess. I know so many girls who either don’t want to even apply or, if they do, choose Visitation, Holy Child, St. John’s, and other independents over it. I always wondered why? Maybe all this underlying negativity has affected the culture the girls see and hear about and is part of the reason why.

SR is a great school academically but a toxic mess socially. There is also an unprofessionalism in some parts of the administration that is extremely disappointing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stone Ridge sounds like a mess. I know so many girls who either don’t want to even apply or, if they do, choose Visitation, Holy Child, St. John’s, and other independents over it. I always wondered why? Maybe all this underlying negativity has affected the culture the girls see and hear about and is part of the reason why.

SR is a great school academically but a toxic mess socially. There is also an unprofessionalism in some parts of the administration that is extremely disappointing.

A large part of that is because people are appointed to leadership positions who are incapable of performing the job adequately. There is, of course, the obsession over hiring SR alumnae (regardless of suitability), but there is also a problem with professional management and accountability at all levels of leadership in the school. Gossip and backbiting take the place of mature interaction. There is also very little in the way of concrete outcome expectation and any kind of objective measurement against goals and targets. Eduspeak takes the place of insight and competence. I also sense a deep insecurity at the top which impacts everything underneath it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There are kids from every school at gatherings every weekend. There are parents at SR who are quick to blame other parents and their own kids are out and about they just don’t realize it. Furthermore - some of the most vocal upper school girls at SR who have been very quick to throw shade on classmates also have posted pictures of themselves at gatherings - not socially distanced.

Most students are not partiers and do not fit this description. [/

I’m not referring to “partiers” as you just did. - just talking about groups of teens from many friend groups doing normal things that they haven’t been allowed to do for a year. Like taking group shots at monuments in Dc not socially distanced without masks etc. My point is that some of the girls and parents at my daughter’s school are out doing things and the parents have no clue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stone Ridge sounds like a mess. I know so many girls who either don’t want to even apply or, if they do, choose Visitation, Holy Child, St. John’s, and other independents over it. I always wondered why? Maybe all this underlying negativity has affected the culture the girls see and hear about and is part of the reason why.

I don’t think this is true at all. I have a son and another daughter at other private schools
In the area and they are dealing with the same issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree the administration is tone-deaf to the concerns/ considerations of "regular folks". My my DD has great teachers and friends so we are content. No place is perfect.

That's right. It is what it is. Grateful for what's good and we ignore the nonsense.

Great point

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Having kids who have gone through other private schools, SR leadership is far below other schools and the last 12 months has only widened that gap. After a decade of this leadership, it really has transformed the school in some slightly unsavory ways though clearly has built up pieces of SR such as the facilities though with a large price tag.

That said, agree with other pp, most families can either ignore the bad parts or or navigate through it focusing on the good parts. There are a lot of good faculty. Some parts of the curriculum is very strong. But I have known of way too many families who have had a negative experience that really impacted their child and the administration response was tone deaf.

For a new family, would recommend go in optimistically but would keep a discerning eye so you can best support your daughter. I think that is true for most schools, but in SR case, the marketing, messaging, image that brings you to the school is so strong that people get surprised

I am a new parent to Stone Ridge this year. So far we have had no problems in the US, although it is not a normal year due to COVID. You have joined many in saying the administration is tone deaf when responding to families' concerns. Can you provide an example? did your daughter have a negative experience or was it just her fellow students that you learned about?